The Gift of the River ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SYNAPSIS: Like most fanfic, this story takes place where "The Road Home" ended. Written in episode format, the story attempts to fill in some unanswered questions from before the season ended, as well as give resolution to the series cliffhanger. I hope that it isn't too hard to follow, and I promise to provide the necessary reminders to help you keep up with the story line as it goes along. AUTHOR'S NOTES: I have tried to be faithful both to the wonderful novel Christy," as well as the series, in depicting our beloved characters, both in their personalities and manner of speaking. However, I will not attempt Dr. MacNeill's Scottish brogue. As Annie in her intro to "Fever" so wisely said, just close your eyes and imagine SFM's voice. I prefer not to mess with the real thing, so you'll have to supply a little imagination as you go. I promised myself that there would be no possum in this story, but you've got to go where the muse leads you...and unfortunately, for us, it involves possum. There's no accounting for good taste among the muses anymore! I am not a professional fiction writer by any means, so I welcome any and all critique and criticism. Hopefully, this will be a mutual endeavor, with all of you helping me to improve (hopefully) as I go along. Chapter 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Margaret stood speechless under the spreading tree branches at the edge of the river. Nearby on the porch of her husband's cabin, her bag and parasol stood confidently by the door. HER HUSBAND. It had been a long time since she thought of Mac like that. Again, as so many times before, she was alone, and he was gone, off to someone who he felt needed him more. This time however it wasn't a sick child or wounded man, but the young schoolteacher who had ridden away from the cabin just moments before. Margaret was shocked to hear from the other girls that the teacher had come to the tea house in El Pano to see her. Miss Huddleston had looked so hurt and wounded just days before when she unexpectedly showed up with her mother, Fairlight Spencer, and the other mountain women. Margaret had challenged Christy to stay, saying that she wanted to get to know her mother's new daughter. Neil however took Christy by the arm and led her outside. He returned inside and glared at Margaret. "How many people will you keep hurting, Margaret? Aren't your mother and I enough?" he shouted at her in his thick Scottish brogue. A sandy brown lock of hair fell across his forehead. Margaret stared at it intently, silent. He grabbed her roughly by the shoulders and fumed, "You don't care about anyone's feelings but your own, you never have!" Through the window over his shoulder, she could see the teacher running down the hill, her skirts clutched tightly in her hands. Christy Huddleston was exactly the type of daughter her strict Quaker mother had dreamed for, Margaret mused. Christy was beautiful, quiet, strong, and devoted to those around her and her God. She, on the other hand, detested people who patiently waited for God to reveal His ways, accepting whatever came with quiet resignation and simple faith. Christy was perfect for her mother and her "thees" and "thous," Margaret thought. She realized how much the teacher meant to her mother when she had returned last year. Standing on the bridge in the dark, something had awakened her mother, driving her to wander out into the cold night air clad only in her nightgown. Yet, she had not called Margaret's name, but Christy's. Margaret however triumphed at her new victory over the young teacher. Christy reminded her of a character in a new book she had read, Pollyanna. She was so morally upstanding it sickened her. She had dared to ask last year if anyone had called for her husband. She preached to her just as her mother had done. "They are perfect for one another," she thought, as Mac continued to yell at her. This time, Margaret had stood her ground and showed Christy that she was not weak. She still held power over Mac's heart, she gloated. Why else would he bother to stand there and scream at her like that? "Aren't you listening to me, woman?" Neil bellowed, as a sly smile slipped over Margaret's heavily powdered face. "Why Neil, I didn't know you cared," she said coyly. "I don't," he retorted. "I just want to know when you are going to stop coming here and upsetting everyone." "Everyone? Or just the schoolteacher?" Neil glared at her, his forehead wrinkling the way it did when he was worried about something...or someone. "Don't worry, Mac," she said, brushing a long curl from his face. "I'm leaving late tomorrow to go to Atlanta with the other girls. You'll have plenty of time to soothe the young schoolteacher's feelings once I'm gone." She stepped closer to him and snarled venomously, her green eyes blazing, "Just remember one thing. Why do you think that I married you? You were the perfect mate to a bastard child. A lonely, old mountain man, who believes in nothing and no one, including himself." And with that, she stormed off into the rear of the tea house. Neil stood silent, his face a mixture of pain, and anger. She hadn't changed, he thought. She always knew exactly what to say to hurt those around her the most. Deep down he knew that she was just speaking out of anger, to hurt him, but she had succeeded. Feelings of worthlessness rose up in him. He loved medicine and he loved his people, which is why he had turned down two big city offers following his medical schooling in Scotland. But too many good people in the Cove continued to die, despite his best efforts. He wasn't making a difference here. The memory of a soft and confused voice echoed in his ears, repeating those last words. Christy had said the same thing to him soon after she arrived in Cutter Gap. Alone in his cabin dressed in one of Margaret's old dresses while her wet clothes dried by the fire, she challenged him, noting that life in Cutter Gap remained hard, despite his best efforts to ease his people's physical pain. Shaking his head mournfully, Dr. MacNeill turned and wandered out of the tea house door, lost in his own thoughts. With the teacher now in the other room, Margaret quickly tidied herself up, smoothing her long, black curls and slightly wrinkled dress. She had found Miss Huddleston looking at her locket, with the pictures of her mother and Mac inside. Outside as she left, Christy had stood proudly with her head held defiantly high, like a protective lioness. "Dr. MacNeill is worth fighting for, so think about that before you end up old and alone," she proclaimed. Margaret needed Neil. Her tuberculosis had returned, after a brief remission, and Margaret needed money for treatments in Atlanta. More than that, she didn't want to die alone. That had been her life-long fear, and she knew that she could convince Neil somehow to be with her. She would tempt him to come with her to Atlanta. He still loved her, she knew it. She could make Neil finally leave that God-forsaken cove and return to a decent, civilized life, where he would not have to leave home several nights a week to remove bullets from men's bodies, or suture knife wounds. She had tried all of her old ploys--fresh flowers in a vase on the porch, the phonograph playing-- while she waited for Mac to return from fishing. He bounded up the stairs, a joyous smile on his face...until she greeted him at the door. But they hadn't fought like before. There was still hope, she believed. For a moment, while she held his jacket, gripping him tightly to her, she felt his reserve soften. He had leaned his head down against hers, while she quietly sobbed on his shoulder. Then Christy rode up, and the spell was broken. Mac, her dear Mac, raced after the schoolteacher, leaving her alone under a tree by the river. Chapter 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Margaret lied and told Neil that Christy was going to marry the preacher, but he raced after her anyway. Why? She had suspected that Christy had feelings for Mac when she struggled with her answer in the teahouse, but never had stopped to consider that Mac might also have feelings for the schoolteacher. "Perhaps while I was gone, he found her interesting," she mused. Certainly Christy was far more refined than any of the mountain women in Cutter Gap, and Mac wasn't interested in a mountain woman, she reminded herself. But Miss Christy Huddleston was no match for Dr. Neil MacNeill, Margaret concluded confidently. She was far too young and innocent to know what a man like Neil MacNeill needed. Anyway, Margaret was certain that Christy served merely as a poor substitute for his "dead" wife, even once she had returned last year. Despite his fuming and threats that she was dead to him, Neil had kept Margaret's wedding ring. She had found it in his laboratory, tied in a little bundle with her red scarf, which was draped on his lab desk. She twirled the dulled gold band on her slender finger and wondered what to do. She walked over to the porch steps, sitting down in a patch of sunlight, wrapping her long dark coat even closer around her as she felt a chill in the afternoon shade. "I'll just wait right here," she thought. "Neil will come back soon enough and I'll be able to convince him to leave with me to go to Atlanta. After all, my mother's little Pollyanna is going to marry the preacher." Christy galloped into the schoolyard on Prince, her fear of the large black stallion temporarily gone as she fled from Dr. MacNeill's cabin and the image of him holding his wife under a large tree. She leapt off Prince's back and quickly tethered him in the yard. David met her near the stairs, and held her, realizing that she was upset. "It must have been MacNeill," he concluded, as all of her schoolchildren stood behind him. No one else could make her that upset, he thought. He had planned on giving her the ring later in the day, after the end of classes, but realized that he needed to do it now. He, the Reverend David Grantland, was the right man for Christy. He had told Dr. MacNeill that just hours before at the river. MacNeill only brought her pain and confusion, and could offer her no future, while he was willing to give her what MacNeill couldn't--a happy life, marriage, children, God. Christy took the blue box and turned away from him, facing the outstretched valley floor in front of the schoolhouse. Hurt, and confused about her feelings, and what she had just seen at Dr. MacNeill's cabin, she stared at the ring, hoping that it would give her some kind of answer. Less than an hour before, she had sat with Fairlight and asked her how she knew that Jeb was the one. Instead, Fairlight had asked her some questions about the important people in her life--who was the first person she thought about in the morning, the last person she thought about before she went to sleep, and the person she counted on in a pinch. She had answered "David" to two of the first three, but blurted out "Neil MacNeill" when asked who made her blood boil because he made her so mad. She quickly explained that he was just a friend and that her response didn't mean anything. Fairlight continued, "Who is your best friend?" Christy looked away, not wanting to accept the answer ringing in her head. "Who do you tell your deepest thoughts to?" Christy turned to look at Fairlight, a sudden veil lifted from her heart. Fairlight noticed and stared at her, realizing too that Christy loved Neil. Christy had tried to deny it, but could no longer. She had wondered why she spoke to Dr. MacNeill, and not Miss Alice or Fairlight about David going to the teahouse in El Pano, trying to convince herself that Miss Alice was David's superior and that it would not reflect well on him. Fairlight was too upset about her husband, Jeb, going to the teahouse himself, that she would not be objective. So instinctively she went to Dr. MacNeill. She trusted him, and he made her feel better, he always did. Unlike David, who meant well…dear sweet David, he tried too hard. He wanted her to feel the same way he felt about her. But he never took the time to know what she thought or felt or dreamed about. He wanted to kiss her, not talk. She was the only eligible female for miles around, she decided, and David was lonely, far away from home, and in an element that he did not quite fit into. It was so much harder for David in Cutter Gap than it was for Christy. She naturally felt a part of these people, reached out to them without reservation, and they returned her affection. David struggled with himself, with his calling as a minister, with his God. Cutter Gap just wasn't as much a part of him as it was for Christy. The events of the last several days had made her start to realize what she had tried so hard to ignore. She loved Neil MacNeill. Margaret's question earlier at the teahouse about her feelings for him had startled her, as had Fairlight's questions. Now she stood holding a blue box containing a diamond engagement ring. What had seemed so simple, so clear less than an hour earlier, now seemed so muddled. She immediately went to the doctor's cabin. She needed to talk to him. She knew that she couldn't just blurt out that she loved him, he was a married man after all. She had no idea what she wanted to say, but she knew that she wanted to assure him that he was her friend, and very important to her, and that she wanted him to be happy. Margaret was his wife, and Neil obviously cared about her, despite the fact that she had faked her death in the river, and broken his heart. She had gone to the teahouse in El Pano to encourage Margaret to stay, to try to work it out with him and her mother. They both cared about her, and she was sure that Margaret must care about them. The pictures in the locket confirmed her suspicions, and she had told Margaret that Dr. MacNeill was worth fighting for. As she left the teahouse, she hoped that Margaret would not ignore her words. Dr. MacNeill's happiness, and Miss Alice's, meant everything to Christy, and she didn't want to see Margaret leave again without making an attempt at reconciliation. David stood behind her, waiting for an answer. Christy looked up as she heard the approaching sound of hoof beats. Neil galloped into the schoolyard, pulling his horse to a stop just yards away from where Christy and David stood. She looked at him, the afternoon sun creating a golden halo around his sandy curls. He sat on top of his horse, his back tall and erect, nervously twitching his hands as he waited for some response from the small form in front of him. Christy turned to look at David, and then realized that the children stood on the schoolhouse porch waiting to hear her answer to David's proposal. She had not noticed them there before. Her children. They looked up to her to do the right thing, and she realized how important it was that she remained above reproach. Bessie Coburn's lie had nearly forced her to leave the mission and Cutter Gap, and she realized that she must make the right decision, not just for herself, but for them. She turned one more time to look at Neil, sighing deeply, as the emotion of the last hour finally got the best of her, slowly eroding her facade of composure. Clutching the ring box even tighter in her hands, she started to speak, but the sounds were lost in her throat. David reached out to clasp her shoulder, but she gently pulled away, tormented, as she realized that Dr. MacNeill had once again interrupted her thoughts of a future with David. Neil had arrived unexpectedly at Ida and Clarence Sweetwater's wedding in that same yard, breaking her mental image of her marrying David. "Am I too late," he had asked. She looked up, startled to see him. His sandy curls no longer unruly, he was dressed in a fresh suit, with a small cluster of flowers at his lapel. "You're just in time," she remarked. Both then and now, she knew that he was a married man, and that she could never, would never, be with him, especially now that she had just seen him in the arms of his wife. She started to tremble, as she realized that one word would change her life, and all those she loved. Chapter 3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy knew she had to answer David, waiting expectantly in front of her. David, Neil, and her children were watching her. As she remembered all that had happened in the last few days and hours, she was overcome with emotion. She struggled to say something to David. She didn't know what she was going to say, but she had to say something. Again, the sounds were lost in her throat and she let out a pitiful gasp. For Neil, it was more than he could bear. He knew that he could not be with Christy. He had tried to accept that ever since Margaret had returned from the dead last year, but it didn't mean that it made it any easier. As much as he wanted to allow himself to love her, he was too honorable, too bound by everyone else's rules. He would never jeopardize her reputation in the mission or among the people of the Cove. But he cared for her happiness too, and it tore him apart to see her struggling with her words, trapped in the schoolyard by David Grantland. Unconsciously, he weakly called her name, afraid that he was already too late. At the sound of his voice, Christy's determination broke and a large tear ran down her face. Her entire body was racked by gentle tremors, and she fought to keep herself from sobbing. Fairlight had returned to the mission house after talking with Christy at their favorite spot on the mountain. She was beginning to hang laundry on the line when she heard the sound of galloping hooves. Christy had borrowed David's horse Prince, but Fairlight knew how tense she still was around the large black animal. Christy would never be riding Prince like that, she thought. As she looked up, she saw Christy charge into the schoolyard and jump off of Prince, running toward the schoolhouse. Fairlight dropped her laundry, not noticing that it fell into a mud puddle, and ran up the hill toward the school. Before she reached the top, Neil also galloped up, roughly reining his horse in just yards from Christy and David. Fairlight shook her head sadly, knowing that Christy's meeting with Dr. MacNeill had not gone well. They both looked concerned, and she wondered what had happened. As Fairlight reached the edge of the yard, she saw that Christy held a small blue box tightly in her hands, as she stood poised between the two most important men in her life. "Oh no, Miz Christy," Fairlight murmured. She knew that Christy cared for David, but after their conversation she realized, as did Christy, that her heart belonged to Neil. As she grew closer, she saw that Christy was trembling, and that a tear was slowly sliding down her face. She was trying so hard not to disappoint or hurt anyone, Fairlight realized, and felt her heart go out to the young teacher. She rushed past David and placed her arms comfortingly around Christy's small shoulders, placing the ring box in her apron pocket as she did so. Her protective nature got the best of her as her dear friend crumpled against her, like a child who needs comforting from its mother. "Why can't you men just leave her `lone for a while? Can't you see you're painin' her," she scolded them. With that, she slowly led Christy off past the yard into the meadow. David looked confused, staring at Christy's back as she walked away with Fairlight, and then shot one last glare at MacNeill before he turned and went back into the school. "Let's get back to our lessons, children," he said flatly, as he disappeared into the dark recesses of the schoolhouse. Neil felt as overwhelmed as Christy, as a flood of emotions washed over him. Had she agreed to marry the preacher? Why had she come to the cabin?...He turned his horse around and headed back home. He rode stiffly, lost in his thought. Almost there, he realized that Margaret still was probably waiting for him. He didn't want another one of her pathetic attempts at reconciliation, but steeled himself as he rounded the corner. Margaret sat huddled in the small patch of sunlight on the porch steps, waiting for his return. She saw him ride into the yard, the furrow still deep on his forehead, and his eyes distant, almost expressionless. She hadn't given too much thought to the possibility that he had genuine feelings for the teacher, but now that she saw him she began to reconsider it. "So when's the wedding," she responded sharply, easily returning to her self-protective demeanor. He brushed past her roughly, without saying a word or even looking at her, and headed straight for his laboratory. She rushed after him, afraid that he would lock himself in there all evening, as he had done so many times before, working until dawn. Neil gathered a few bottles from the counter, as well as several other medical supplies. Shoving them in his saddlebags, he stormed past her as he headed out the door. She vainly reached for his jacket, the brown tweed jacket that he often wore that smelled of pipe tobacco. He ripped himself from her grip and continued down the stairs, mounting his horse wordlessly and riding off in the other direction. Chapter 4 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy leaned heavily against her friend as she led her into the nearby meadow where they often sat and talked. Fairlight didn't speak, but held her arm tightly around her waist, murmuring soft sounds like she made to the children when they were afraid. Sitting down on the dry grass, she continued to hum to Christy, softly rubbing her back. Christy stared blankly at the mountains in the distance, overwhelmed with everything that had just happened. She wanted to tell Fairlight everything, to cry on her shoulder, but she was too ashamed. She had realized her feelings for Dr. MacNeill and had gone to speak with him instinctively, forgetting for a moment that he was a married man. She always trusted him, and for some time he had been the one that she confided to. She hadn't understood the reasons then, and she hated herself for understanding it now. "Oh, Fairlight," she gulped. "I'm such a fool." "Why, Miz Christy?" Fairlight paused. "Did ya go see Dr. MacNeill," she asked, hesitatingly. Christy nodded. "I don't know why I went there. I had no right to go. He's a married man, and Margaret is back, just a couple of miles away in El Pano. I didn't even know what I was going to say to him. I just knew how upset he was that Margaret was back. She's hurt him so much in the past, and I know that he still cares for her, in some way. Why else would he still have her shawl in his laboratory, or still sound so upset when he talks about how," Christy paused, "…how she pretended for so long that she was dead. I now realize that I…well, that he's more than just a friend to me." Christy blushed momentarily. "But I needed to tell him that I was his friend and that I wanted him to be happy, with Margaret." She paused, staring at the distant mountains. "That's why I told Margaret to stay and to fight for him." Christy paused as she wiped a drying tear from her face. "I guess she listened." "What?" Fairlight asked, confused. "Is Margaret back...in the Cove...with Neil?" "Yes, I saw them