Title: The Promise
Author: Mary


Part one

I turned to look at Neil, then back to David. My head was spinning. I couldn't move, I couldn't
breathe. Then I remembered my dream, and the spell broke. I put the ring back in David's hands.
"I'm so sorry, David." I saw the pain and shock in his eyes, but I could not take the time to
comfort him or explain. I had to talk to Neil! I ran to him, just as I did in my dream. He
reached down for me and we rode off. I didn't look back. 

When we were far enough away from the mission, Neil stopped. He tied Charlie to a tree and we
began to walk along the edge of a field. I wanted to speak, but I didn't know how to begin.
Finally, Neil said, "Christy, whatever you think you saw between me and Margaret . . ." he
stopped and turned to face me. "I don't love her, Christy. I couldn't bear to let you think
that I did." He put his hand against my cheek and I held his gaze. "I'm sorry if I've hurt
you." His hand was cool and gentle against my burning cheek. I placed my own hand over his. 

"Where is Margaret now?" I asked. Neil pulled his hand away. 

"I don't know." he said. "She was standing by the river when I left . . . I've no idea if
she'll still be there when I get back." He took a step closer to me, his gaze intense. "But
even if she's gone, I'm not free." 

"I know." I replied. He was standing so close, surely he could hear the fierce pounding of my
heart. I could feel the tears in my eyes, threatening to overflow. Neil placed his hands on my
arms. 

"I don't have any answers, Christy." He said softly. My tears spilled over. Neil pulled me into
an embrace. He smelled of tobacco and wood smoke, and of pine trees. The strength of his arms
encircled me. I felt safe, comforted. But I could not forget Margaret. It was her husband who
held me in his arms. I pulled away. 

"We should get back," I said, not meeting his eyes. 

"Yes," he agreed. We rode back in silence. 

Neil reined in Charlie in front of the empty school. As I dismounted, Neil held on to my arm.
"I'll speak to you in a couple of days, Miss Huddleston," he said carefully. I understood his
unspoken message. Our conversation was far from over, but we both needed time to think. I
looked up at him and attempted a smile. 

"I'll be here," I promised. He released me and I turned and walked towards the mission house. I
was inside before I heard the sound of retreating hoofbeats, carrying Neil away from me, to
Margaret. 

I tried to put my thoughts in some kind of order. David! I had just left him at the
schoolhouse. He must be furious. And Neil . . .I loved him. I loved him and I knew he loved me.
But there was Margaret. Margaret MacNeill. His wife. So I had no right to love him, would never
be free to tell him how much I cared, would never kiss him . . . 

"Christy? Are you unwell?" Miss Alice was standing before me, an expression of concern on her
face. The kindness in her eyes was too much for me. A sob escaped, and then I was crying on
Miss Alice's shoulder. Miss Alice led me to the table and helped me into a chair. She sat down
facing me as I tried to stop the flow of my tears. "Tell me what is troubling thee," she said
gently. 

"Oh, Miss Alice, I am such a fool!" I cried in despair. She waited for me to go on. "I am in
love with Dr. MacNeill." I could detect neither anger nor surprise on her face. "I rode over to
his cabin this afternoon. I wanted to somehow let him know how I felt. I know it was wrong! I
was thoughtless and impulsive. When I got there, I saw Margaret's luggage on the porch. Then I
saw she and Neil embracing by the river." Emotions played over Miss Alice's face as I spoke. "I
left immediately," I continued, "and I didn't think they'd seen me. I was confused and upset.
When I rode up to the school, David came out to meet me. He proposed again and put an
engagement ring in my hands. I didn't know what to do. Then Neil arrived. I just knew I had to
speak with him. I gave the ring back to David and said I was sorry. Then I left with Neil." I
paused, thinking of David. "David must despise me," I said. 

"You spoke to Neil . . ." Miss Alice prompted. 

"He told me I was mistaken about him and Margaret. That he doesn't love her." Too late, I
realized what I'd said. "I'm sorry, Miss Alice." 

"Go on." 

"He said he was sorry he'd hurt me, but that he didn't have any answers. Then we came back." 

"You did not tell him of your feelings?" Miss Alice asked. 

"No." I waited for Miss Alice's reaction. It was a relief to have confessed it all to her, but
my emotions were still very close to the surface. She was silent for some minutes, gazing at me
thoughtfully. Finally she spoke. 

"Thee has done nothing so very terrible." Miss Alice said, placing her hand over mine. "David
and Neil have also played a role in creating this situation. Of course you must not marry David
if you do not love him. The timing of his proposal was . . .unfortunate. I am sure he is
disappointed, but in time he will understand, and forgive thee. As for Neil MacNeill, he is
married to Margaret whether he loves her or not. There is nothing thee can do about it,
whatever your feelings. With God's help . . ." Miss Alice was interrupted by a shout from
outside. It came again. 

