Title: Flames of life- mini fic Author: Dawn R. Flames of life Disclaimer A: The characters of The flames of RomanceChristy belong to the Lesourd family. This story is purely ridiculous read it and laugh! Don’t try this at home! If you are weak of knees you are hereby admonished to not read this. If you are prone to swoon sit down! <><><><><><><><><>< Part 1-100 Christy stood glazing into the ring box. my what a lovely ring. Dear sweet David how much he must have spent. How can i say no to his genorosity. Looking up she saw Dr MacNeil. Oh Neil my Bonnie Prince. No he has Margaret now. What was it Fairlight..dear sweet simple Fairlight. Yes she and jeb are well suited. They have the same last name after all. But what was it she said this morning. What ever should I do. “David, this is a beautifull ring and I see you have sacrificed to buy ! it.” As she sucked in her breath she could hear hoof beats approaching. Turning around she watched Neil light off his horse. “Teachur teachur, fire!” the children yelled. “Quick David get a bucket! David! What are you doing standing there? Can’t you see Doctor mac neil is ablaze.” Christy yelled as she threw her shawl over Neil and began patting him down. Before she could think she was being doused by the childrens buckets. Cold and wet Christy lifted herself up and looked at the still transfixed David. Neil rising along side her none the worse for wear began. “ Man what are you standing there for get us some towels. Come on Christy lets get to the mission to dry off.” As they scampered off David stood transfixed to the spot. Dear Lord what happened? Why didn’t I move. What kind of a man watches this unmoving. I need to get out of here. With determination he raced off to cross the red tape. The thrill of the victory was s! oon replaced by the agony of the feet. OoH! My toes i must have stubbed them on those ugly branches. Whimpering he sat and pondered. Think think think he tapped his head. I think that I am hungry. Wheres my honey pot. *************** “I don’t understand Neil what happened? I mean one minute you were atop then the next you were alight!” “Aye Lass, before E except after C. You are right handed on that. I do not know what happened. Wait! Margaret must have slipt some kindling on the saddle. She was puffy with steam when i said I was going after you. She shot daggers at me when I wouldn’t come back to her.” “Perhaps neil in the future you should give her back her eyes when she rolls.” “Not uh I won fair and square at our game.” As they dried themselves off in front of the fire each were left o their own thoughts. Christy that lass she really keeps me hopping..ow ow ow! “Back up Neil someone left popcorn in the fireplace.”! “HMM! It does smell good though.” “Neil must you speak of food at a time like this?!” As they sat further back in silence they were again left to mull over their existence. “To err is human.” Christy mused. “to be or not to be.. i think therefore I am! But what is he? Animal vegetable or mineral. Oh and what of David? Why did he stand there? I mean he could of at least got some marshmellows. But I have to know..”Neil why did you come back? I told you to go back to your wife.” “Christy how could I go back to me wife. She died years ago. i was only hugging her. Gee sue me over it. it didn’t mean anything. Read my lips. I never had any relations with that women.” “Neil you sound like a gaggle of politicians in the future.” Christy spoke mockingly. “But level with me. Pretty please with sugar on top. I’ll stay your best friend.” “Will you.. Honest?! I always wanted a best friend. Mama sold my teddy when we had no money. And I never found a better friend. charlie has tried but he always has hoof and mouth. Do you ever have hoof and mouth. oh but i’m a doctor i can help you. I come in peace.” “Neil MacNeil you are the silliest man to ever be flummoxed by me! By the way what is that? And why do you speak of frying pans all the time? Honeslty you get me all tonguee tripped.” “Carefull there lass Let me have a look at that tongue. Hmm as I thought. Its all covered with bumps. I suggest you soak it in river water for 3 weeks. Now put it back in your mouth and let me check.. oh just as I suspected. Just how many unattended owees have you had miss? I can see one here..” As he reached over to plant a kiss on her the door swung open.. “OWWWWWWW!! My toes! I need a doctor stat! Not you! I thought you were toast! I even went for honey to top you with.” As the duet stood in awe they began to ooh and eeh in unison. “David Grantland I t! hank you not to interupt my exam. Doctor Mac Neil was just administering my medication. So take a number! Now where were we..” “Bang! Little rats little rats let me in” “Not by the hair of my heady head head” “Then i’ll huff and i’ll cough and I’ll sneeze you all out.” “Go ahead make my day!” With that margaret huffed, puffed, and sneezed down the roof. She then broke down into a coughing spasm and collapsed on the porch. David raced out to revive her. “NO NO NO margaret you can’t die!” he cried out. “Now we won’t get a nifty web site! Oh i’m so mad whaa whaa whaa. Its not fair mom always did like you best.” “Reverend what are you saying?” “How am i supposed to know can’t you see I’m upset. Now where was I.. Oh yeah whaa whaa whaa. I want my mommy!” “MAn control youself! Pray or something! God hearya. he heard me.” “Neil you believe in God? You know he loves you and died for you.” “Of course Christy when I was all abl! aze i remembered the story of meshack shadrack amnd abednegoe. I threw out the fleece. I told God if he was as real as my mama always taught me I’d put my trust in him. I’ve been runnin too long. I give up” “Oh Neil I’m so.. so happy!” She squealed and jumped into his arms. “Whoa lass. Lets roll back the tape here. First we need a license. Oh and a blood test. SO sit still while I administer the needle. Now It will take two days to get ready. Can you wait?” “Yes! Oh and don’t forget to call my daddy. We must be proper about this. Oh and Hey Davey boy will you do the honors.” “Sure why not nobody likes me anyway. i’ll go staple my tail back on.” “NOW David Grantland pick yourself up brush yourself off and start all over again.” As he stood up and brushed the dirt from his trousers he started in ‘Why I reckon i’d be plumb honored to be hitchin you to yung’uns.” “Ah David. YOUR SO SWEET! Oh and heres your ring back. I gu! ess you know my answer. I’m sorry. But I’m sure you’ll meet someone who will love you more than i ever could or would or should.” ************************ The blood tests came back clear. But alas they opted to wait a week so as to bring all of Christy’s kin in from Asheville. The cutter ladies rolled up there sleeves and provided quite the feast. Finally the dreamt of day arrived. Christy in Ashevilles finest lace strolled down the aisle on her daddies arm. Ruby mae and Fairlight-dear sweet fairlight were her attendents. Jeb and Daniel Scott were Neils. ALl went well until the final admonition I now pro-- “Bang! Whats going on here? What art thous doing with thees people? Where be-ist my daughter? Oh I’m so confused!” As the quaker woman fell forward Uncle Bogg sprinted to her and caught her. ALl breathed a sigh of relief. “Why Bogg what big arms you have!” Alice said as she came to smiling with sparkles in her e! yes. He looked at her with *that* look. And everything else went blank. *************** “Now as I was saying....w pronounce you husband and wife you may now kiss the bride.” With that they...well you fill in the blanks... The End-or is it just the beggining!