there, by the river..." Her voice drifted off as she stared into the distance again. They sat in silence for a while staring out at the mountains. It was late in the afternoon and the sky began to turn pink and orange. Dark fingers crept across the tops of the mountains, touching the tallest first, and then dropping gently down to the lower hills. Birds flew across the meadow, heading for the pine woods to roost for the night, and far away Christy thought that she could hear a morning dove. "Christy, it's getting late. I've gotta go home and get supper for the youngun's. Do ya wanna join us?" Fairlight hoped that giving her some time away from David, and Ruby Mae's incessant questions might do her some good. Christy started to shake her head and then remembered that she would have to explain herself at dinner. David would want an answer. Ruby Mae would want to know everything. Miss Alice didn't know that Margaret was back in the Cove, she realized. "Thanks, Fairlight, but I need to tell Miss Alice that Margaret is back. She should know that her daughter is here." "Don't ya worry, Miz Christy. I'll go tell her, I gotta put a few things away at the mission." Just then she remembered the laundry. "Wait here, Miz Christy. I'll be right back, and we can head on home." She left Christy sitting alone in the meadow as the sky grew a fiery shade of red. Christy looked up at the sky, and prayed for guidance. "Lord, I realized some things today about how I feel about Dr. MacNeill, but I want him to be happy. I know that he loved Margaret once, and maybe they can be happy again. Please, look out for him. I know that he says that he doesn't think that You play a role in his life, but I know that You do. Every time he operates or helps someone who is sick, it is You working through him. Let him find happiness with Margaret." Fairlight returned just a few moments later, and they walked together to the Spencer cabin. The early evening air was beginning to get crisp, and they pushed their hands deep into their pockets to help keep them warm. Fairlight jumped when she felt the small box in her pocket. She had almost forgotten that she had put it there before when they were in the schoolyard. "Miz Christy," she said hesitatingly. "I think this is yours." She handed the box toward Christy, who took it. Turning it over and over in her hands, Christy said, "Fairlight, what am I going to do about David?" Chapter 5 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ruby Mae was beside herself at dinner. Not only had she seen the preacher ask Miss Christy for an "understanding," but she had seen Dr. MacNeill ride up into the yard just a few moments later. Miss Christy hadn't answered the preacher, and Ruby Mae was dying to find out what was going on. She had made a "new and improved" version of her possum surprise complete with secret ingredients that no one wanted to know about. The boisterous redhead was an eager boarding student, even if she was still, months later, a rotten cook. "So, what da ya think?" she asked excitedly. David had pushed his rather generous helping around on his plate for so long that he now was forced to take a mouthful while Ruby Mae watched patiently. He grimaced as a dreadful, indescribable taste flooded his mouth. He swallowed quickly, hoping that he would taste it less. "Don't ya like the spider eggs I added? I found a whole nest of `em this mornin'." She grinned happily, convinced that her new recipe was a success, and bounded back into the kitchen to bring out another dish. "I warned thee about those spider eggs I saw on the porch this morning. I knew that they were not long for this world if Ruby Mae found them," Miss Alice whispered quickly to David. He managed a tense grin, and returned to pushing his lumpy potatoes around on his plate. "David, thee has been very quiet this evening. Is thee worried about Christy? She is having dinner with Fairlight and Jeb tonight." "Yes, Miss Alice. I'm fine. I just think that I'm coming down with something." David remained silent during the rest of the meal, and uncharacteristically excused himself from the table before Ruby Mae brought out dessert. "I've got a sermon to write. If you'll excuse me..." Miss Alice knocked on the door of his bunkhouse a little while later. David opened the door, his eyes rimmed in red. He quickly rubbed them, and mumbled something about being allergic to spider eggs. "I see..." Miss Alice pondered. "David, I would like to have an opportunity with thee. Would thee walk with me?" David nodded and slipped on his jacket, hanging by the door. They walked silently down the mission house stairs and headed toward the school. Once inside, Miss Alice said, "I wanted to speak with thee here, in private. I'm afraid Ruby Mae's prying ears might listen in and I want thee to feel free to speak honestly." "But Miss Alice," David sputtered, "I am always honest with you." "Why didn't thee tell me about what happened today...here," she said gently, waving her arm toward the open schoolhouse door and yard beyond it. "Miss Alice," David responded. "You knew that I was going to El Pano to pick up Christy's ring. I've been carrying that picture around with me for months now." "Yes, David, I know. But, what did Christy say? Thee seemed very quiet at dinner…" she said. Reaching out, Miss Alice put her gloved hand on his arm, "David, I am thy superior, but also thy friend. I feel that thee is troubled, and I wish to help, if I may." "I asked Christy to marry me. I took over lessons, as I always do, and she and Fairlight went together for a walk. Later, she later rushed back, and took Prince out for a ride. The next time I saw her, she raced into the schoolyard as if she had seen the devil himself. Then I told her that I love her, and asked her to marry me." David smiled wistfully, just thinking of her face. "Then MacNeill showed up," David scowled. "She just stood there between us, not saying anything...Finally Fairlight came up and scolded us for `hurting her' and put the ring in her apron pocket. Then they went into the meadow to talk." "She never gave thee an answer?" "No. I don't think that she loves me the way that I love her," David replied weakly. "That's what I want to talk with thee about David," Miss Alice said, her voice full of hope. "I've been thinking about thy relationship with Christy..." Chapter 6 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Margaret sat on the wooden bench by the river, staring at the moving water. She needed Mac, as much as she hated to admit that she needed anyone. "Why did I come back here," she thought. "I knew that the girls were coming here to El Pano. I should have known that it was too close, and that someone might see me and tell Mother and Mac that I was here. After all, I had gone to so much trouble to make sure that they didn't know where I was when I wrote to him the last time asking for money." She knew that her tuberculosis was getting worse. She had left Cutter Gap months ago before her mother could settle her affairs and leave with her to go for treatment. The coughing had gotten worse, and there were times when she had been in the middle of one of her "shows" when she began to cough so much that she couldn't continue. She had thought about going for treatments, but they were expensive and she didn't have the money. Mac had sent her money some months before, but she had used it to pay off debts that she had accumulated since she had left Mac and the Cove several years before. She looked down at her fancy city clothes, smoothing the wrinkles with her hands. "I don't even own the clothes on my back," she thought. For a while, she thought about leaving. Her bag was still waiting by the door, and her reception hadn't been anything like what she had expected, or dreamed about. Mother still didn't know that she was back in the Cove and if she left now, she could be far away before she ever found out. She couldn't go to Atlanta with the girls from the tea house. Neil knew and she couldn't take the chance that he would follow her. She loved him and needed him, but wanted him to suffer for the pain that he had caused her in their marriage. She knew that she was marrying a doctor from the backwoods of Tennessee, but she hadn't imagined his devotion to these people. Seeing him walking down Philadelphia's cobblestone streets late one day, his head bowed reading a medical text while he walked, she instantly felt intrigued by this man. He dressed more like a European gentleman farmer than the trendy formal clothes of most of Philadelphia's younger men. As he neared, she realized that he wasn't watching where he was going. She slowed her pace and loosened the grip on the bags that she was carrying, determined that she would remain unmoving directly in his path. He would bump into her, and from the looks of him, stop to help her. "Perhaps it's a little unfair," Margaret thought to herself, but she was a shameless flirt, determined to get what she wanted, and she didn't care what anyone thought of her. The handsome young man bumped right into her, upsetting her bags onto the rain-soaked street. Fruit spilled onto the ground, scattering in all directions. "Excuse me, miss. Let me get that." She noticed the Scottish accent right away and smiled to herself. He gathered the fruit, placing it in the bag, and handed it back to her. "I'm terribly sorry, Miss…." "Henderson," she replied sweetly. "Margaret Henderson." "Miss Henderson," he responded. "May I escort you to wherever you are going? I'm afraid that these bags are all wet, and you'll likely lose your groceries again before you make it there. It's the least I could do." "Of course," Margaret replied. "I'm on my way home. It's just a few blocks away. But on one condition…call me Margaret." She flashed him her sweetest smile, her bright green eyes sparkling, as she tucked her hand into the crook of his outstretched arm. She knew that Neil was mad at her. He had such a fiery temper at times, but she knew that once he calmed down, he would forgive her. "After all, he kept my rings," she commented out loud. "He told me in front of everyone at the mission that I was dead to him. But when I left him my rings and a note that I wanted him to forget me, to forget that I ever existed, he still kept them." She reveled in that last fact, and decided that she would take the teacher's advice…she would stay and fight for Mac. Miss Huddleston was naïve, Margaret thought, but she was right…Mac was worth fighting for…. Chapter 7 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Over the next several weeks, life in Cutter Gap was nearly unbearable for Christy. Ruby Mae never stopped chattering about wedding plans, and Christy didn't have the heart to tell the young girl, or David for that matter, that she knew that she couldn't marry him. He had purchased the ring before they had even discussed the matter further, even though she had turned him down before. She loved David, she knew that, but she just couldn't make herself feel the way for him that he wanted her to feel. Perhaps if he had given her some more time to push Neil MacNeill out of her mind, but more importantly out of her heart, she thought to herself as she stared at the blue box on her desk in the schoolhouse. She still hadn't given him an answer, but David had been uncharacteristically silent about the matter, which troubled her all the more. Outside David was working on the mission house, and she stared at his strong back as the muscles under his shirt strained with the weight of the board he was holding. "What are you thinking about Christy?" Her head snapped around quickly as she recognized Neil's voice. His blue eyes twinkled at her for a second, and suddenly it was gone. He continued, now serious and withdrawn, "I thought I'd stop by to see Alice. Margaret has been asking for her." Inside, Christy's heart tightened as she heard Margaret's name. Margaret had taken her advice, and was staying at the cabin with Neil. Perhaps they were finally mending their relationship, but it still hurt Christy to know that their friendship would never be the same. He was someone else's husband, and she would have to get used to it. "She's gone to Cataleechie to check on the children, but she said that she would return early tomorrow. Is Margaret worse?" Christy knew that Margaret's condition had only worsened since she had returned to the Cove. Her strength was slowly slipping away, and she couldn't walk very far unassisted, Miss Alice had told her. Christy had meant to go to visit, but she couldn't bring herself to do it, not yet, it was still too soon and the hurt was still too new. "Aye, I'm afraid she is." Neil turned stiffly toward the door, but Christy ran after him. Unconsciously, she placed her tiny hand on his arm to stop him. He flinched, but she didn't notice. "Neil, I'll go with you to see Margaret. I've meant to go before, but…" She stopped realizing that she could never explain why she hadn't. Neil squinted, trying to see deeper into her big blue eyes, to determine what she meant. For a second, he thought that he saw something there…a softness, concern…perhaps even love. He shook his head quickly, as if that would drive these thoughts out of his mind. "What are you thinking man? Your wife lying in your cabin now, dying and you're dreaming about Christy," he scolded himself silently. "No, Christy. I don't think that is a good idea," he said hoping that she would accept his answer. He could not bear being alone with her on the ride to his cabin, sitting just inches away from him, holding onto his waist so she wouldn't fall. He remembered how warm her body felt against his back when they rode together before, and again he cursed himself for breaking his promise. When he found Margaret lying motionless on the floor in a pool of blood after he returned from his unplanned trip to Low Gap, Neil felt consumed with guilt. He had been hurt that Christy had probably accepted the preacher's proposal, but even more so by the realization as he sat atop his horse in the schoolyard that there was nothing he could do about it. He wanted desperately to plead with her, "No, Christy. Don't marry David. I love you." But he was married and his wife was waiting for him at the cabin. Instead, he stormed past Margaret and headed off toward Low Gap. He wasn't due for a visit for several days, but decided to go anyway, just to put some distance between them. Secretly, he hoped for a moment that Margaret would be gone when he got back. He returned nearly a day and a half later and found the door to his cabin wide open. He climbed the stairs gingerly, trying not to make a sound as he grabbed a log from the pile on the front porch. Holding it menacingly, he entered the cabin, squinting to try to see better. Suddenly, he dropped the log with a loud thud. Margaret lay in a twisted heap near the fireplace, surrounded by a bloody pool. Turning her over, he noticed the blood was beginning to clot in her dark hair. Whatever had happened, it was recently. He gingerly examined her head and body for any wounds, and gently picked her up and carried her upstairs to his room. Laying her down on the bed, Neil realized that she must have had another coughing spell and had probably fainted from the blood loss. He wanted to send for Miss Alice, but didn't want to leave her until she regained consciousness. Slowly, Margaret's eyes began to flutter. "Margaret, it's me, Neil," he said softly. "Mac, I knew you'd come back to me," she said groggily. "Shhh, don't talk right now. Can you sit up? I'd like to examine you to see if you're alright." She obediently tried to push herself up on the bed, but her arms were too weak. Neil disappeared downstairs momentarily, bringing back his saddlebags. Opening them, he proceeded to examine Margaret. Later that evening, he left the cabin for a moment leaving Dan Scott to look after Margaret. Taking Miss Alice aside, he told her of Margaret's grave condition. Her tuberculosis was stronger than before, and Neil was afraid that she may not have many more months to live. Miss Alice began to cry, and inside Neil felt the sharp pains of guilt and self-hatred. Margaret had left the Cove because of him. He wasn't the kind of husband she needed, he thought. She was right, he had been more concerned with the people of the Cove than to the needs of his new wife. She wasn't used to these mountains and its primitive ways, and he had often forgotten that. How alone she must have felt all those nights while he was out tending to "his people." As he slowly rode back toward the cabin after speaking with Alice, he promised himself that he would do the right thing. He loved Christy Huddleston, but it didn't matter. He was married, and his wife was dying. No matter what it took, he would be a good husband to Margaret at the end. "Neil, I don't care. You need to rest, you're exhausted. I'll go with you and help with Margaret. Just wait for me while I saddle Prince." Chapter 8 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Let me help you saddle Prince, Christy." She spun around to quickly and looked up into David's beautiful eyes. Before, she would have expected to see confusion or frustration there at the thought of her riding off somewhere with the doctor. In the last several weeks however, he had changed. David hadn't pressed her into giving him an answer to his proposal. Instead, he seemed quieter, more contemplative as if something far greater were weighing on his mind. He and Miss Alice had taken to long walks after dinner, and sat together on the mission porch talking into the late evening. "Thank you, David," Christy responded. She thought for a moment and then continued, "David, Margaret is getting worse. Would you like to go visit her with me?" He nodded, and went to the stable to get a piece of sacking which he threw over Prince's back.. He mounted, and helped Christy up behind him. As she sat behind him on Prince, Christy wondered what was happening with David. He was so kind and supportive, just as he had been when she first came to the mission. Staring at his striped shirt stained by sweat, she secretly wished that she loved him. David was a good man… They followed Dr. MacNeill to his cabin, the trio silent, each lost in their own thoughts. David realized that the young teacher sitting behind him was troubled, and he reached back, comfortingly taking her hand. Christy acknowledged his friendly gesture by gently squeezing his callused fingers. As Neil dismounted his horse, he glanced back at David and Christy, riding silently into the yard. Her face looked peaceful, as if whatever inner demons she had struggled with earlier were now gone. Then he noticed that the Reverend Grantland held her gently by the hand. Dejected, Neil climbed the steps to his cabin, as David and Christy followed. "Mac," a woman's voice cried weakly from the room above them, "is that you?" "Yes, dear. I'm back. I brought Miss Huddleston and Reverend Grantland. They wanted to visit you," he said as he walked into the dark bedroom. Margaret lay in the bed, a small dark figure barely discernible in the near pitch-black room. He bent over her and gently kissed her on the forehead. "Margaret, you need to get some light and fresh air in here. It's a lovely day." He raised the blind and opened the window. A soft breeze caught the curtains, billowing them into the room. As Christy's eyes adjusted to the light, she saw containers of now-dried wildflowers filling the room. Although it was almost Thanksgiving, Neil must have searched the mountains for these flowers, gathering armfuls of the season's last blooms. Neil sat on the edge of the bed, facing his wife. Margaret's face was so very thin and her dark hair had lost much of its luster, but she had the inner glow of a woman deeply at peace, and in love. Christy stood silent and unmoving, speechless. David stepped closer to the bed, "Mrs. MacNeill, it's David Grantland, the preacher. Do you remember me?" "Of course, I do," Margaret smiled. "Please call me Margaret." Patting the bed, she said, "Please sit down. I'm so glad you came. Mother said she'd ask you to come by." David obediently sat next to her, taking her outstretched hand offered in greeting. He smiled, and glanced back at Christy. "Miss Huddleston, I'm so glad to see you. I wanted to thank you for what you've done for me." Margaret turned to look at her husband, her green eyes glistening. "Neil, how rude of us. Could you please get Miss Huddleston a chair?" Neil placed a wooden chair in front of Christy. She stared at him, confused by the sudden transformation in the doctor. As usual, his blue eyes revealed nothing, and she again wondered if she would ever truly understand what was in his heart. Returning to Margaret's side, he felt of her forehead. Satisfied with the results, he gently brushed a long dark curl away from her sunken face. "Miss Alice told me that you wanted to speak with me, Margaret," David said. "Yes," she replied weakly. "I have some questions about God, and death." "Margaret," Christy responded for the first time since entering the dark cabin, "I'll give you and David some time to talk privately. I'll stop by again another day." "No, Christy," Margaret said, reaching toward her. "Please don't leave yet. I'd like to speak with you. Gentlemen, could you excuse us for a moment?" Neil nodded, and the two men headed down the stairs. Upstairs they could hear muffled voices. Dr. MacNeill took his pipe from the mantle and gestured toward the porch. "Care to join me outside?" They stood together shoulder to shoulder on the porch, looking out at the river. Neil's sandy hair was beginning to curl over his ears and he absentmindedly ran his fingers through it, lost in thought. A trail of wispy smoke wrapped itself around him, as he struggled with what to say. "Grantland, I want to ask a favor of you." He turned to look at David, his blue eyes sad and pleading. "Please help Margaret. Alice has been talking to her lately, and," Neil paused, "it seems to help. I've done everything medically I can for her, and she's not improving. But after she talks to Alice, she has an optimism and hope that I cannot fathom." "Have you thought that it might be the work of God? I, better than anyone, have come to understand the healing power of His love," David responded. "I…I don't know about those things, Grantland, but whatever it is, I'm grateful. Margaret is more peaceful then I've ever seen her." He turned and looked toward the open door behind them. "Whatever it takes, Grantland, tell her what she wants to hear. She's afraid that she'll die and go to hell." David lightly placed his hand on Neil's shoulder. "Don't worry, Doctor. God is very forgiving, and I can see the change in Margaret, and in you. I'm sure He sees it too." Neil shrugged, obviously uncomfortable with David's comments. He mumbled something incoherently that sounded like "thank you" and focused intently on his pipe. He turned as he heard footsteps leading down from the cabin's second floor. Christy emerged from the dark cabin, her blue eyes filled with tears that threatened to spill over at any moment. "David, Margaret wants to see you now." David walked past her, giving her arm a comforting squeeze as he headed