"Alice!" We rushed out to the porch. Dr. MacNeill had left his horse near the school and was
now hurrying towards the mission, carrying someone in his arms. It was Margaret. They were both
wet and muddy. Miss Alice let out a cry and rushed towards them. I couldn't move. It was as
though my feet had frozen to the porch. Neil's eyes were desperate. "Alice, it's Margaret. It's
Margaret, Alice," he kept repeating. Miss Alice touched Margaret's hair, her cheek. Her eyes
searched Neil's face. 

"Is she . . .is she dead, Neil?" she asked, her voice shaking. Neil reacted as though he'd been
slapped. His eyes focused. His voice was low and controlled. 

"Yes, she's dead, Alice. She's dead. I've killed her." 


Part two

"Killed her?" Miss Alice repeated, "What do you mean?" 

"I left her there. I left her to go after Christy. She needed me and I left her! So she threw
herself in the river!" 

Neil was hysterical. Miss Alice just looked at him, then at Margaret, saying nothing. Finally,
she spoke quietly, "Bring her inside, Neil." 

I was standing on the porch, but they walked by me as though I wasn't there. I couldn't speak
or move. I stood there for some minutes, barely breathing. I was only aware of the pounding of
my heart. I hadn't told Miss Alice about visiting Margaret at the Tea House yesterday. I had
encouraged Margaret to fight for Neil! If I had not gone to Neil's cabin today . . . or if I
had never interfered in the first place . . . 

I couldn't stand my own thoughts. I was overwhelmed with all that had happened. It seemed like
a nightmare. I walked stiffly down the porch steps then broke into a run. I ran through the
woods and across fields and into the woods again. I was aware of my breath rasping painfully in
and out, in and out. I took no notice of of the orange sun, low in the sky or of the deepening
shadows of the forest. I was blind to my surroundings. 

Finally, I could run no further. I leaned, exhausted, against the trunk of a pine tree and
tried to catch my breath. Oh, God! What was I to do? I could not think--sorrow lay in every
direction. So I poured out all of my anger and misery to God. I was furious with Margaret, with
myself, and with God. How could He let this happen? 

I had no idea how much time had passed, but when my anger was spent I realized it had become
full dark. I was in the woods, I knew not where, and a cold wind was beginning to blow. I had
run off without so much as a sweater and was now thoroughly chilled. I was exhausted, and had
received no comfort or peace from my talk with God. The thought of finding my way back to the
mission in the cold and the dark, tired as I was, was inconceivable. I sat down in the leaves,
my back against the tree, and pulled my knees close to my body for warmth. I sat there feeling
selfish and small and completely sorry for myself. "Maybe I should just go back to Asheville,"
I thought. "I am sure David would be glad to see me go after today. And there is nothing I can
do to comfort Neil or Miss Alice when I hate Margaret for her selfishness . . ." 

I felt a drop on my head, then another on my arm. Soon the rain was beating out a lively
pattern on the leaves all around me. I got to my feet and began to walk back the way I'd come.
I had to go slowly, feeling along the ground with my feet, so as not to trip over roots and
rocks. I kept my hands before my face, so I wouldn't walk into any branches. Soon I was soaked
to the skin, my teeth chattering with cold. I stumbled along this way for about an hour, but
could still see no lights from the mission house. I began to be terribly afraid that I was
lost. Then I heard a shout. A familiar voice called my name. I shouted back, overcome with
relief, "David! I'm here!" 

"Christy?" he called again. "Stay where you are and keep calling. I'll find you." 

"Okay, David." I answered. "I'm here, I'm right over here. . ." Soon I could see his bobbing
lantern coming towards me. As he approached, he held the lantern high, searching my face. 

"Christy! Are you alright?" he asked, full of concern. 

"I'm fine, David, I just lost my way." I told him. 

"Let's get you home." he said, taking my arm. 

I was so stiff with cold and weighted down with my wet skirts that I could only walk slowly.
Even with David's steadying hand, I kept slipping. Finally he said, "This is ridiculous,
Christy." and handing me the lantern he swung me into his arms. The wet cloth of his shirt
pressed against me. With David's long strides, it was not long before we came in sight of the
mission. As we got closer, a new wave of horror washed over me. Neil had carried Margaret in
just this way only a short time ago. I gave a violent shudder. 

"It's okay, Christy, we're home." David reassured me. His words filled me with the hollowness
of despair. If only I were REALLY home! 

When we reached the porch, David put me on my feet and opened the door. Miss Alice came towards
me, Fairlight just behind her. "Thank God!" Miss Alice said, putting her arms around me. "Let's
get you out of these wet clothes." She and Fairlight led me upstairs and I was soon in my own
bed, dry and warm. Too warm. I could feel the flush of fever upon my cheeks. 

Exhausted though I was, sleep evaded me. My mind was tumbling with too many thoughts. Miss
Alice and Fairlight asked me no questions, and shushed me gently whenever I tried to speak.
Their love washed over me like a wave. Love was here, here in Cutter Gap, here in this room,
for me! I scolded myself for running away, for trying to make God do things MY way instead of
seeking his will, for my lack of faith. Finally, with Miss Alice's cool hand on my forehead, I
fell asleep. 


Part 3 coming soon!