toward Margaret and Neil's room. Christy walked to the edge of the porch and leaned heavily on the railing. She exhaled deeply, and wiped a stray tear from her face. "Christy," Neil's voice sounded directly behind her, "it's late. Allow me to give you a ride back to the mission." "No, Dr. MacNeill," she responded, turning to face him, "I think I'll walk…" She started down the stairs, unable to look him directly in the eyes. Neil caught her by the arm, holding her so tightly that she winced. He loosened his grip slightly, but still held her, preventing her from leaving. He stepped closer, and Christy closed her eyes, breathing in deeply the smell of saddle soap and tobacco that encircled him. "Christy, I…," Neil started. He paused, choosing his words carefully. He gently wiped a tear from her face with his thumb, his palm lingering for a moment on her damp cheek. "It's for the best, Christy." She stared into Neil's eyes, a mixture of concern and pain clouding their blue depths. Dr. MacNeill had always been a mystery to her, but now she wondered if she had ever really known the cove's doctor at all. She nodded, and continued down the stairs and up the path leading toward the mission. Chapter 9 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thank you, Christy. You were right. Mac is worth fighting for." Margaret's weak voice echoed in Christy's ears as she walked along. Inside, Christy struggled with her emotions. She knew Margaret was dying, but she felt so hurt and confused about what she had just witnessed. Margaret loved her husband. Christy had realized that when she went to see her at the tea house in El Pano. But Christy was shocked by the change in Dr. MacNeill. He had forgiven Margaret, but until Christy saw them by the river she never thought that the stubborn Scot would accept Margaret back into his life. Neil MacNeill was many things, but being long-headed was at the top of the list. She felt betrayed, but scolded herself, reminding herself that Margaret was Neil's wife. As she walked, she sought spiritual guidance to help her accept the thought of the man she loved, but shouldn't, back with his wife. As she plodded along, a wave of calmness settled over her heart. Slowly, she found herself thanking God that Margaret had found her way and was now at peace with the Lord. Christy realized that she didn't know God's plan for Margaret or Neil, but prayed that they continued to be happy together. About an hour later, David knocked on Christy's door. "Christy? It's David. Can we talk?" She opened the door and followed him outside. They headed up the hill to the church as David suggested. He sat next to her on a bench in the dark church. "Christy, I wanted to talk to you about our visit with Margaret. She's very ill, and Dr. MacNeill says that there's nothing else he can do for her here." He paused. "She told me that she had been talking to Miss Alice about religion and she wanted to know if God would forgive her for her sins." He looked directly at Christy as he continued, "She was especially concerned about how she had failed Dr. MacNeill by leaving Cutter Gap, and especially while she was gone." Christy looked at David, trying to fully understand what he was trying to say. "I don't understand, David. Why are you telling me this?" "She wanted you to know how deeply sorry she is for the pain she caused Dr. MacNeill." "But," Christy stammered, "why does she want ME to know. Shouldn't she tell this to Nei…Dr. MacNeill?" "Christy," David said, gently taking her by the hands and looking deep into her big blue eyes, "she knows that you care about Dr. MacNeill." She quickly snatched her hands from his. "David, how could you say that? I'm Neil's friend, nothing more." David put his hand tenderly on her shoulder and turned her around to face him. "Just between us, Christy, don't try deceive yourself here in God's house. You love Neil MacNeill. It's so obvious that I can't believe I refused to accept it months ago. I tried to convince myself that the feelings you had were just compassion…I even told the doctor that." "What?" Christy screamed in shock. Her eyes were wild with confusion and fear. "It's alright, Christy. You're an honorable young woman. I never meant to imply that you had done anything wrong. We can't help whom we love, just as I can't help how I feel about you. I realized though, as I talked with Miss Alice about God's plan for my life, that I should be more like you. I should not just think about what or who was right FOR ME, but what was right in general. Margaret confirmed that for me this afternoon when she told me that you were the one who encouraged her to stay." Christy stood silently near the door. Her thin shoulders drooped with the weight of David's words. She felt foolish and terribly wrong. Here she was in the Lord's house, standing before a handsome young man who loved her with all of his heart. Instead, she loved a man that could never be hers. Chapter 10 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Oh, David," Christy sobbed, "I'm such a hateful person. I've prayed for guidance, but I don't know what I should do. How can God forgive me for this horrible thing?" "Christy, your actions have already shown that you have nothing to be embarrassed for. You selflessly put aside your feelings for the good of the MacNeill's marriage. I'm proud of you, Christy." He hugged her to him. She nestled her face in the folds of his shirt and wept. The next morning, Christy arose later than usual and slowly dressed for breakfast, too humiliated still to face David after their conversation. She descended the stairs slowly. But there he sat, alone at the table, a basket in front of him. "Good morning, Christy," David said, as he stood up, offering her his arm, "I thought you might enjoy your breakfast outside." She hesitatingly took his arm, following him outside. They rode silently to the meadow where Fairlight and Christy had found persimmons nearly one year ago. David helped her down from Prince, and spread a quilt on the ground, placing the basket of food in the middle. She sat next to him blushing violently, fearing that he would remind her of their conversation. To her surprise, he unpacked the same fine china he had used when they had taken tea together at the gazebo. Christy looked at him, a mix of confusion and embarrassment still clouding her face. "Christy," David began softly, "I hope you know how much you mean to me. I know that I've been stupid and immature in the past. But I've been praying on this and I know that with God's help I can become the man that you deserve. I know that you're the right woman for me. It doesn't matter to me how you feel right now about Dr. MacNeill. I KNOW that I can be the right man for you. I know how much you love the children. I want you to know that if you'll honor me by becoming my wife, I'll never ask you to leave Cutter Gap, unless you want to. Your happiness, Christy, means everything to me." He paused, taking her tiny hand in his and kissing it gently, "Christy Huddleston, will you marry me?" Chapter 11 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later that day, Christy slowly walked back to the mission. The gnawing pain in her stomach reminded her that she hadn't eaten since dinner the night before. Earlier, David had taken her for a picnic and proposed. She had been so shocked that she wasn't sure even now what exactly she had said. She remembered muttering something that seemed to satisfy David and then wandered off. She walked for miles it seemed, ending up near Jeb and Fairlight's cabin. Her friend had not been there so Christy continued to walk, oblivious to the time or where she was headed. The smell of cedar and decaying leaves filled her nose as she continued, growing closer to the mission house. Suddenly she felt an overwhelming sense of homesickness flood her. It was nearly Thanksgiving. She hadn't seen her parents in almost a year. She desperately wanted to be in familiar surroundings. The cove was her home, but she now felt more like a stranger than when she first arrived. She picked up her skirts and ran the rest of the way to the mission, her next course of action suddenly clear. The following morning, a bright fall Sunday in Cutter Gap, David awoke at dawn to put the final touches on the day's sermon. The Bible that the children gave him lay on his desk, a small blue box placed on top of it. He picked up the note tucked under it. "Dearest David, By the time that you read this letter, I will be gone. Don't blame yourself for my hasty departure. Too many things have happened lately. I just need some time away from the Cove to figure them out. I have asked Miss Alice to find a replacement for the rest of the school year…" David dropped the note to the floor, and rushed to the main part of the mission. "Miss Alice! Miss Alice!" David shouted, pounding furiously at Alice Henderson's door. She opened it, tightening her robe around her as she did. "David, what on earth…" "Miss Alice, it's Christy…she's gone," David choked. "What?" She stepped into the doorway, her foot brushing a small envelope lying on the wooden floor. She immediately recognized the schoolteacher's delicate handwriting. "They at sat silent around the table, their full bowls of Ruby Mae's oatmeal growing colder by the minute. "I ken't 'lieve Teacher would leave like that. Now how we gonna git schoolin'," Ruby Mae whimpered. She desperately loved Teacher. No one had ever made her feel so special, not even her own kin. "Ruby Mae, Miss Huddleston suggested that Cecile Carver, Daniel Scott's fiancée, teach in her absence. I think that is a fine idea," Alice replied. The Quaker woman was also confused by Christy's hasty departure, but attributed it to the approaching Thanksgiving holiday. She knew how deeply Christy loved her parents and this time of the year was especially dear to Christy's mother, Julia Huddleston. Perhaps Christy had been overwhelmed by homesickness… The train chugged its way ever closer to Asheville as Christy stared out of the window. She felt relieved that she was going home, but was reminded of another trip, the one that brought her to Cutter Gap. She had wondered then if she was running away for fun and adventure. She knew now that she was headed back for comfort and love. She told Miss Alice to find a replacement for the remainder of the school year, but privately Christy doubted that she'd ever return. Chapter 12 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next several weeks bustled with activity in the Cove. Daniel Scott had moved into the mission house following the fire at his cabin and was now awaiting the arrival of his fiancée, Cecile Carver from Freedom, Kentucky. The schoolchildren were enjoying their unexpected holiday, but missed Christy and wondered if they'd like the new teacher. Fairlight, Ruby Mae and Miss Alice lovingly prepared the mission and church for the upcoming wedding. Dan and Cecile planned to marry soon after she arrived in Cutter Gap, just one day away. The women wanted the wedding to be beautiful, as the young couple would not be able to have any family join them. Dan had asked Dr. MacNeill to be his best man, and he graciously accepted. He had doubted Dan's abilities as an apprentice, wondering if he'd ever fit in, but he had. Secretly, Neil was honored that he had asked him. Late one evening after Miss Alice finished visiting Margaret, Neil took her aside. "Alice, I can't do anything else medically for Margaret. I want her to go to the city for treatments. Perhaps they can do something for her there, but she refuses." "I know, Neil. Let's not force her though, Margaret will simply refuse all help we give her if we insist." Neil nodded in agreement. They stared into the darkness, and Neil finally spoke, "Alice, she wants us to renew our vows. She feels badly that we eloped and were married by a judge. She wants her friends and family to be there this time." "And what does thee want, Neil?" Alice asked, again lapsing into her tender Quaker speech. "I want her to be happy. If that is what she wants…" Alice placed her hand on his arm, stopping him mid-sentence. "Neil, thou hast been a godsend to Margaret. But thee cannot punish thyself for what happened before. Thee cannot marry Margaret before God. Yes, thou art her husband, but I know that thee feels bound to her by duty and honor, not love." "Alice, I do love her for what was. I've done everything in my power to be a good husband to her. I feel so terribly for causing her unhappiness before. Besides, she needs me now. Isn't that enough?" "No, Neil, it isn't. However, I won't stand in thy way, or Margaret's, if thee insists." In Asheville, Julia Huddleston placed the receiver back on the hook. She could never understand what her daughter saw in those primitive mountain people, especially Ruby Mae. That girl had absolutely no manners whatsoever. Christy wandered in from the library, a thin finger laced in the pages of a book of poetry by Robert Burns. Seeing her mother's worried face, she asked, "Who was it, Mother? Is everything alright?" Julia hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should convey the cryptic message. Christy had been uncharacteristically quiet about the people of the Cove since she arrived. However, she hated to lie to her daughter. "It was your student, Ruby Mae." "What's wrong? Is Margaret alright?" Christy asked, her voice filled with concern. "I believe so. She was so excited that I could hardly understand what she said. All I could gather was something about a wedding and Dr. MacNeill." Chapter 13 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Margaret lay in bed, too thin and weak to brush her hair or dress. She was having more difficulty breathing and she felt her life slowly slipping away. However, the past month had been heavenly. Despite her initial fears that Neil would never accept her, his attitude had changed dramatically after he found her after his trip to Low Gap. Unexplainably, her Mac had returned, the same gentle man who had lovingly placed her wedding ring on her finger all those years ago. For her part, Margaret attributed the change to Neil finally acknowledging his feelings for her, and her innumerable prayers that he would. She so wanted to be at the church to witness Dan and Cecile's wedding, but Neil insisted that she remain at home. Her mother offered to stay with her, but Margaret realized that she was the closest thing to family that Dan had in the Cove, especially since she had been present at Dan's birth. Instead, Fairlight Spencer had stayed, and was downstairs making an herbal tea for her. Neil stood tall at the front of the church, nervously tugging at the collar of his only good suit. He obviously felt awkward being in the church in front of all of these people. Somehow when he had been here for a presentation to Christy's class, the room hadn't seemed so stuffy. Christy. It had been weeks since he saw her last. It was probably for the best. She had such a look of pain and confusion on her face when she left his cabin, but he tried to convince himself that he was sparing her more hurt in the future. As much as he wanted to ignore it, he was married and would never betray his vows to Margaret or the promise that he made to himself. His eyes scanned the faces of the crowd, but she was not there. Christy sat alone on a wooden pew in the empty First Presbyterian Church of Asheville. Since Ruby Mae's phone call, Christy had been nearly silent, only speaking when spoken to, and offering no explanation for the cryptic message from Cutter Gap. The words "Dr. MacNeill" and "wedding" rang in her ears, and she had turned, weakly climbing the stairs to her room after her mother had given her Ruby Mae's message. She threw herself on her thick feather bed, burrowing her face in the crisp white linens, sobbing uncontrollably. The book of poetry lay beside her, open to the page she had been reading when the pone rang. She had been searching for a book in her father's library when she spotted the small leather- bound volume. It was beautiful. Pulling it out, she ran her fingers over the delicate gold embossing on the cover, a thistle. She turned it over several times in her hands, certain she had not seen it before. She carefully opened it, and on the marbled endpiece read: "To William, with all good wishes for a speedy recovery, Neil." Dr. MacNeill had given this book to her father? She opened the volume to the title page, noting that it was a copy of selected poems by Robert Burns. She held the book gingerly to her nose, and smiled wistfully. It smelled ever so faintly of Neil's pipe tobacco. Neil had given her father HIS own copy. How very like Neil to think of someone who was ill and share with them one of the things he held dearest. She settled herself into the large wing chair near the fire, curling her feet under her. As she read, she could hear the melodious sound of Neil's brogue. She turned the pages and read something that sounded familiar: Till a' the seas gang dry, my dear, And the rocks melt wi' the sun: O I will love thee still, my dear, While the sands o' life shall run. And fare thee weel, my only luve, And fare thee weel awhile! And I will come again, my luve, Though it were ten thousand mile. Where had she heard that? She closed her eyes, lightly drumming her temples as she tried to concentrate. Suddenly, her eyes flew open as she remembered. During the long, sleepless nights tending to the children during the scarlet fever outbreak, Christy had fallen asleep as she sat on the schoolhouse porch. She was physically and emotionally exhausted. All of the children were quarantined at the mission. Ruby Mae had just developed the characteristic high temperature that foretold the fever's onslaught. She awoke, groggy as if she were surrounded by a fog so thick that neither light nor sound could pass through. Slowly the fog cleared and she could see the shape of a man in front of her. His voice was soft and tender. David? The fog thinned some more and she recognized the man as Dr. MacNeill. What was he saying? She strained to understand the words as they flowed like a gentle melodic river around her. "Till a' the seas gang dry, my dear, And the rocks melt wi' the sun…" Christy was nearly awake now, but she couldn't understand. Why was the doctor's voice so different? So filled with emotion? Was he worried about the children? His voice continued, "And I will come again, my luve, Though it were ten thousand mile." She opened her eyes, and saw Neil MacNeill staring at her, his eyes brimming with tears. Since the phone call, she had sought faith. Her heart ached, but she knew that Neil's place was with Margaret. She again turned to prayer, the source of so much comfort during her time in the Cutter Gap. Slowly, her heart was beginning to heal. She felt God's love washing over her, again reminding her that He cared, as she sat alone in the empty church. ~~~~~~ Poem in this chapter of "The Gift of the River": "A Red, Red Rose" by Robert Burns. Chapter 14 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Neil raised his cup of cider in a toast to the new couple. "Cecile and Dan, may you remain each other's dearest friend. Here's to the bride and groom." A cheer went through the crowd gathered in the mission parlor. He made his way through the crowd to Alice Henderson's side, as Cecile and Dan cut their wedding cake. "A lovely wedding, Alice," he said as he raised the cup to his lips. "You and the other ladies did an outstanding job." "Why, Neil," Alice teased, "a fine compliment such as that coming from you? We should have weddings around here more often. They make you downright sentimental." Neil laughed heartily. "Frankly, I'm surprised not to see Christy here. I know how fond she is of Dan Scott." "You don't know, do you?" He wheeled around to face her, his eyes troubled and forehead wrinkled with concern. "She's all right isn't she? I mean you would have called for me if she were ill…" "Neil, she's gone home to Asheville." "For the holidays, you mean?" "No, I'm afraid it is for good. She asked me to find a replacement for the remainder of the school year. That's one reason why Cecile's here." He turned from her, his forehead deeply set with furrows. "I cannot fathom this," he mouthed, disappearing out the front door. He mounted his horse and kicked him sharply, galloping furiously in the opposite direction. Dr. MacNeill rode aimlessly, trying to clear his thoughts and erase what he had just heard. He had tried to be a good husband to Margaret, and had even agreed to renew their vows in church, but he couldn't change his heart. He had tried to convince himself that what he was doing was right, but it didn't make it any easier to forget Christy. Now, she was gone. The sky grew darker and Neil knew he had to return home. He slowly turned his horse toward the cabin. Fairlight was inside near the fire when he arrived. "How is she?" "She's sleeping now. All tuckered out, but the herbal tea I made did the trick." "Thank you, Fairlight." "Neil, are ya all right? Is somethin' a troublin' ya?" "Nay, Fairlight. It's just been a long day. I was out until late with the McHone infant. Seems she's got a bit of the influenza." "Neil MacNeill, I've known ya since we was kids. Somethin's a troublin' ya." Neil nodded and led her out onto the porch. "Aye, it is. Why didn't you tell me that Christy had gone back to Asheville?" "Well, I thought on it, but decided not to. You've been so plumb wore out with Margaret and your usual doctorin' that I didn't want to worry ya." "Fairlight," he said pleadingly, "how could you let her go when I need to tell her…" "There ain't nothin' ya can tell that girl that she don't already know in her heart." Neil looked at her quizzically, but Fairlight just smiled. Chapter 15 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ For Christy in Asheville, the weeks following Thanksgiving were filled with one meaningless party after another. Christy dutifully attended numerous afternoon teas and other holiday parties. She didn't want to disappoint her mother who reveled in having her daughter home again. It was easier for Christy to put on an act, pretending to enjoy the senseless social calendar, than to explain to her parents why she had really fled Cutter Gap. "Miss Huddleston, your mother tells me you worked at a backwoods mission. I think that's fascinating. Please tell me more about it." The young man, introduced to her just moments before, looked much like John Spencer--tall, blonde hair, blue eyes. However, his new navy wool suit was freshly pressed and he distinctly smelled of men's cologne. John Spencer's clothes were often thin and threadbare, she thought to herself, wishing that she were talking to him instead. Christy instinctively flashed him a smile, her blue eyes masking any trace of disinterest or sadness. "Mr. Randolph, how lovely to meet you. Mother has spoken so kindly of you." She glanced at her mother who stood chatting with some other ladies. Her mother had described Thomas Randolph III as young, handsome, and very eligible, not to mention an heir to the Randolph's Department Store fortune. Julia Huddleston suspected that either Reverend Grantland or Dr. MacNeill was behind Christy's willing return to Asheville. Only weeks before, Christy had called home, insisting that she couldn't leave the mission until the summer break at the earliest. She hoped that the remaining Christmas holiday and New Years' parties would distract Christy, giving her a chance to socialize with Asheville's younger circle. Christy politely excused herself after they arrived home. She sat in front of her cherry dressing table, staring at the image reflected back at her. She slowly brushed her hair, wondering what the people in Cutter Gap were doing. She smiled wistfully as she ran the brush through her hair, remembering how Ruby Mae yelped when the young teacher brushed her hair. "Ooowww, Miz Christy! Do ya have'ta brush ma hair? Why ken't I jus' leave it like it `tis?" Fairlight. She hoped Cecile was continuing with her reading lessons. Little Burl. Christy smiled sadly as she remembered his greeting on her first day, "I come ta see ya and ta swap howdies." A gentle knock sounded at her door. "Christy? It's Mother." Christy opened the door. "Honey, Elizabeth said this came for you this afternoon." She handed Christy an envelope. "Good night, dear. Sleep well." She recognized the delicate, yet shaky feminine script, but wondered who in Philadelphia would be writing to her. The only person she knew from Pennsylvania was Miss Alice. This was definitely not Miss Alice's handwriting but there was something familiar in the slant of the letters. Chapter 16 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy slid the silver letter opener along the envelope and took the note out. She sat down in the overstuffed chintz chair near the window, hooking her leg under her as she nestled against the upholstered back. Her long honey-colored hair fell in cascades over the letter as she read: December 19 Dear Christy, I'm sorry that I haven't written to you before. I wish I could say that I am improving, but the doctors say that the tuberculosis is far too advanced. Frankly, they are surprised that I've survived this long. I know that it was God who gave me the strength to live until I had mended things between my family and me. Nevertheless, I have come to accept my fate. Mother has helped to show me that I do not have to fear death. I never thought I would feel so at peace. I wanted to thank you again for what you did for me. I know that you didn't have to encourage me to stay or try to resolve my relationships with Mother and Mac, especially since you know how much I hurt them by leaving the Cove. The past two months have meant the world to me. I can't undo the hurt I've caused them both but… Christy finished the letter and sat gazing out at the lightly falling snow, again amazed at the difference God's love could make. Margaret lay dying in a Philadelphia hospital, yet she still thought of Miss Alice, Dr. MacNeill, and Christy. ~~~~~~~~~ Dr. MacNeill placed his equipment back in his saddlebags. "Opal, Tom, I'm pleased to tell you that your daughter is doing wonderfully. Her bout with influenza had had no ill effect on her health. There's no sign of congestion in her lungs." He smiled, as he gently caressed the little girl's hair. If all of his visits would go so well, he thought wistfully. Back in his empty cabin, he again read over the letter Margaret had written two weeks before: December 5 Dearest Mac, Don't be angry with me for leaving without telling you. I finally agreed to go for treatment. I know it's probably too late, but I can't refuse Mother any longer. Please don't try to come after us. I know that you are needed here. Besides, there is nothing more you can do than you have already done. You gave me the chance to try and undo some of the pain I caused you. But more than that you gave me the opportunity to finally do the right thing by you. I will never forget how sweet you were to me. It was almost as if I had never left and we were still happy and in love. But I know Mac that our love was over long before I left the Cove. You tried to make me believe that it was different this time, but I know that you only wanted me to be happy. I know that I am not the person you hold in your heart. Before I found God, I would have been angry with you for "betraying me," but I know that you'd never break the vows we made. You're too noble to ever do that. But it's just as wrong for you to be bound to a woman you no longer love. So I am asking you to grant me one last wish--to find Christy and tell her how you feel. I know you love her Neil, and I'm certain that she cares for you a great deal. Don't think that you did something wrong to make me think this way. Every moment you were awake you made me feel safe and loved. You just couldn't help the things you allowed yourself to feel when you were asleep. Late one night, after Dan and Cecile's wedding, I heard you call Christy's name after you fell asleep downstairs. … Neil crumbled the letter in his fist, unable to read any more. Chapter 17 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Huddleston's phone rang late one evening two days after Christmas. Christy picked up the receiver, "Hello, Huddleston residence." "Christy?" The voice on the other end was distant, but familiar. "David?" "Yes, it's me. I'm sorry to disturb you so late. I wouldn't have called unless…" She recognized the concern in his voice and grew frightened. "David, what is it? Is everyone all right?" "No, Christy. I'm afraid it's Miss Alice." "No!" Christy shouted in despair. "No, no. She's not hurt physically. She just returned from Philadelphia this afternoon on the train. Margaret was buried yesterday. I think that Miss Alice could use you here." ~~~~~~~~~ Her father stood with her on the train platform as the snow continued to fall in the cold pre-dawn. "Little miss, are you sure you shouldn't wait until later? This snow doesn't look like it will stop anytime soon." "No, Daddy. Miss Alice needs me right now. It's the least I can do." He hugged her tightly and kissed her gently on the forehead. ~~~~~~~~~ David was waiting for her as she stepped off the train at El Pano. He held his arms open and she willingly stepped into them, much as she had when she first arrived at the mission house with Ben Pentland. David led her toward where he had hitched Prince. They plodded through the snow back toward the mission as David explained the events of the past several days. As Christy already knew from her letter, Margaret had agreed to go to a hospital. She insisted on going alone with Miss Alice, not to Atlanta or Asheville, but to Philadelphia. She wanted to be near her childhood home, she said. Amazingly she survived the trip to Pennsylvania, but Margaret had waited too long. The doctors were able only to make her last days as comfortable as possible. Just three days earlier, Margaret Henderson MacNeill had taken her last breaths. She was buried next to Miss Alice's parents in the family plot in Ardmore, as she had requested. Without even so much as a call while she was gone, Alice Henderson returned from Philadelphia alone. Margaret, she had said simply, was finally at peace. She lapsed into one of her Quaker silences, remaining in her room, reading the Bible and praying. It was clear to all at the mission that she was grieving her daughter's death. David decided to contact Christy in Asheville in the hope that she would be able to ease Miss Alice's pain. Ruby Mae leaped from her chair as Christy came in through the door. "Oh, Miz Christy! We thought you'd never come back," she squealed, hugging her around the neck. Christy returned her hug and looked up the stairs toward the second floor. "Is Miss Alice in her room?" "Aye, Miz Christy. She really needs ya now, bad." Christy nodded and climbed the stairs leading to the mission's upper floor. She knocked gingerly on Miss Alice's door. "Thank you, Ruby Mae, but I'll not be joining you for lunch today," a voice answered from the other side of the door. "Miss Alice, it's Christy." The door flew open and Miss Alice stood before her in a fresh black shirtwaist and skirt. Her hair was pinned in a characteristic bun, but her face carried the look of someone who had lived years in just the past several weeks. "Oh, Christy! Child, I am so happy to see thee!" The Quaker woman smiled and hugged her tightly. She directed Christy to a seat near the mission's upper porch. "I am glad that you are here, Christy. I know that by now you must have received Margaret's letter." Christy nodded in surprise. "So you know that she finally came to know God. I realize that my sadness is selfish. Margaret is finally at peace and we should rejoice in that." She smiled faintly and sat down on a chair near Christy. "I do think that your return to Cutter Gap is a blessing. Not just for the children or me, but for Neil as well. He needs you now, Christy." Chapter 18 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy knocked on the door of the doctor's cabin. Miss Alice had told her that she was worried about Dr. MacNeill's reaction to Margaret's death. David told Miss Alice that Neil had telephoned repeatedly to numerous eastern hospitals, trying to find out where Margaret had gone for treatment. Unsuccessful in his search, Dr. MacNeill became withdrawn, gruffly going about his job in the Cove, but avoiding the mission altogether. After Alice returned alone from Pennsylvania, Neil was uncharacteristically calm. They heard from Fairlight and Jeb that his usual bluster was absent yet no one at the mission had seen him since Alice's return. Receiving no answer, she pushed the door open. "Neil? It's Christy. Are you here?" She heard a clattering sound in his laboratory. She stood outside the closed door, reminded of another time she had tried to comfort him. "Neil, I know that you are in there. Please, I want to talk to you." She waited and received no response. "Neil, I'm so sorry about Margaret. But she's with God now and she'll never be in pain or sad again." The door flew open and Dr. MacNeill stood in the doorway, his hair tousled and several days' growth of beard covering his face. He looked as if he had slept in his clothes and smelled strongly of alcohol. "So tell me, Miss Huddleston, all about your merciful God. I'm afraid I can't understand Him." He was obviously drunk and shouted at Christy, flailing his arms in anger. "Neil, please. I want to help you. I am your friend and I care about you." "Oh, so you care about me, do you? I thought you were smarter than that, Miss Huddleston. I destroy everything I touch. Just leave me alone and go back to the Reverend Grantland. I'm sure that he's overjoyed that you're back." He turned wobbly on his heels and retreated into the dark laboratory. Christy paused for a moment, still reeling from his angry outburst, but she firmly set her shoulders and followed him. "Neil, be angry if you want. Hate Margaret's death, hate me, but don't hate yourself or God. You did everything you could for Margaret both as a doctor and her husband." Behind him she could see his laboratory in disarray, broken bottles scattered on the shelves and floor. Several empty jugs of moonshine lay on the desk by the window. He ignored her and tilted a stoneware jug to his lips, drinking deeply and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He glared at her defiantly, but the young schoolteacher held her ground. "Neil, you're not going to get rid of me that easily. Please, let me try to help you. I know that you're upset about Margaret, but you can't shut everyone else out." She stepped closer, laying her hand on his sleeve and looked pleadingly into his troubled blue eyes. "I want to help you. I am still your friend, Neil." He looked down at her through bleary eyes. She pitied him and it made him furious. He didn't deserve anyone's compassion or friendship. He had hated Margaret for returning, but promised himself that he would make her final days happy, to give her the peace she so needed. The guilt that he had not encouraged her to stay when she returned the first time, even though he knew that she had tuberculosis, haunted him. But she came back again. Yet, it wasn't love that made him try to be a husband to her again in her last days, but guilt. But he was just going through the motions. In the end the feelings in his heart for Christy had been his downfall. Like so many times in his life, his best efforts were not enough. He roughly gripped the small hand on his arm and pushed Christy away. She staggered back, trying to steady herself as she stumbled on the debris littering the floor. Slowly, as if he were unable to react, he watched as Christy fell to the floor, hitting her head against the long wooden lab table. Neil rode into the mission yard, Christy's limp body cradled against his own. David, Ruby Mae and Miss Alice rushed out to meet him, each peppering him with questions. Neil handed Christy over to David and steadied himself against his horse as he dismounted. Alice noticed his unsteady movements and scolded him, "We could use your assistance now, doctor, but unfortunately you are in no condition to help." He leaned his head weakly against the saddle. "Ruby Mae, please go get Dan Scott. He should be working on his cabin." The young girl nodded and took off running. As Alice noticed the blood staining Neil's shirt she shouted after her, "And tell him to hurry!" Alice Henderson quickly rushed upstairs to attend to Christy's injuries. Neil leaned heavily against his horse, draping his arm over the animal's back. He wanted Christy to leave him in peace, to stay as far away from him as possible, but he never meant to hurt her. Fairlight checked upstairs to see if David or Miss Alice needed her help and then headed out to talk to Neil. Slumped against his horse, he looked more tired and haggard than she had ever seen him. As she neared, she noticed the distinct smell of moonshine. The doctor occasionally drank, but never like this, to excess. "Neil, come inside and let me get ya some coffee. Miz Christy'll need ya." He nodded and obediently followed her into the mission. After his second cup of black coffee, he ran his fingers through his hair and shot a plaintive look up the stairs leading to the second floor. "Fairlight, this is all my fault. She came to see me. She was concerned about me…and I pushed her away. I didn't want to hurt her, but she slipped and hit her head on the table. She just lay there, Fairlight, so quiet and peaceful, like a doll. It scared me how much she looked like that time after the schoolhouse fire. Then," he buried his face in his interlaced fingers, "I could help her, but now…" "Neil MacNeill, this ain't ye'r fault. I know ye'd never hurt Miz Christy. It's jus' ye've taken on a burden that's more'd any man can handle hisself. First, ye blamed yer'self fer Margaret getting' so sick and then ye went `round here actin' like nothin' ever happened a'tween ya both. When Miz Christy left ye walked `round like a ghost. Neil, stop tryin' to punish yerself. Ye care for that girl an' there ain't no `mount o' liquor that can make it not so. Now, drink up!" She thrust a cup of coffee at him and headed upstairs to check on Christy. Dr. MacNeill met Dan Scott at the bottom of the stairs. "Dan, how is she? Is she conscious?" "She's got a laceration on her skull, but it's stopped bleeding and she won't need sutures. She's not dizzy, but I don't want her to sleep yet until we can be sure it's not a concussion. Frankly, I'm glad you're feeling better because I could use your opinion on this one." He patted the doctor on the shoulder and followed him up the stairs. Dan paused before the door to Christy's room. "I'll give you a few minutes. She's been asking for you." Neil gingerly opened the door. "Christy, it's Neil. May I come in?" Chapter 19 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy sat in bed, several fluffy pillows behind her back. She smiled softly at Neil as he entered. Although he was normally very self-assured, Neil suddenly didn't know what to do. Should he sit or stand or what? Christy motioned for him to sit in the chair by the bed and he meekly complied. This was all his fault and he suddenly felt ashamed to even be there. "Neil," Christy asked, her voice filled with concern, "are you all right?" He felt so utterly embarrassed. He had caused this to happen and yet she was concerned about him. "Christy, I…this is all my fault. I am so sorry. I can't believe that you're lying here hurt because of me." He reached out to hold her hand, to somehow let her know how deeply sorry he was. She stared at him, looking deeply into his eyes as if she were almost looking right through him. Her gaze was so intent that for a moment he almost forgot why he was there. "Dan asked me to examine you." The doctor edged closer, checking her eye responses for any sign of concussion. He then instructed her to turn her head so he could examine the cut. As he gently brushed her hair aside, he noticed the one-inch gash now clotted with blood. He felt weak. He had been a doctor for years and in the backwoods of Tennessee's mountains he had seen far worse. But to know that he had been the cause of it… Christy turned to look at him, her faces just inches away from his. He still smelled faintly of liquor and his red-blonde beard prickled against her hand as she gently touched his ashen cheeks. She had never seen him so full of hate as she had before at his cabin, but there was something in his eyes that she recognized. She had seen it there before a few times--by the river on a moonlit night, on the schoolhouse steps during the fever outbreak, when they walked together in a meadow and he had placed a ring of flowers in her hair…and now. She reached up, wrapping a stray curl around her finger. She loved him. How she had gone so long without realizing it she didn't know. When she realized, she cursed herself for feeling that way, knowing that he was married. As always, she focused intently on the children. Thankfully, her work allowed her no time to think about her feelings for Dr. MacNeill. She had fled Cutter Gap hoping that familiar surrounding in Asheville would help her forget. But they hadn't. As she stared into his eyes with their tiny flecks of color like the sun glistening off a river, she realized what Neil needed. She swung her feet to the floor and stood up. Neil caught her arm to steady her. "Where do you think you're going? You've just had a nasty bump on the head." "No arguments. Come with me." She led him down the stairs by the hand, past a bewildered David, Miss Alice, Dan, Ruby Mae, and Fairlight. They turned to look at one another, but no one offered any explanations. They walked together through the frozen forest. The previous day's snow had melted turning the ground slippery in spots, but clumps of snow still rested on the evergreen branches. She plodded on down a well-worn path oblivious to everything around her except Neil. He started to ask where they were going or why, but something about the determined set to her shoulders made him stop. He shook his head. God, but she was stubborn. As they rounded a bend, he realized that they were near his favorite fishing spot. Just several months before, he had brought Christy here when she had been upset about seeing David at the teahouse. They reached the edge of the river and stopped. Christy turned to face him, her bright blue eyes gleaming. "Neil, I want you to know that I am your friend. I care about you very much and I want to help you." "Christy, of course I know that, but why did you bring me here? It's cold and you just suffered a nasty fall. You shouldn't overexert yourself." "Do you remember when you brought me here?" He nodded. "That day I was upset and you showed me this spot." She looked over her shoulders toward the river, the fading light dancing off the surface of the water. "You brought me to this place of peace and solace. You gave me the gift of the river. Now, I want to give it to you." He looked down at her, her hair falling in loose cascades around her shoulders. The look on her face was one of complete joy, uncomplicated and innocent. He instinctively took her hand and raised it to his lips, gently kissing it. They sat together on a fallen log for over half an hour, not talking, just watching the fading light dance along the surface of the river. Finally, Neil spoke. "Christy, I need to talk to you, about Margaret. I feel so guilty that I had mourned her for so long but that when she came back, I rejected her. I knew she had tuberculosis, but I didn't ask her to stay. When she found her rings, I guess she thought that it meant that I still loved her. But I didn't, not the way a man is supposed to love his wife. Then when I found her on the floor, I hated myself. So, I tried to be a real husband to her. I pretended that everything was normal, but I couldn’t love her the way she wanted. She said that I called your…" He stopped, the words just wouldn't come. He had buried these emotions deep in his heart for so long that he didn't think that he could say them. "She said that you called my name, didn't she?" Christy asked, hesitatingly. He looked at her, startled. "What?" Christy pulled a wrinkled note out of her pocket and handed it to him. He opened it and recognized Margaret's handwriting. Silently, he read the note. "Well, that explains it…" he muttered to himself. "Explains what?" "After that night, she never mentioned anything else about us renewing our vows." "So then you never did? But Mother told me that Ruby Mae called and said mentioned something about you and a wedding." He smiled faintly, his forehead still wrinkled with guilt. "Aye, but it was me standing up for Dan Scott." Christy felt her heart flutter in her throat but fought it back down remembering that Margaret had died only days ago. Reaching out for the note that he held loosely in his hands, she continued, "She wanted me to come back to Cutter Gap. She said that you needed me. Do you, Neil?" "Christy, I care about you. You're my dearest friend. Despite all of my criticism to you since you came here, I admire anyone who has a dedication to the Cove." "Neil, you don't have to protect me from you. I am not asking for anything more than to be your friend. I just want to help you the way that you've helped me so many times before. You're not a bad person. You don't destroy everything you touch. You're not going to hurt me." "But I already have. I don't deserve anyone's compassion or pity," his voice resuming its gruffness. "I don't pity you. And you do deserve compassion and friendship. You're a wonderful man, Neil MacNeill, and a dedicated doctor. You have helped so many people here in the Cove. Bob Allen. Little Burl. Becky O'Teale. Lundy Taylor and his father. David. Miss Alice." She paused, looking at him, "And me. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't helped my father. I was so afraid that I'd lose him. I sat next to him on the bed and begged him to come back to us. I told him that there were so many things he needed to do- -to give me away at my wedding, to play lions and tigers with his grandchildren on the floor in front of the fire, to let them get oatmeal all over his vest." She smiled softly, her eyes watering as she remembered. "You gave him back to us. You have helped me so much, Neil. Yes, you've challenged me, but you've pushed me to be a better person, to not think of things in black and white. Please, I wish you could see yourself the way I see you." She took his hand, squeezing it tightly as if by her touch she could convince him. Chapter 20 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Neil smiled weakly at her. He wanted to disagree, to tell her how unworthy he was of anything good, to tell her about all the times he had failed as a human being and doctor. She was so stubborn when she set her mind to something and right now he didn't feel up to an argument. "It's getting dark. Let's get you back to the mission and in bed where you belong." His voice was all seriousness, but there was a tinge of melancholy to it as well. "All right," she answered, picking up her skirts and heading up the slope, "but you're not going to get rid of me that quickly. You're stuck with me, Neil MacNeill, and that's all there is to it." He shook his head again, but quickly followed her up the path back toward the mission. All eyes were on the pair as they walked into the mission house. Christy's face bore a look of determination that confused them. Neil, on the other hand, looked tired and a bit baffled. Fairlight grinned knowing that whatever they had talked about Christy had won at least that round. Later, again tucked into her bed, Christy poured over the Bible in front of her looking for passages that would somehow give her guidance. A gentle knock sounded at the door. "Come in," she answered. "How are you feeling, Child?" Miss Alice asked. "You had a nasty bump on your head. Are you feeling dizzy?" "No. I'm much better, thank you." "Even after your impromptu walk this afternoon?" Miss Alice's voice was tender with no hint of scolding. "I'm sorry, Miss Alice. I didn't mean to worry you. Remember when Opal was so sick after she overheard me talking to Ruby Mae. I wanted to help her, but was afraid that I was just making things worse." "Of course, I do." "Well, you told me then that I had taken up this burden and I needed to carry it out. I should love Opal until the hurt went away and if I gave up on her, she would give up on herself." "Yes." Miss Alice held one hand in front of her lips, anticipating what was coming next. "Margaret was right. Neil does need me. He's just too darn stubborn to admit it. I care about him, Miss Alice. He's probably one of my best friends here in the Cove, despite all of his condescending and challenges." Christy's voice was sad. It pained her to see Neil suffering so, not knowing what she could do to help him. "Miss Alice, what can I do?" Miss Alice smiled softly and sat down on the edge of the bed. Reaching out and gently touching the Bible lying open in Christy's lap she said, "You're doing it right now. Pray for him, Christy. He might not believe in God, but God believes in Neil MacNeill. I know if anyone can help him, it is the two of you." She leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the forehead, "Now get some rest." The children gathered at the schoolhouse the next morning to welcome Christy back. She was overjoyed to see them all. Little Burl was wearing his new shoes. Rob showed her some stories that he had been working on. Becky O'Teale's eyes were improving and it appeared that Dr. MacNeill's treatments had worked. She still wore glasses but thankfully still had her sight. Suddenly, Christy had an idea. "Children, I want to tell you about a tradition we have back home in Asheville at this time of year. Would you like to hear it?" The children nodded in excitement. They loved stories and especially the ones Miss Christy told about Asheville. After she had made a layout of the city with pinecones for houses and pine needles for streets, the children had a clear picture of the place where their beloved teacher lived before. They quickly gathered around her at the front of the school. "Back home in Asheville, my family and I have a tradition each New Year's. As one year ends and another one begins, we take this time to thank the people that have helped us in some way or have been special to us. It's a way of letting them know that we care about them and to wish them good things for the coming year." "Teacher," Little Burl said. "That sounds like Thanksgivin' ta me." "No, Little Burl. At Thanksgiving we thank God for our blessings and for our family and friends, but at New Year's we thank each other." "Sounds like a real good idea, Miz Christy. We don't get much chance to tell others how we feel `bout `em," Ruby Mae answered, stealing a sideways glance at Rob Allen. ~~~~ On New Year's Eve, the mission hosted a party to celebrate. The mountain people rarely celebrated as most of them were in bed early, preparing for the next day's work. This year they had much to celebrate, particularly the outcome of the scarlet fever epidemic, which thankfully had not taken the lives of any of the Cove's children. Fairlight and the other women brought pies and other goodies. Jeb Spencer, his son John, and others provided the music. As the evening wore on, Christy was pleased to see that Miss Alice seemed happier. Although she didn't dance of course, Christy did notice that her foot was tapping underneath the hem of her long black skirt. However, Neil was nowhere to be found. She hated the thought of him spending the New Year alone. She wandered out onto the porch, clutching her shawl closer around her against the bitter night air. Just then she heard an angry voice and a pair of strong hands gripped her shoulders. "And just what do you think you are doing? Do you think that I am a fool, someone you can turn into the subject of the Cove's gossip mill?" "Neil, what are you talking about?" "You told them, didn't you?" He was shouting now, his forehead furrowed in anger and eyes blazing. "Stop yelling. You'll disturb everyone inside." She walked off of the porch and headed into the yard away from the house. "What are you talking about?" "The people of the Cove. They've been coming by my cabin lately, for no reason." Neil's voice took on a mountain accent, " `Been thinkin' `bout how you helped my little boy last month, Doc, wanted ta thank ya for it a-gain.' `Doc, I wanted ta tell ya how much I'm oblidged ta ya for fixin' up my hand after hit got crushed by that millstone.' " His brogue again returned, louder than before, "You told them that…" He was so furious he could hardly speak. He hated the idea of people knowing about his feelings. Mountain men were slow to show them and didn't like the idea of people knowing their innermost thoughts, it was considered a sign of weakness. "You told them that I don't think I'm a good doctor. You had no right, Christy! That's my business and no one else's. To think that I should have trusted you…" She quickly cut him off, her voice growing too in pitch as she angrily defended herself. "How dare you! I would never betray a confidence. I never told anyone anything." Suddenly, she gasped and put her hand over her mouth. "Ah ha, so you did let it slip out didn't you?" "Neil," Christy said, her voice now softer, barely above a whisper, "the only person I told was God. I prayed that night that God would show you somehow how important you are to everyone here." "Well, I don't need you help, Christy, or your God's! I'm doing just fine by myself like I always have!" He stormed away. Inside, Christy could hear the crowd counting down to midnight and the New Year. She remembered Miss Alice's words, "Love her until the hurt goes away." She watched as Neil crossed the yard and headed back to where he had tied his horse. Quickly, she raced to him. Her voice was firm. "Neil, I told you before that you're not going to get rid of me that easily and I meant it. Go ahead and hate yourself and all of us if you want, but that's not going to stop the people of the Cove from loving you." She abruptly stood on her tiptoes and planted a kiss on his cheek. "Happy New Year, Dr. MacNeill," she said with determination and walked away. Chapter 21 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Over the next several weeks, more people stopped by to visit Dr. MacNeill. Sometimes they brought a chicken or beans, or another small token of their appreciation. Every time he graciously accepted their gift and wondered what had possessed the people of the Cove to take up this new trait. Finally, when the tenth person stopped by unexpectedly as he tried to make some minor repairs to the chinking in his cabin walls, he asked. "Uncle Bogg, it's not like to just stop by to chat, tell me what a fine job I've been doing and thank me for helping Tom when he was shot. What's going on here?" "Well, um," Uncle Bogg scuffed his feet in the leaves, "I was visitin' with Tom and Opal an' the youn'uns were sayin' how Miz Christy tol' `em `bout a tra-dition they got up in Asheville. Thankin' folks who holped `em durin' the year an' all. I `membered how ya holped my Tom. Felt guilty-like that I han't stopped by a-fore an' thanked ya." He obviously felt uncomfortable admitting that he was doing a good deed. He tipped his hat, "Well, doc, I gotta be goin' now. Thanks a-gain." Christy. Neil shook his head again. So she was behind this. But she had said that she had only prayed about his situation. Although he didn't really believe that God cared about prayers or even answered them, Christy did and so did many others. Science was the only thing that made sense to him. Chemistry and math were the few sure things in life he knew he could count on. But he had seen some things that science could not explain away--like Creed Allen who had stopped breathing but woke up after Fairlight and the others prayed over him. Neil tried to credit it to the effects of the medicine he had injected, but was slowly wondering if it might not have been something else. She had given her word that she hadn't mentioned his feelings to anyone and he believed her. How then did so many people decide to come to visit him? He hated to admit it, but it did cheer him up a little. Maybe the people of the Cove did need him as their doctor after all, but he still felt guilty about Margaret. ~~~~~~~~~ Slowly, winter began to loosen its hold on the Cove. On his way home from making a call on one of his patients, Neil stopped by to visit Aunt Hattie. "Hattie, I thought I'd bring you some of this meat. I'll never be able to eat all of it. Would you take some for me?" "Thank you, Neil. It's nice to have you drop by. I was just thinkin' how glad I am that it will be spring soon. I love winter too you know. God gave every season something beautiful of course, but I do love spring. The way the flowers smell just perks me up." She smiled and patted a small stool next to her, "Come on and sit a spell if you have time." Neil pulled up the stool and sat next to her. Hattie was his favorite aunt and the only family he had left. "Neil, you seem to be feeling better, if you don't mind me sayin' so. I was awful worried about you when Margaret died." She reached out toward his hand, "I know it's not nice to speak ill of the dead, but Neil, she never really made you happy. It twas a noble thing you did though. Takin' her back and all, but she's gone now. You've gotta stop blaming yourself. There weren't nothing you could do. She's with the Lord now and finally at peace." He sighed, knowing that she was right, about everything. "I know, Hattie." "People stoppin' by been tellin' me how folks all over these mountains have been stoppin' in on you, telling you how much they are oblidged to you for takin' care of them and their kin." She smiled, "You're a very beloved man here, Neil MacNeill, `bout time you started seeing that." "Yes," he responded muttering under his breath, "thanks to a particular young teacher." "Miz Christy? Well that sounds like somethin' she'd do." They sat in silence, the two of them each stringing beans on a piece of cotton twine. As they worked, Hattie began to sing. Neil loved to hear his aunt's voice. When he was little she would sing to him. The descriptions his mother had given him of angel's voices made him sure that Hattie must be an angel. Although he had given up on angels and God long ago, her voice still soothed and calmed him. She sang numerous hymns including her favorite "Amazing Grace" and then started on some of her own tunes. "He took wild mountain laurel and he twined it in her hair She said she didn't love him she said she didn't care He wooed with pink roses and purple columbine Did everything he knew to change her mind…" Her voice drifted around him like a gentle stream. He put the bowl down, "Hattie, please can you sing another song?" "What's wrong, Neil? I thought that was one of your favorites." "It is, but I just can't bear to hear it now. It reminds me of…" his voice faced. "It reminds you of Christy doesn't it. She cares for you, Neil. I'm blind but even I can see that." She smiled, and patted his hand. "Stop bein' so darned stubborn and open your heart to that, my boy. Love is a gift from God and you can't go turnin' it away." ~~~~~~~~~~~ Spring came slowly to Cutter Gap. For Neil thankfully it was a quiet winter--only several serious emergencies. He kept to himself mostly, making long overdue repairs on the cabin and generally keeping himself busy. He avoided the mission except for his trips to restock the dispensary. Christy stopped by to check on him, but he always feigned an important task he needed to get back to. She would not be discouraged though and he could count on her weekly visits like clockwork. Outwardly, he acted like he didn't care, but secretly he looked forward to her visits. She was so vibrant, like spring itself in many ways. She never failed to believe that anything was possible and to Neil's surprise had proven that since she arrived in Cutter Gap over two years ago. Just as the trees were beginning to get their first buds, Ruby Mae rushed into his cabin, breathless, not even bothering to knock. "Doc, ya gotta come quick. There's trouble in the Cove. Mr. O'Teale's back and he's done set fire to their cabin. Orter Ball O'Teale ran to get help, but Mountie, Becky and Miz O'Teale are hurt right bad." Chapter 22 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Christy had seen their bruised and battered bodies just outside of their smoldering cabin when they arrived. Orter Ball O'Teale had run as fast as he could to the mission for help, but by the time that Dan, Miss Alice, Christy and David arrived, the cabin was destroyed with only a few charred and glowing timbers left. Just a little while later, Neil rode up with Ruby Mae behind him and joined Dan who was attending to the girls and their mother. "Pa came back," Orter Ball told them as they waited impatiently while Neil and Dan examined them in the yard. "He were drunk, like usual. He seen Mountie's new shoes and tried ta throw them outside. She grabbed his arm an' told him to stop. He couldn't `ieve that she was talkin' and that Ma had `lowed her to go to school. `I don't take no fussin' over gals,' he yelled at her and then he hit Ma. Becky was hidin' up in the loft but ran down an' tried ta stop him. Pa took one look at Becky's glasses and started beatin' her too. We was so scared. We tried to make him stop, but he wouldn't. We stayed until he started the fire. He left after that and we tried to put it out, but we couldn't. That's when we ran for the mission." His face was covered with soot and two tearstained marks ran down either side of his face. Neil walked back toward the group. "How are they?" Christy asked a worried expression on her face. The look on Neil's face broke her heart. "Neil, no!" He pulled her aside, away from the young boy. "It's Becky. She didn't make it. The beating nearly killed her as it was, and then all the smoke…" His voice broke and he couldn't continue. Miss Alice quickly went to his side, focused on the task still remaining at hand. "Mrs. O'Teale and Mountie? How are they?" "They're hurt pretty badly, but they should be all right." He turned and looked sadly up the hill at the lifeless body of Becky that lay underneath his jacket. "We'll send David to get the wagon to take them to the mission. Mr. O'Teale may return and I fear for their safety," Alice said. Dr. MacNeill nodded. David returned half an hour later with the wagon. Neil had not left Becky's side. The young preacher walked up to him and put his hand on his shoulder, "Doctor, we can put Becky in the wagon now with the others." Neil's head snapped around quickly, glaring at David as if he had caused all of this to happen. "She's going back with me!" Christy sat in the wagon with Mountie, her mother and brother. The children were all so distraught that she didn't want to leave them alone. She worried that the traumatic events might cause Mountie to stop speaking again. Mountie stared at her from behind swollen, blackened eyes and managed a weak smile. She held tighter to Christy's fingers as the wagon bumped along the road back to the mission. Over her shoulder, Christy could see Dr. MacNeill cradling the limp body of Becky O'Teale against his chest as he rode. Neil adored all of the Cove's children but Becky held a special place in his heart. He was so proud of her bravery during and after the eye operation. In return, she had drawn a picture of the first thing that she saw after regained her sight. "I'll treasure it always," Neil's voice echoed in her head as Christy started to cry. ~~~~~ As she had done before for Opal McHone's infant daughter, Christy helped to prepare Becky's body for the funeral. She combed her long hair until it shone, tying a bright blue ribbon in a bow at the top of her head. When she came to Cutter Gap Christy never thought that she would do something like this, but she felt a need to. She was thankful that she was alone with the little girl. Staring into Becky's beautiful face, Christy desperately wanted to cry. The hot tears welled in her eyes. It was so unfair! Becky was so young. She had just learned to read and was starting to excel in school. She closed her eyes and could hear the sound of Becky's laughter as she played with the other girls in the yard during recess. Christy struggled to fight back her tears before the others came into the room. There would be time for grieving, later. Becky was her student and needed her now. Christy was not going to let her or her family down. Neil walked by her and stopped to stare at the face of another lost patient. "She looks like an angel doesn't she?" Christy smiled weakly, "Yes, she does." He reached past her and removed Becky's glasses. The glass was shattered in one lens and the frame horribly twisted. He placed them in his pocket, "She won't need them where she is now." Christy looked at him curiously, but couldn't respond. ~~~~~ After the funeral the next morning, he wandered past the church. The door was open and he saw Miss Alice inside, her hands clasped in prayer. Suddenly, the rage he held inside spilled out. "How can you sit here and pray for her," he shouted. "Who are you praying to? There is no one to answer! If there were, this wouldn't have happened to a young, innocent girl! A man killed his own child and you are praying to God? You're a fool, Alice Henderson!" Alice sat quietly as Neil raged, flailing his arms about wildly and pacing back and forth up the aisle. "Neil, it is a horrible, terrible thing that happened yesterday, but you cannot blame God. He did not do this to poor Becky." "He let it happen! He could have stopped it if He wanted to, but He let it happen!" Tears were streaming down his face, but he didn’t wipe them away. He hated that he was showing this kind of emotion in front of Alice but it was beyond his control. Alice continued, her voice softer as she carefully chose her words. "Neil, we've all been given a free choice. We can choose either evil or good. Unfortunately, sometimes people, like Nathan O'Teale, choose evil. What good would it do if God gave us that choice and then took it away when we didn't do what He wants us to? It would be no different than a parent slapping a child's hand when he reached to lick batter from a spoon. Do you want a God like that, Neil? Someone who's always waiting for us to make a mistake so we can be punished for it?" He didn't answer but she could see that she was beginning to reach him. "We are the ones who have to decide which side we are on. No, God doesn't stop evil. Not directly at least. Instead He works through us, giving us a thought in our head that won't go away, a gut feeling if you will, something telling us that we are needed, that we need to do something for Him to fight against evil. Do you remember when Margaret left after she came back with Theodore Harlen?" Neil nodded. "During the singing, I had a feeling that Margaret was somehow slipping away from me. I ran out to the schoolhouse just in time to see her disappear over the hill." She paused, holding a trembling finger in front of her mouth as she tried to slow the tears forming in her eyes. "I was heartbroken. My daughter had returned from the dead and I hoped that we'd have another chance together. Just then as I knelt there, crying for all of the time we had lost and would never have again, I heard Christy behind me. I didn't see her, but I knew it was Christy. I reached out my hand and she took it." Neil stood before her, a weary defeated figure, his shoulders slumped and eyes bloodshot. She wasn't sure if her words had reached him, but he shook his head sadly as if he couldn't quite understand what to make of it. "How can that happen? You can't just read someone's mind like that." Miss Alice started to smile softly, "She knew that I needed someone. I know in my heart that God spoke to her. That is how God works, Neil, through us not against us." The corners of his mouth raised slightly. His voice was softer, almost timid. "She did the same for me you know. One night after Margaret left, I couldn't sleep. What had happened and my role in it all haunted me. She gave me back my rings, but I was still married to her. Just when I thought that there was some kind of a future out there for me…" He stopped, remembering that Alice Henderson was Margaret's mother. "I left the cabin and just started walking. I didn't think about where I was going or what time it was. I just needed to think things out. As I rounded a curve in the river, I saw someone standing at the edge of the river, looking up at the moon. I didn't realize until I nearly reached her that it was Christy. I couldn't understand why she was out so late by herself or why she was so far away from the mission. We talked and I told her about Margaret. Then I realized that although I couldn't change what happened, I felt better, like there was still some hope." Alice smiled, "Neil, before we knew that Margaret was alive, I realized that although my daughter was gone, Christy was another gift. In her heart, Christy knows that we need her, that we BOTH need her. I didn't want to admit it that night at the mission when I confronted you about the feelings I knew you had for her. You challenged me then. You said that you'd tell the truth if I did. Well, I'm ready to tell it. Are you?" Chapter 23 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "What truth is that, Alice?" He looked defeated with his shoulders slouched and his brow furrowed, but there was still that stubborn Scot pride. True, he had cried in front of her, but Neil MacNeill was not about to tell Alice know he felt about the young schoolteacher. "All right, Neil. Be stubborn. You can lie to me, but you can't lie to yourself. I, however, am not ashamed to say it. I do see much of Margaret in Christy. They have the same zest for life, but Christy has none of the anger and bitterness that Margaret did. She looks at the world from behind those big blue eyes," Alice stopped, smiling softly. "Although she has seen and experienced things that I thought she couldn't bear, she is constantly surprising me. When she first came here, dozens of times I expected Christy Huddleston to pack her bags and be on the next train home to Asheville. But she never did, she got that determined look in her eye and kept going." Alice shook her head slightly, "She's not my daughter, but I love her like one, Neil. I'm not ashamed to say that." ~~~~~~~~~~ In his cabin the following morning just before dawn, Neil opened his mother's Bible. Over the winter, he had tried to rationalize some of the things that still baffled him. Creed Allen's amazing recovery particularly troubled him. He had spent years studying medicine and practicing in Scotland and the Cove, but there was no plausible explanation for it. Slowly, he had begun to wonder if, maybe just maybe, God did indeed have something to do with his life. Christy certainly believed in Him. Until Christy, Neil wondered if he believed in anything other than science. He had begun to doubt himself as a doctor and as a person, but she had cared. Somehow she had looked past his bluster and self-loathing and cared. He shook his head. Reaching down, he took a small spotted brown feather out from between the pages. He had placed it there months ago after he had plucked it off of Christy's skirt. It was foolish to keep it, but it was his only tie to her. Christy had come to see him about helping Rob Allen prepare for a college entrance exam. She presented her case confidently, standing up to his questioning and challenges. The corners of his mouth lifted in a slight smile as he remembered her words. "No? I left my home, my family, all I hold dear to come to the mountains and teach school, something I had never done before. And yes, it's changed me, but it does not hold me back, it pushes me forward." Staring out into the woods, he twirled the feather between his fingers. ~~~~~~~~~ Mountie and Swannie O'Teale were better, but Miss Alice agreed that they should remain in the mission. Christy was thankful that Mountie seemed to be recovering nicely. Her tiny body was covered in sickly green bruises, but apart from her natural grief at her older sister's death, she seemed to have survived the ordeal remarkably well. Knowing that they were both improving, Christy was grateful that Cecile Scott had agreed to take over full teaching responsibilities for the next couple of days. Seeing Becky's empty spot in school was too much for her right now. She wanted to get on Prince and gallop as fast as she could, as if by mere speed she could outrun the aching in her heart. She knew that God was not responsible for her death and that she was now in heaven, but inside Christy struggled with her emotions. She remembered Miss Alice's words, "Sometimes the sound of my own words are too loud and I need to get completely silent to hear Him." Then an idea struck her. God's Fist. She would go on a retreat to God's Fist, like Miss Alice did. Maybe some time alone to think and to pray would help her. She still had a classroom full of children who needed her… ~~~~~~ David graciously offered Prince to her. "Are you sure you should go alone, Christy? It's a long way," he said as he helped saddle the large black horse. "No, David, I'll be fine. I'm only going to be there overnight and Miss Alice assures me that it's perfectly safe." "All right, I know your mind is made up. But at least take this with you," he said, thrusting a gun into the holder he had attached to the saddle. Christy looked at it, "Thanks, David." What on earth was she going to do with that, she thought to herself. She didn't even know how to fire it, but he was being thoughtful. Christy reached God's Fist later that morning as the fog was beginning to lift. She had seen the mountains numerous times but their beauty always amazed her. Seven dark purple ranges lifted up before her, rising up toward the vault of the sky. Far taller than any mountain surrounding it, God's Fist was magnificent. Its peak still surrounded in fog, Christy urged the horse onward toward the top. The air here was crisp and smelled heavily of evergreen and wildflowers. Reaching a clearing nearly at the summit, she dismounted, tying Prince to a nearby tree. A large granite slab jutted out from the face of the mountain. Nearly as wide as the mission parlor, from that spot Christy could see for miles. Heights terrified her, but it was so beautiful that she relented. Staying close to a large pine tree growing far away from the edge however, she leaned against it, closing her eyes and praying. She sat there most of the day, silently reading the Bible she had brought with her and listening. Around midday, she opened the sack she brought with her and pulled out a sandwich and apple. Having finally satisfied the gnawing in her stomach, she removed her journal from her leather bag. She flipped through the pages, stopping at each image she had drawn. Miss Alice. Her parents. Mountie O'Teale. David. Becky. She paused, tracing the pencil outline with her finger. Dear Becky. Poor, poor Becky. Hot tears started to stream down her face as she quickly pushed the journal away before they splashed onto the page. ~~~~~~~ Neil stood knee-deep in the cool mountain water. Holding his pole up to his shoulder, he flicked the line onto the surface of the water. Christy's voice echoed in his head. "Only God can work miracles, Doctor…God gave you the right when he gave you the gift." Neil struggled with himself. He had grown up at his mother's knee listening to her read the Bible. Closing his eyes, he could see her, sitting in a chair by the fire, reading aloud, "For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things." Her faith was so strong, while his was so weak. What would she think of him now, he thought sadly. ~~~~ Pushing back his dirty plate, Neil leaned back in his chair. Walking out onto the porch, his pipe in hand, he noticed the Bible lying on the porch railing where he had left it. Picking it up, he sat down in a cane-bottom chair and for the first time in years, started to read. Chapter 24 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Neil read until the sun dropped so low in the sky that he could barely make out the words. He had spent so many years trying to discredit everything his parents had taught him. The words soothed him, like a mother comforting a child. Unconditional love poured out to him on every page. Promises that no matter how undeserving or helpless, he was always loved and there was always hope. This new knowledge was invigorating. He finally felt free, freer than he had in years. It was like he was a young boy again, without a care in the world knowing that his parents would take care of him. Although it was getting dark, Neil couldn't bring himself to go inside. How could he keep this newfound emotion trapped inside the cabin's small walls? He quickly saddled his horse and galloped off through the woods, headed for the mission. The wind in his hair and on his face felt glorious. He couldn't wait to tell Christy what had happened. Finally, he would be telling her how right she was for a change. He galloped into the yard, leaping off his horse in mid-stride. Tethering him quickly to a nearby post, he raced up the stairs to the mission. Alice Henderson rounded the corner, as he stood pounding heartily on the door. "Can I help you, Neil?" He quickly spun around to face her, his eyes gleaming. "Is Christy about? I've something I want to tell her." Alice stared for a moment at Dr. MacNeill. She had never seen him so overjoyed. It puzzled and intrigued her. "I'm sorry. She's not here. She took Becky's death very hard and needed some time to herself. She's gone on an overnight retreat. She left just this morning." In two long strides he was at her side, gripping her by the arms. "Alice, you must tell me where she is. I have to speak with her. Something has happened…" The look on his face was not one of concern but of utter joy. Alice paused for a moment, wondering if he should intrude on Christy's retreat. But Neil's expression told her that something had indeed changed in the doctor. "Alice, please…" he pleaded. She sighed and relented. "She's gone to God's Fist, but she'll be back by mid-morning tomorrow. Can it wait until then?" "No, Alice. It cannot." He leaned forward, impetuously kissing her on the cheek. "Thank you," he said quickly and hurried away. Rounding the corner of the mission, he bumped into David. "Hey, Doc. Where are you going in such a hurry?" He gleefully patted David on the arm, "To find Christy. There's something I have to tell her…" Before David could respond, Neil had jumped on his horse and was racing toward the mountains. Entering the mission kitchen, he saw Alice. Looking over his shoulder toward the figure on horseback disappearing in the distance, he asked, "Did you tell Dr. MacNeill that Christy was at God's Fist?" Drying her hands, she replied, "Yes, David. I did indeed." She smiled and returned to putting away the night's dishes. "I don't understand. I thought that of all people you would know that she needed this time to think." His voice began to rise to a louder pitch. "There is no need to raise thy voice at me, David. He needed to speak with Christy and I felt that she would be glad to hear what he has to say." "What on earth could he possibly say to her that would warrant intruding on her retreat?" "I feel that there is a change in the doctor." She paused, carefully wiping the dishes as she placed them on the shelf. He was livid. She had sent Neil MacNeill off to disturb Christy and she couldn't even give him a decent explanation. As he started to storm off, Alice shouted at his back, "Thee might just have another face in church on Sunday." He stopped dead in his tracks, spinning around quickly to face her. "What did you say?" Miss Alice's mouth was drawn in a wide grin. "I think that Neil MacNeill has finally come to the Lord." She clasped her hands in front of her chest in a gesture of prayer, excited at the very thought of it. "Dr. MacNeill? A believer? What makes you think that? He doesn't believe in anything but science and himself. He's said it a dozen times." "David," she said in shock, "shouldn't thee be rejoicing at the thought of him coming to God?" She returned to wiping the plates and responded tersely, "Or art thou more concerned of him going to Christy?" He stood in the doorway, troubled that she was right. He had tried to get over Christy's rejection of his proposal during the past fall and winter. He thought he had succeeded, but when it involved Neil MacNeill it was difficult to let the old rivalry go. ~~~~~~~ As Neil neared the top of God's Fist, he called out. If Christy was nearby he wanted her to know that he was coming. He didn't want to startle her. His presence there and what he needed to tell her were startling enough. "Christy? Christy? Where are you? It's Neil." Suddenly, a figure stood bolt upright off to his left. "Neil? What are you doing here? Are you all right?" He reigned his horse in sliding down from his back. "I am. I came up here to talk to you, Christy. There's something I need to tell you." She gathered her skirts in her hands and rushed to his side. "I'm so glad you're here," she said, wiping the stray tears from her eyes. "I am so sorry that I didn't talk to you after the fire at the O'Teale's. I was so hurt that we had lost poor Becky." The tears started to flow again, running down her face, but she did not try to stop them. "I knew that you were hurting too, but I couldn't pull myself out of my grief to go to you. I saw how you held her in your arms when we rode back to the mission. It nearly broke my heart, Neil." She reached out, holding him by the sleeve. "I knew that I was barely dealing with my own grief and if I saw you, I would just break down. Please forgive me for being so selfish." He drew her closer to him, holding her gently to his chest, "There, there, little one. I understand. I knew how much you loved Becky. Yes, I was hurting. That's what I came here to talk to you about." He gently pushed her away and looked into her eyes. Chapter 25 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Christy, I was so wrong about so many things. I blamed myself for not being able to save Becky. I hated myself for what happened to Margaret. But most of all, I hated God for taking people I care about away from me." His eyes looked off into the distance as if he were remembering. "Like most boys, I guess, I worshipped my mother. She was a beautiful woman, Christy, inside and out. I wished you could have known her." He sighed wistfully and continued, "When she died, I cursed God for taking her from us. She was so young. It just wasn't fair. Her faith was so strong and I couldn't understand why God would want to take her." He continued, "Slowly, as I studied medicine, I came to believe that there was no place in my life for God. By helping people, by bringing them back from an otherwise certain death, I could cheat Him. I could fight God and win, or so I thought. I was wrong. I've realized that I don't hold the power of life and death in my hands. My medical training can help me save some, but what about Creed Allen? I did everything I knew that day. I administered the newest treatment available, but he was gone. It was Fairlight's faith and all of yours that brought that boy back. I realize that now. I've fought Him for too many years, but I'm not doing that anymore." "Neil," Christy asked, "are you saying that you've accepted God into your life?" Her voice was unsure and faltering, as if she could scarcely believe what she was hearing. "Yes, Christy. I am." He beamed and his smile was more radiant than Christy had ever seen it before. He reached for her hand, "But I have so much more that I want to tell you." ~~~~~~~~~ Inside the mission house, Alice Henderson took out her Bible, opening it to a chapter she had marked long ago. "Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not. Beloved, new are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure. Whosoever commith sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law. And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin. Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him. Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous. He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil. Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God. In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother. For this is the message that ye heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. Not as Cain, who was of that wicked one, and slew his brother. And wherefore slew he him? Because his own works were evil, and his brother's righteous. Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you. We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death. Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him. Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. And hereby we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before him. For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things. Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then we have confidence toward God. And whatsoever we ask, we receive of him, because we keep his commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in his sight. And this is his commandment, That we should believe on the name of his Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, as he gave us commandment. And he that keepth his commandments dwelleth in him, and he in him. And hereby we know that he abideth in us, by the Spirit which he hath given us." Closing her eyes and clasping her hands in front of her, Alice silently prayed for a young schoolteacher and a backwoods doctor. ~~~~~~~~ The sky was now dark. Christy had stared many nights at the stars since she had arrived in the Cove, marveling at how different the night sky looked compared to her home in Asheville. From God's Fist, the firmament seemed littered with stars, thousands of small pinpoints in the blackness. They stood together silently looking up at the night sky, their hands still intertwined. "Christy," Neil's voice was gentle as he spoke her name. It fell like music from his lips. She turned to face him. His face was softer and the expression in his eyes was peaceful. Hesitatingly his fingers caressed her hand. "I love you. With all my heart and soul, I love you. I was a stupid fool for not telling you earlier." He leaned closer to her. Closing her eyes, she could smell a faint blend of pipe tobacco, antiseptic cleanser, evergreens, and saddle soap. If he only knew what it was like for her to stand so close to him, to breathe in the very essence of him, she thought. Before she even realized what she was doing, she whispered softly, "Neil, I love you so much." With trembling hands he reached up to touch her face, twining his fingers through her light brown hair as he pulled her closer to him. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as his lips gently touched hers. She held him tightly, her arms wrapped around his neck. Smiling down at her, he whispered, "I thought I'd never hear those words." He held her close, burrowing his face in her sweet smelling hair as she nestled her head against his chest. All around them the night was so still, punctuated only by the lonely call of a whip-o-will. They embraced each other for what seemed like hours, until Neil slowly pulled away. "You know I'd love to stay here all night, but we should go back." "No, Neil. Not yet, I want to talk to you about everything that has happened," Christy said, holding onto his sleeve. "Let's stay a little longer, please." He shook his head. "It wouldn't be right. After all, Miss Alice and David know I'm here. It wouldn't be right for me to become a proper Christian and then spend half the night alone on a mountain with you. We can talk on the way back." "You're right. Of course, it would look improper." She sighed, knowing that it was best and went to collect her things. Finished putting them in the saddlebags, she walked to the edge of the mountain and stood staring up at the night sky. Two strong arms wrapped around her waist as Neil leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek. "What are you thinking about, lass? Are you regretting what you just told me?" She drew his arms tighter around her, leaning back against his chest and shook her head. "Not at all. I was just thinking how miraculous this all is." "What, you're surprised that I love you?" he teased. "I think everyone in the Cove, especially Fairlight, knew about it ages ago. Seems like they forgot to tell us though," he smiled and hugged her tighter. ~~~~~ They started back to the mission, Neil telling Christy about his thoughts over the past winter and how he had finally come to realize that God was indeed a powerful force in his life. Christy silently listened, marveling at the transformation that had taken place in the doctor. The man who she had teased about having all the answers had admitted his need for someone greater than himself. It was truly a miracle. They stopped their horses to water them at a stream that ran near the base of the mountain. Neil checked the horses' hooves and in a frustrated voice remarked, "Looks like Prince threw a shoe. Christy you'll have to ride with me. We can't risk riding him now. It's too far back to the mission." He lifted her into the saddle, placing her near Charlie's withers. "Neil, I can sit behind you. You'll be uncomfortable." "No arguing, lass. You're going to be comfortable on the ride home. I'll be fine." He swung himself up behind her and wrapped an arm around her waist. As they rode together slowly back to the mission, Prince walked along beside them, his reins in Neil's free hand. It was nearly mid-April but the night air still had a chill to it. Christy shuddered involuntarily as a breeze blew down from the mountains. "Are you cold," Neil asked. She nodded. "Here, lean against me. You'll be warmer." He opened his jacket and she gladly obeyed, while he nuzzled his face in her long brown tresses. ~~~~ Several hours later they arrived back at the mission house. It was past midnight and the mission was shrouded in darkness. Neil dismounted and helped Christy down. She immediately went to Prince and checked his hooves, concerned that he was hurt. After checking all four feet, she asked curiously giving him a sideways glance, "Neil? I thought you said that Prince had thrown a shoe." Neil said nothing and gave her a mischievous grin. After leading Prince back to the stable, he returned. "I'll be off now." He smiled and kissed her tenderly, "Don't worry. I'll stop by and see you tomorrow." ~~~~~ Curled under a quilt in her bed in the mission, she lay staring out into the darkness. Before sleep finally overcame her, she whispered, "Thank you, Lord." That night, for the first time in months, Christy Huddleston slept soundly. The next morning, she arose early to watch the sunrise. From her spot on the second floor porch, she rejoiced in the previous day's events. She had sought peace from God and had found it. For so long she had prayed for Neil to find his way to God and he had. Knowing that he loved her was more than she had expected. ~~~~~~~~~~ About midday, Neil rode up to the schoolhouse past the children who were eating their lunches and playing outside. Tying his horse, he quickly peeked inside the building to see if Christy was there. A tugging on his pants leg forced him to look down into the face of Little Burl Allen. "Ya here ta see Miz Christy, doc?" "Why yes, Little Burl. I am." He replied smiling down at the little boy. Just then Creed appeared at the top of the schoolhouse steps, "What'cha doin' with them flowers?" "They are for Miss Christy, Creed. Do you know where she is?" "Yes sir, she's at the mission house." Neil smiled and started down the stairs. Creed wrinkled his nose, "Doc, you ain't a-courtin' are ya?" Neil smiled widely and tousled the youngster's hair. "And what if I am, Creed?" he teased. "Don't you like Miss Christy?" "Sure, I do. Teacher's right nice. But I ain't gonna grow up an' act all sillyfied an' bring no gal flowers." Neil laughed and continued down the stairs toward the mission house. His presence did not go unnoticed by Ruby Mae and some of the older girls as they stood giggling and whispering near the schoolhouse. As he passed them, their giggling grew even louder. Finally Ruby Mae grew bold and rushed after him. "Dr. MacNeill, are those flowers for Miz Christy," she asked with a twinkle in her eye and a mischievous grin. "Why, matter of fact they are. And before you go asking me fifty questions, I'm not answering," he said and playfully swatted her with the bouquet. The young redhead ran back to the group and they huddled together, whispering even louder and giggling uncontrollably. Chapter 26 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Neil bounded up the mission steps and peeked into the kitchen. "Neil MacNeill, you're a sight for sore eyes," Fairlight responded as she continued to prepare bread for the evening meal. "Really? Why is that Fairlight," he asked, leaning against the doorframe. "Haven't seen you in ages. Are ya doin' all right?" she asked, looking up from her work. "Couldn't be better," he responded enthusiastically. "Is Christy about?" Fairlight's trained mother's eye had noticed the bouquet of wildflowers Neil held at his side. She smiled. "So that explains why Miz Christy's been floatin' around here all day like she's walkin' on clouds." Neil smiled sheepishly. Fairlight wiped her hands on her apron and stepped out into the breezeway between the mission and kitchen. "She's probably upstairs. Let me go check on her for ya." Stopping before Christy's partly open door, she knocked. "Miz Christy, Dr. MacNeill's here to see you." Christy spun around, her face beaming. She quickly tidied her hair and clothes and rushed down the hall, slowing down to catch her breath before she reached Neil. "Neil," she said as she reached the bottom of the steps, "it's good to see you." She had never felt nervous and uncomfortable in front of him before, but now she felt like a schoolgirl. "Christy, you look lovely as always," he said, holding out the bouquet of flowers. "These are for you." An intense blush came over her face and she was speechless. He smiled and motioned that they sit down in the parlor. Christy sat and nervously shifted position in her chair. "Thank you, Neil. They are lovely." He looked a bit disappointed at her response as he teased, "Just lovely?" "I mean…they…um…" Christy responded awkwardly. She glanced up to see Ruby Mae, Lizette and Bessie peering in through the parlor window. Christy reached up, nervously fingering her hair, blushing even more intensely. Neil followed her nervous gaze to the window where he spied the young girls. He stood up and opened the parlor door. "Can I help you young ladies with something?" he asked playfully. "No sir," they stammered and quickly ran back to the schoolhouse. Neil returned to where Christy was sitting, leaning closer he whispered, "It's all right, Christy. I'm still the same old stubborn Scot that used to challenge you at every turn." She smiled and began to regain her composure. Standing up, she took the flowers into the kitchen and put them in a container filled with water. Placing them on the dining room table, she commented, "Neil, they are beautiful. Thank you for thinking of me." "You don't notice anything in particular…" "No, am I supposed to," she asked questioningly. He began to softly hum "Mountain Laurel." Christy's eyes flew back to the cluster of flowers on the table--primarily purple columbine and other wildflowers. "I wanted to include some laurel, but you'll have to wait for another couple of weeks until they bloom." Christy stared at him in disbelief, unconsciously biting her lower lip. "That song always reminded me of you," he said wistfully. "Would you like to go for a ride? We'll never be able to talk with school letting out later." She nodded and waited on the porch while he brought Charlie down the hill. ~~~~~~~ "Christy, I want you to understand something. I am very happy that I have finally come to understand why you, Alice and the Reverend have such a close relationship with God. But, I'm still struggling with all of this. It's so new to me, after all these years and I'm afraid I'm not good enough…" She stopped him mid-sentence. "Neil, it's not a competition. You have come to God. That's all that matters. Miss Alice has told me so many times that I make mistakes. I'm human, Neil. We all are. We just have to try to do His will and to learn from each other." He took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. "I'm glad that you said that. I know how important God is to you. Now that we…have told each other how we feel, I don't want you to regret it." She reached up and gently touched his face. "No. I'd never regret it." ~~~~~ Christy returned to the mission house a little before dinner. She headed directly upstairs to check on Mountie. Opening the door she saw her seated in David's lap, reading aloud from Peter Rabbit. She smiled. "Hi, Mountie. I'm glad to see that you're feeling better." "Hi Teacher," Mountie responded, beaming and continued to read aloud to David. "She was nice enough to share her favorite book with me," David replied, setting her down gently and standing up to greet Christy. "Mountie, it's almost time for dinner. I'll see you downstairs in a few minutes, OK?" David remarked and followed Christy out into the hall. They walked out onto the porch downstairs. "Christy," David began, "I need to talk to you." "Of course, David. I'm sorry we haven't had much of a chance to talk since I returned from Asheville." He nodded and continued. "Christy, you know I love you…" She instantly dropped her eyes, afraid that he was going to bring up that subject again. She had hoped that he had put the idea of a romantic relationship behind them. He put his hand under her chin and drew her gaze back up to him. "Let me finish, please. I love you very much as a dear friend. I'm sorry that I tried to push you into feeling things for me that just weren't there. I was heartbroken when you returned home to Asheville, but hated myself that I seemed to drive you to it." "No, David. It wasn't your fault. I just couldn't bear…" "I know," David interrupted, "You couldn't bear to see the man that you really love be with someone else. I know how you feel about Neil, Christy. I wanted to hate him for taking you away from me, but I can't. I've never seen you so happy as these past two days. All I ever cared about was your happiness. And if the man that can give you that is Neil MacNeill, well then, he's the luckiest man in the Cove." "Oh, David," Christy exclaimed, reaching up to hug him. "Thank you for that. I'm so glad that we can still be friends like before." Chapter 27 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Over the next several weeks, life in Cutter Gap resembled a strange mix of normality and curious events. Christy's mended relationship with David pleased her very much. Once again, they acted as they had when she had first come to the mission with David teasing her constantly like a big brother. Slowly, the Cove's gossip-conscience residents grew to expect the presence of a sandy haired doctor in church on Sundays, seated between Alice Henderson and Christy Huddleston. Eventually, the children, especially the older girls, stopped giggling whenever Dr. MacNeill would drop by after school to visit with Christy. "Expect the unexpected with God," Miss Alice had always told Christy and daily she saw it in action. Of course, with the end of the spring term approaching in less than two weeks, Christy was overloaded with work. The entire Cove looked forward to the final recitation where the children would present a play, "The Lost Clan." Written by their own Rob Allen, it was the story of how Neil MacNeill had led them to these mountains in 1750. Despite his unsuccessful attempt at the New York writing contest, Rob continued to write and Christy had convinced him that the story he had been working on would make a perfect historical play for the final recitation. In addition to Rob's play, the children were to participate in spelling and other contests. In just ten short days, she needed to help the children practice their lines, prepare the set decorations and costumes and help everyone with their individual presentations. There was just so much to be done. It was nearly dark, yet Christy sat in the schoolhouse hunched over her lesson plans. She was so engrossed in her work that she did not hear as someone quietly walked up the stairs and toward the front of the building. Suddenly, a gentle baritone voice startled her. Quickly she looked up, so startled that she hadn't recognized the voice. "Oh, Neil. Hi. I didn't hear you come in." She pointed at the stacks of open books all around her. "I've been so busy." "I see that," he commented, smiling. "Are you too busy to stop for dinner?" "Neil, I really need to finish." He placed his large work-worn hand on the open book in front of her. "Christy, as your doctor, I insist that you stop to eat. You can't push yourself so hard." "Why not? You can," she snapped. The look on his face immediately brought her to her senses. "Neil, I am so sorry. I…it's just I have been working so hard lately. I guess I'm a bit irritable." "I should say so," he replied, a note of mock pain in his voice. "Now, as the man who adores you more than anything else in the world, will you join me for dinner?" He held out his arm for her to take and together they walked toward the mission. ~~~~ After dinner, they sat together in the gazebo. Christy was obviously worried about something but Neil hesitated to press her on it. Finally in a shaky voice she started, "Neil, I don't understand why you put up with me sometimes. I get so caught up in my work with the children." She held her hands out helplessly, searching for the right words. "Just when I start to feel that I have matured, I realize that I have so much more to learn." "Christy, what exactly are you trying to say?" "I…I…I just don't think I'm good enough for you, Neil. I'm just so young and foolish sometimes. You were right about me. I think I know all the answers but I don't." Her voice was rising now, anguished as she finally spoke the things that she had been holding silently in her heart. "Like bringing Nathan Stone here. I nearly destroyed the families in this Cove. Thank God Fairlight and Jeb were able to come up with a plan to help Tom and Opal stay." Her voice faded as she stared into the distance. Neil sat silent for a few moments and then stood up. Christy shut her eyes tightly against the image of him walking out of the gazebo. Dear God, she thought to herself, he's leaving. Instead he walked in front of her, dropping on both knees so he could look directly into her eyes, much as she did with the children. "Christy, love, open your eyes. Look at me. I'm here because I love you. I've loved you since the moment I saw you kneeling in the mud next to Bob Allen." His face grew softer as he smiled, remembering the image. "There you were in your city finery, in the mud, with your handkerchief pressed over the wound of a man you didn't even know. Right then and there I fell in love with you." "Oh, I fought it for a long time," he continued, "telling myself that you could never love anyone as bitter and angry as me. But you changed me, Christy Huddleston. I found myself looking forward to you stopping by to tell me how lax I was being with my patients and how wrong I was about everything. So you see, my dear, we're stuck with one another." He took both of her hands in his, kissing them each lightly and pressed them to his heart. Christy's lips trembled as she fought back a torrent of tears. She threw her arms tightly around his neck, holding on to him as if she were drowning. "Neil, Neil, I love you so much. I…I just didn't want you to be unhappy because of me," she murmured, her voice muffled in his sandy curls. "Never, lass. I'd only be unhappy without you." ~~~~~ As Christy was getting ready for school, a knock sounded at her door. "Miz Christy," Ruby Mae called, "Doc MacNeill's here to see you." Christy quickly glanced in the mirror and smoothed her hair. Rushing downstairs, she met Neil on the porch. Over her shoulder she could see that there were several bags thrown over Charlie's withers and a bedroll behind the saddle. Her face immediately took on a look of concern. Neil noticed and responded with a note of playfulness in his voice, "I'm going to Low Gap for a few days. Will you miss me?" A slight blush crept over her face as she remembered the last time he had said those very words. Finally, she regained her composure, "Of course, I will! Neil, is everything all right?" "John Fitzgerald from over in Low Gap stopped by before dawn this morning. Several young children there are suffering from some sort of unexplained paralysis. I can't be sure until I see them, but I'm afraid it may be poliomyelitis." Christy's face wrinkled in confusion. "Polio, Christy. It enters the body through the digestive system and causes fatigue, headache, fever, vomiting, stiffness in the neck, all symptoms these children have. It doesn't look good. I read in my medical journals about an epidemic in Sweden back in 1905, the first one in 65 years. A lot of people died, Christy. I can't let that happen here." She followed him as he walked down the stairs and tightened the cinch on Charlie's saddle. "I'll be gone a few days, but will be back before school lets out. I don't want to miss that play of Rob's." Leaning forward, he kissed her on the cheek and whispered mysteriously in her ear, "I meant it that first time too. You were just too stubborn to notice it." He quickly swung up on Charlie, gave her a wink and rode off. Chapter 28 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All morning at school, Christy was unable to concentrate. Her mind kept returning to what Neil had told her earlier. "A lot of people died, Christy. I can't let it happen here." She had heard a little about the disease but for her it was enough to know that it was contagious and possibly deadly. Sullenly, she went about her work, her mind miles away in Low Gap. At lunch, she felt a small tug on her skirts as she sat staring out at the mountains, unable to touch her meal. "Teacher? Are ya sick?" She stared down into Mountie's big blue eyes and managed a smile. Scooping the little girl up into her lap, she replied, "No, Mountie. I'm just worried about Dr. MacNeill." The little girl leaned closer as if she were about to tell a secret. "Teacher, I like him too." With that, Christy smiled and hugged her. ~~~~~~ Over dinner, Christy tried to act unconcern. She had felt better since she had confessed her worries, albeit vaguely, to Mountie. As she pushed her potatoes around her plate for the third time without taking a bite, Dan announced that Dr. MacNeill had left a note for him stating that he'd be away for a few days attending to some patients in Low Gap. Christy stared blankly at her plate, all appetite gone. "Christy, are you well?" Miss Alice asked, a note of concern in her voice. "Yes," she responded, forcing herself to smile. Refusing dessert, Christy sat at the table silent until all had finished their meals. Having taken their plates into the kitchen, Christy followed Miss Alice and Dan outside onto the porch and confronted them. "I want to know what is going on," she demanded. "Is Neil in any danger?" Dan and Miss Alice both looked at one another helplessly, until Dan spoke up. "Polio has been around for a while, but they aren't sure how to treat it. It was less than six years ago when an Austrian pathologist, Karl Landsteiner, isolated the specific virus that causes polio. There haven't been many cases in the last 50 or so years, but I do remember reading about one in Europe around 10 years ago." He could see that Christy was becoming even more anxious. He decided to tell her the complete truth and quickly moved to the point, "The problem comes, Christy, when the paralysis affects the muscles that control breathing." He looked at Miss Alice before continuing, "It is contagious, especially so just before the symptoms appear until about a week later. When did Dr. MacNeill say that the children became ill?" "Two days ago," she replied weakly, as Miss Alice held her tightly around the shoulders. "Have faith, child. Neil is a very good doctor. He will take care of those children and be back before thee notices," Miss Alice responded comfortingly. ~~~~~~~ Anxiously, Christy waited for word from Low Gap. Two long days went by and they had heard nothing. As day turned into night, and night into day, Christy grew more and more concerned. She didn't doubt Neil's medical abilities, but she worried for his safety. If the children were still contagious when he arrived, he could become infected himself. Lying in bed four nights after Neil had first left, she was awoken by the sounds of her own screams from a dream so vivid she could have sworn it was real. "Miz Christy, are you all right?" Ruby Mae asked, reaching her side before the others. Christy sat upright in her bed, not speaking, trembling and covered in sweat. A few seconds later, David, Miss Alice and the Scotts all stood in her doorway, wondering if she was all right. Ruby Mae quickly scurried back into the hall. "She's just had a bad dream is all. I think she's worried `bout Doc MacNeill," Ruby Mae offered helpfully. Miss Alice nodded. Turning to the redhead she said, "Ruby Mae, can you bring Miss Huddleston some chamomile tea? Maybe that will help her." Convinced that Christy was in no harm, the others returned to their rooms. Alice knocked lightly on the door. "Child, may I come in?" "Yes," Christy whispered. She sat with the covers pulled tightly around her, still visibly shaken from her dream. Alice sat down beside her on the bed. "I know thee is worried about Neil. But thy dream does not mean that something bad has happened." She gently stroked Christy's hair as she talked. "Miss Alice, it was terrible. I could see him gasping for air and I couldn't do anything to help him." Just then she saw the pained look on the older woman's face and stopped. "Oh, Miss Alice! I am so sorry! I didn't even think about Margaret…" Alice held up one finger to silence her, "You don't have to apologize. You didn't say anything wrong. I still miss Margaret dearly, but I am grateful to know that in her last weeks she was able to accept the Lord. While my heart mourns for her, my spirit rejoices that she is with God." Just then, Ruby Mae brought up a steaming hot cup of tea. "Drink this, Christy," Miss Alice instructed, "It will help you sleep." Before she closed the door, Alice replied, "Remember, seek faith." Chapter 29 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One more day passed and there was no word from Neil. As Christy was teaching the following afternoon, she heard a familiar voice out in the yard. "U-nited S-tates M-ail!" Dropping her book to the floor, she rushed outside. She wasn't expecting anything, but maybe Ben Pentland had news from Low Gap. Seeing the young schoolteacher at the doorway, he took off his hat. "Mornin' ma'm. Brung you a letter from over Asheville-way." Reaching out to accept the letter, she asked hesitatingly, "Have you heard any word about the illness over in Low Gap?" "Yes, ma'm. Hear tell that they got it right bad. Nigh on seven children got it. They say some of the parents are down with it too. I reckon Doc MacNeill's got his hands full." So he had heard that Neil was there. Her heart racing, she thanked him for the letter and returned inside. ~~~~~~ Another two days passed and Neil was still gone. He had promised he would be back in time for the last day of school, scheduled for the day after tomorrow. As Christy stood dressed in her nightgown and robe on the upper porch of the mission house, she brushed her long hair absentmindedly staring out into the darkness. How she prayed that Neil was all right and would return soon. In the distance, a faint whinny sounded. Her ears strained to listen. Perhaps she had just been hoping for some sign that he was back that she was now hearing things. For a tense moment or two, she listened to her heart pounding so loud she could barely hear anything else. Again she heard it, growing closer. Without thinking, she dropped the brush and raced downstairs. The grass was damp against her bare feet, but she didn't notice. Rushing to the top of the hill she noticed a figure on horseback cresting the rise past the schoolhouse yard. Unconsciously, she screamed, "Neil!" The figure dropped from his horse and in several long strides met her in his open arms. Tears streaming down her face, she hugged him tightly, kissing his face over and over. "I was so worried, Neil. I…I…thought…you…weren't…" Her voice broke as she buried her face in his chest, sobbing uncontrollably. "Hey," Neil said gently, taking her chin in his hand and raising her gaze to meet his, "have I ever broken a promise to you?" She shook her head. "Come now, let's get you back inside," he said, glancing down at her tiny bare feet. Catching Charlie by the reins and wrapping an arm tightly around her, he asked playfully as they walked back toward the mission, "So, do I take this as a sign that you missed me?" She smiled and wiped away the tears still trailing down her face. Standing in a patch of moonlight near the mission she could see the exhaustion carved into Neil's rugged face. Deep circles were etched under his eyes and he looked like he hadn't had a good night's sleep in days. As much as she wanted to stay out here with him, he needed to get some rest. "Neil, you should go home. You look exhausted," she said tenderly. He nodded. "I'll try to sleep all morning if I can. It's a good thing Charlie knows the way back. I tried to snooze a little on the way home, but it certainly doesn't compare to one's own bed. Come by tomorrow afternoon, after school and we can talk then." He kissed her on the forehead, wearily mounted Charlie and disappeared into the darkness. ~~~~~ She was overjoyed at Neil's return and even the children noticed. During lunch, Creed Allen stayed behind the others, fumbling through his desk as if he was looking for something. Looking up, Christy noticed that everyone else had gone outside to eat. "Creed, aren't you going to have lunch?" Obviously nervous, he slowly approached her desk. "Teacher, I wanna ask you to forgiv' me fer somethin'," he said deliberately. "Creed, what on earth for?" "Well, ma'm, I teased Doc MacNeill somethin' fierce `bout courtin' you an' all and I wanna tell ya I'm sorry." Christy smiled softly and reached out to touch the youngster's cheek. "Thank you, Creed. That's very nice." Suddenly, she was struck by an impulse to ask him a question. As he headed down the aisle, swinging his lunch pail along side of him, she called out, "Creed, what made you feel sorry about teasing Dr. MacNeill?" The little boy turned around and responded, "You just look so happy now that he's back an' all. I just figgered that he makes you happy." He shrugged his shoulders and continued down the stairs as Christy held both of her hands to her face in a mixture of joy and amusement. Creed Allen always had a way of surprising her. ~~~~ After school let out, she headed down to Neil's cabin. Gingerly climbing the stairs so as not to disturb him if he were still sleeping, she lightly tapped on the door. Receiving no answer she looked around the porch. Charlie still stood hitched to the post next to the cabin, but Neil's fishing poles were missing. The river! Of course she thought to herself. She made her way down to the river and followed a well-worn path down to his favorite fishing spot. She paused for a moment, just staring at him as he stood knee-deep in the dark moving current, his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Finally, she called out to him, "Neil, I thought I would find you here." He waded back toward the river's edge and hugged her. "It's so good to be back," he replied. "I'm so sorry that you were worried." "No, Neil. I understand how important your job is." "All the same," he replied, "I should have sent word that I was all right. I promise it won't happen in the future. I love being a doctor, but I can't do it at your expense." "You are the only doctor these people have. I can't be selfish and expect you to check in with me every time you are gone longer than you expect to. I'll just have to trust in you and in God that you'll come home safely." "Are you sure, Christy? This is a lot for one person to bear." "Yes, Neil. I knew that you were a doctor when I met you and I understand what that means. I can't promise that I won't worry about you. But I'm not asking you to give up what you love and I'm not willing to give up the man I love either." "Good. That's settled then," he replied. "Why don't you help me catch some dinner," he suggested and handed her his pole. "I'll toss in the other line for myself." She stepped to the edge of the water. Gently pulling on the line to flick the fly back over the surface of the water, she called, "Neil, it seems to be stuck on something." "Just pull it in gently," he suggested, returning to her side. Slowly, she pulled the line back toward the shore. "There's something on the end. It looks like a piece of wood," she commented. "Take it slow, so you won't get hung up on the rocks and break the line," he encouraged. As the object grew closer, she could tell it was indeed a wooden object, a small, carved fish! She reached down into the water to scoop it up and noticed a shiny object dangling from a piece of line that hung beside the carved body. Her eyes flew back to Neil's as she realized it was a sapphire ring. Instantly, Neil took her hands in his, pressing them tight against his chest. Staring into her bright blue eyes, he said, "I love you, Christy. Will you marry me?" "Oh, Neil," she gasped. "Yes, yes, of course I'll marry you." Tears flowed down her face like tiny rivulets as she wept for joy. Taking the carved fish and its tiny treasure from her, he untied the knot and slipped the ring on her finger. Holding her face in his hands, he kissed her over and over covering her face with a shower of gentle kisses. ~~~ As she slipped down off of Charlie's back outside of the mission, she beamed up at Neil. Somehow it did not seem real, but as she stared alternately between the deep blue gem dangling from her chain and the intense blue eyes of the man she loved, she sighed in amazement. On the way back from the river, they had agreed to keep their engagement secret, at least until the recitation tomorrow. Then they would share the news with the entire Cove. In a way, they had all watched their relationship develop and it was only fitting that they should all share in the happy news at the same time. She had wanted to stay with Neil for dinner, but remembered that the others were expecting her and she didn't want them to worry. Leaning over in his saddle, he planted a gentle kiss on her forehead. "Until tomorrow, lass." Tucking the chain inside her blouse, she virtually floated up the stairs into the mission house and quickly freshened up for dinner. Fidgeting in her seat, she kept reaching up to touch the precious jewel nestled against her throat. "If you don't stop squirming, Christy, we're going to think that you are more lovesick than Ruby Mae," David teased, glancing over at the redhead, who shot him a wounded look. Cecile smiled and reached across the table to touch Christy's hand. "Ignore him, Christy. I know what the love of a good man can do for your appetite." Somehow Christy managed to get through dinner without blurting out the good news. She had been the one to suggest to Neil that they wait to announce their engagement until tomorrow, but the thought of holding it silently inside seemed more than she could bear. Maybe this is how Ruby Mae feels, she thought to herself as she took her dishes to the kitchen, silently vowing to be more patient with her on that particular issue. ~~~~~ The next morning she was up at dawn tidying the schoolhouse and making sure that everything was in place for the final recitation. The children began to arrive earlier than usual, accompanied by their proud parents. As she slipped the children into their costumes, she could feel her heart beating faster as she realized that in just a few short hours the entire Cove would know of her engagement. ~~~ Seated next to Neil, Christy and the others watched as Rob introduced the main characters of the play "The Lost Clan." Needless to say, the audience was entranced as they watched their own history unfold before their very eyes. The faces lit up, full of pride as Rob narrated, "Never would they forget their ballads, their highland stories of the occult, their Gaelic superstitions. Always their men would be fighters, quick to the offense, slow to forgive. To their children and their children's children they would hand down their love of race, their personal loyalties, their stubbornnesses, their distrust of government, their servility to no man." The crowd erupted in loud applause, punctuated by hoops and hollers. Rob stood in front of them, tightly clutching his journal, his head held high beaming proudly. Christy stood up and thanked him for a wonderful job. Next came the spelling bees and recitations. Despite her earlier worries that she'd never have time to get everything done, the final recitation was a success. The children performed splendidly and Christy couldn't have been prouder of each and every one. Thanking the children for their hard work and the parents for attending, Christy invited them all join them for refreshments. Dr. MacNeill stood up, moved next to Christy standing near the schoolhouse steps and addressed the people of the Cove. "Just over two years ago, Christy Huddleston left her home in Asheville to come here and teach our children. As skeptical as we may be about outsiders, Christy quickly became a friend to all of us. In these past years, she has come to adopt Cutter Gap as her home and we have adopted her as one of our own. So, it is only fitting that I tell you all here today that there will soon be another official member of the MacNeill clan. I have asked Christy to marry me and she has graciously accepted." The roar from those assembled was nearly deafening as Christy and Neil were swamped by those who offered their congratulations. Fairlight and Jeb were among the first to reach the couple. Hugging her tightly, Fairlight whispered, "Christy, I am so happy for you. You don't know how I've prayed for this day to come ever since we talked that day on the mountain." Chapter 30 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Slowly the group made its way back to the mission as people continued to give their congratulations to the couple. Neil stood proudly next to his bride-to-be, his arm wrapped lovingly around her small shoulders. As they turned to follow the group to the mission, he felt a tap on his arm. Turning around they stood face to face with David. His face was somber for a moment and then a sparkle came to his eyes as he grasped Neil's hand. "You're a very lucky man, MacNeill. I hope we can let bygones be bygones." "Of course, David. It's all forgotten." He patted him soundly on the shoulder and they all continued walking together to the mission. ~~~~~~~~ Christy had promptly phoned her parents to share the good news. Her father was delighted but not surprised. Her mother, on the other hand, seemed overjoyed. For Christy the next several weeks flew by. During that time, she and Neil discussed the details of the wedding. She insisted that they marry in the Cove. A large church wedding at home in Asheville just didn't feel right. She wanted to be here, surrounded by the people she had come to call friends and in the place she had made her home. "When do you want to get married, lass," Neil asked. "I've always loved the fall. The trees are so beautiful and it gives us enough time to plan things. I'd love to marry you tomorrow, but Mother would be fit to be tied." "All right then, a fall wedding you shall have. Are there any dates you have in mind?" She thought for a moment and then shook her head. "What about October 8th," he suggested. A smile stole across her face. "Neil, that's perfect. It's exactly…" "Exactly three years to the day since you first came to Cutter Gap. Hopefully you'll be able to stand our wedding far better than you did Bob Allen's surgery," he replied playfully. She gave him a disparaging look but hugged him tightly. ~~~~~~~~ That summer was hotter than anyone in Cutter Gap could remember in years. Christy spent her time as she usually did--helping to tend to the mission garden, taking care of the animals and planning lessons for the upcoming year with Cecile. One particularly hot August afternoon, she and Fairlight walked together to the creek near her house. Sitting on the smooth black rocks, they dangled their feet in the cool mountain water. "Fairlight, I'm nervous about marrying Neil. I want so much to be a good wife and mother like you are, but I don't know where to begin." "You love him don't you?" "Of course, I do. I love him with my entire heart and soul." "Well, then. That's where you start," she said matter-of-factly, a smile on her face. Christy smiled as the two women continued to swing their feet back and forth in the moving water. ~~~~~~~~~ Summer was reluctant to give up its hold on Cutter Gap as September's nights continued hot and sweltering, making sleep nearly impossible. Christy lay in bed unable to sleep, anxiously awaited her parent's arrival from Asheville on the morning train. Her mother had assured her that she would take care of procuring a wedding dress and silently Christy prayed that her mother would remember that a dress appropriate for an Asheville wedding would not be suitable for the Cove. As with most brides, Christy had dreamed of her wedding day since childhood but never imagined that she could be happier than she was right now. The following morning, Christy stood with Miss Alice on the El Pano platform awaiting the arrival of her mother and father. Their eyes scanned the crowd as the train pulled into the station and the passengers emerged. Suddenly, she heard a cheery baritone voice above the loud exhaling of the steam engine, "Little miss!" "Daddy," she cried and ran into her father's waiting arms. He lifted her feet off the ground and swung her around him joyfully. Seeing Miss Alice's smiling face just yards away, he quickly set her back down on her feet. "Sorry, Christy. I didn't mean to embarrass you in front of Miss Alice." "You did nothing of the sort, Daddy," she replied, kissing him soundly on the cheek and hugging him tightly. "Don't you have a hug for your mother, Christy?" She spun around to see her mother being helped down from the train. "Momma!" she replied gleefully, kissing her on the cheek and giving her a warm hug. "Christy, I've brought you some things for the wedding. Now I don't want you to fuss because I'm certain that you will find them in good taste." Miss Alice approached the group hesitatingly and said her hellos to Christy's mother and father. "We have a wagon waiting to take us back to the Cove. I'm certain you must be famished after your long trip." ~~~~~ During the rest of the afternoon, Christy and her mother discussed the plans for the wedding. Having written about Neil's romantic proposal, Christy eagerly told her mother about their idea to marry beside the river. Julia Huddleston, ever the pragmatist, but nevertheless a romantic at heart, loved the idea. "And on the date that you first came to the Cove too, how charming! I wish the young men back home were half as romantic as your dear Neil." "What do you think about the idea of having an arch covered in wildflowers?" "A splendid idea. Your father and David can probably build one in less than an afternoon. It's a good thing too because the wedding is just a week away after all." Standing up, Julia Huddleston walked over to the bed where she had placed a long box earlier, inviting Christy to join her. Before her daughter opened it, Julia said, "Christy, I know that you want something special for your wedding day. I hope you like it." As Christy removed the top, she saw a simple yet beautiful white dress with delicate lace at the hem. Speechless, she stood there staring at the dress as if it would disappear. Her mother gingerly lifted it out of the box and held it up to Christy as she stood across from the mirror. "It's your grandmother's wedding dress, dear. I saw you wearing it one day when you came back home last year so I knew it would fit you." Tears welled in Christy's eyes as she remembered that day. Not long after she had returned home to Asheville last fall, she was rummaging through boxes in the attic looking for old books that the children might enjoy. Seeing her grandmother's old steamer trunk, she reluctantly opened it, not knowing if she could handle seeing what she knew lay inside. Ever since she was a little girl, she had dreamed of wearing that very dress on her wedding day. Now, with Margaret back and Neil gone forever out of her life, seeing it made her sad. Nevertheless, for old time's sake she had slipped it on, staring at her image in the oval floor length mirror and wondering what might have been. Her mother's only concession to city niceties was that she insisted on having a photographer present at the ceremony. "Mother," Christy pleaded, "it is so extravagant. I just don't think that it's necessary." "I don't want to hear any more talk like that, young lady. I am quite certain that this will be the only wedding that you'll have and I want to preserve this day for posterity. If not for your sake, at least for your children." Christy blushed. "All right, Mother," she conceded. ~~~~~ As their wedding day drew closer, Christy and her mother visited with the women of the Cove. The first person that Julia Huddleston asked to see was Swannie O'Teale who was still staying at the mission. "Mrs. O'Teale, I was so sorry to learn about your daughter." Swannie reached out and placed a work-worn hand on Julia's sleeve. "I thank ya kindly for that, ma'am. Miz Christy's helped us out a pile since it all happened ya know." Christy's mother smiled in gratitude. Since her last visit to Cutter Gap nearly two years ago, Julia Huddleston had realized the hold these people had on her daughter. Although she had first fought against it, Julia realized that Christy's place was here with the children and their parents and inwardly she scolded herself for ever thinking differently. ~~~ On Tuesday morning just three short days before Christy and Neil's wedding, Miss Alice invited the ladies of the Cove to their usual sewing circle meeting and invited Julia Huddleston to join them. Unable to meet in the summer because of the unbearable heat, the women of the Cove seemed unusually restless. Thankfully the weather was getting cooler, Christy thought to herself. Perhaps that's what was making them so fidgety. As they stopped for refreshments, Granny Barclay asked Christy to stay behind and help her put away her sewing. Christy agreed while the other women headed inside to the mission parlor. Their job accomplished, Christy and Granny Barclay went inside. As she opened the door, she saw that the room was filled with vases of wildflowers. "Did you think that we'd let ye get married without a proper shower," Fairlight asked. Christy was stunned. The table was covered in gifts and the women stood around it beaming. Miss Alice pointed to the items on the table, "The jars of apple butter are from Opal. Fairlight made this beautiful quilt. The dried herbs are from Swannie O'Teale." She held up a small pillow embroidered with the initials N and C intertwined, "Ruby Mae made this." Miss Alice's voice continued as tears flowed freely down Christy's face. ~~~ As she showed the items later that afternoon to Neil, she beamed. "They are so generous! I can't believe that they did all of this for us!" Reaching for the small cast iron frying pan whose donor had not been identified, she remarked, "Apparently someone doesn't know about your little saying." "Well lass, that person must think that you deserved both the dance and the frying pan," he responded seriously. Christy could contain herself no longer as she realized that Neil was behind the thoughtful gesture and they both burst into laughter. ~~~~~~ The evening before their wedding, Christy stood in the gazebo staring out at the moonlit mountains. She could hardly believe that in less than 24 hours she was going to be Mrs. Neil MacNeill. They had both gone through so much together to get to this point, but she couldn't be happier. Lost in her thoughts of a small boy with his father's unruly sandy curls and his mother's big blue eyes, a voice suddenly sounded behind her. "What are you thinking about, lass?" Christy turned around and smiled softly, a little embarrassed that he had caught her daydreaming. "None of your business, Neil MacNeill. Why must you be so nosy?" Her voice sounded stern, but she had a twinkle in her eye. He hugged her tightly and then leaned back to look at her. "Well, I hope it was about our future together." He squinted and looked deeper into her eyes, "Aye, it was." She looked at him, shocked for a second that he had so clearly read her thoughts. "So I was right, wasn't I? Don't worry, love, I've been thinking about the same thing," he smiled, the corners of his eyes wrinkling. He pulled a small leather bag out of his pocket. "I have something for you, for tomorrow." She looked at him quizzically. He had already given her a beautiful sapphire engagement ring. What could this possibly be? She gasped as she removed a small gold brooch--two intertwined hearts with a crown at the top. "Oh, Neil. It's beautiful!" "It has been in my family since before we came from Scotland. It's a luckenbooth pin. They were originally sold at the locked booths around St. Giles Cathedral in Edinburgh. Traditionally there are a sign of betrothal." He paused and smiled mischievously, "It's also tradition to pin them on the baby's blanket. Maybe that little boy with curly hair and his mother's beautiful eyes that you were thinking about earlier?" She looked at him in amazement. "Although, I wouldn't mind a little girl to dote on either," he continued, hugging her closer. She turned the pin over and noticed the engraving. "What does it say, Neil?" "The translation is `Of all earthly joys, thou art my choice.' As I was the oldest, my mother gave it to me before she died. She told me to save it for the woman that I loved above all others. I know she'd be proud for you to wear it." He paused, looking tenderly at the woman who was about to become his bride. He smiled softly, gently stroking her cheek with his hand and continued, "I never showed it to Margaret. I knew that she'd think it silly, a stupid old tradition. I now know that I was saving it for you. Christy, I never loved her the way that I love you. How could I? I couldn't really be free to love anyone until I felt worthy of love in return. You helped me to see that. I realized that if you loved me and if God loved me, then I must not be the undeserving person I feared I was. You've given me so much." The right words escaped him and instead he cradled her in his arms, never wanting to let her go. ~~~~~~ Because it would be too far for Christy to ride on horseback, or by wagon for that matter, in her wedding gown, Neil had graciously offered Christy and her mother the use of his cabin. Ordered not to leave David's bunkhouse or look out the windows, Neil waited pacing back and forth with nervous energy. "Lord Almighty, Neil," Jeb Spencer, who was to serve as his friend's best man, commented, "you're gonna wear a hole straight through them boards by the time the weddin' starts." ~~~~ A knock sounded at Dr. MacNeill's cabin door. Her mother opened it gingerly making sure that it was not Neil. "May I see Christy for a moment," a male voice asked. David strode in, clad in his long black jacket and stiff white collar. He bent down in front of Christy who was seated at a small table. He beamed as he looked at her. "Christy," he said, his voice faltering, "you are the most beautiful bride I have ever seen." She smiled back at him. "Now don't you go getting nervous on me here. I have it on good authority that there is a certain doctor that is waiting for you out there and he's nervous enough for both of you," he said pointing over his shoulder toward the river. He stood up but Christy also stood, catching him gently by the arm. "David," she said, "Thank you." She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered softly, "I love you. Don't you ever forget that." He pulled away and kissed her on the forehead. "I love you too. Now hurry up, Teacher. I've got a wedding to perform" he said happily and walked out of the room. ~~~~ Christy and her father approached the group gathered by the side of the river. Two rows of her friends and family marked the path to the river's edge and her soon-to-be husband. Her schoolchildren, barefoot yet dressed in their Sunday best, smiled at her from either side of the aisle. Wearing her grandmother's wedding dress, Neil's brooch, and her mother's pearl earrings, she had something old, something new and something borrowed. Her sapphire engagement ring would have to do for something blue, she thought, only slightly disappointed that she was not strictly adhering to tradition. Suddenly a small girl darted to Christy's side. Mountie! "For you, Teacher," Mountie said. Holding out her hand, she deposited a small blue button in Christy's open palm. Christy knelt down, oblivious to the fact that her dress was dragging in the dirt and hugged her tightly. "Thank you, Mountie," she replied and kissed her on the cheek. As Christy started down the aisle on her father's arm, Neil exhaled deeply. She was more beautiful than he had ever seen her. Her long brown hair hung loose, curling around her shoulders. She wore a simple white dress and carried a bouquet of mountain wildflowers. Their gaze locked, her bright blue eyes staring at him, as if no one else were there. Neil beamed as he noticed that on her head she wore a crown of dried goldenrod. She had saved it! Months earlier, walking together in a meadow, she had asked him if he finally had forgiven Margaret. Now, standing by the river watching his beautiful bride walk down the aisle on her father's arm, he realized that he had. Not only had he forgiven Margaret, he had forgiven himself. Christy and God had helped him do that. He beamed as they reached his side. Her father kissed her gently on the cheek. Turning to Neil, he whispered, "Take good care of my little miss." "Don't worry, William. I plan to spend the rest of my life doing just that," Neil replied as he stared deeply into Christy's eyes. THE END Written by Charlotte