TITLE: "Doors of Rejoicing...Doors of Regret" [Continuation of The Road Home] Author: Rose M e-mail: irish_rose71@yahoo.com Disclaimer: Catherine Marshall's beautiful story of Christy is owned by the LeSourd Family. I am in no way seeking profit or credit for her story. I am merely continuing the story of Christy for my own amusement only. Any additions to the storyline were invented by me. Acknowledgement: I thank God for Catherine Marshall and her story of "Christy", for it has meant a great deal to me and others. And I thank the LeSourd family for their patience with those of us who refuse to find "The End" to "Christy". Chapter 1 Christy stood in the schoolyard, cradling the ring box with trembling hands, gazing at the twinkling diamond. This ring represented David's love for her. She could accept David's offer of marriage...she would accept it. There was no reason she shouldn't, now that Neil and Margaret... Then the pounding of horse hooves rang through the hills. Christy look up to see Neil, his hair wildly disheveled, astride his black horse. No words were needed between them. Their eyes spoke volumes. Christy's thoughts brought tears to her eyes. *Truly, my heart is breaking.* Time stood still as Christy looked from David to Neil...David...Neil...then everything went black. As her knees gave way she collapsed into a heap on the ground. "Christy!" David was already at her side, but Neil bounded off the horse and rushed to Christy. The doctor scooped her into his strong arms and strode quickly and purposely towards the mission house. "Alice!" Neil's booming voice carried across the schoolyard and the mission house door flew open. Alice gasped at the sight of Christy's still form cradled in Neil's arms, then stepped back so that Neil could enter and carry Christy upstairs to her bedroom. "What has happened? Christy? Is she hurt?" she queried David as he followed Neil into the house. "She just fainted...or something." David looked down into his hand which held the ring box that he had retrieved when it fell from Christy's fingers. Alice's eyes followed David's to the small blue box, then returned to the young preacher's face. "David?" "I asked her...again... to marry me. Alice, you know how I feel about Christy. Everyone knows how I feel. We were doing fine, she was ready to say ‘Yes', then MacNeill rode up and confused her. She just... collapsed." "The children?" Alice looked outside at the children, who were still standing, stunned, in the schoolyard. The littlest ones were crying. Alice turned back to David. "Perhaps it would be best for thee to return to the schoolhouse. The children must be quite unnerved to have witnessed this spectacle. Neil will be examining Christy for any injuries. I will come to thee, David, when Christy's condition is known." David knew he should go to the children. His eyes focused at the top of the steps where he has last seen Christy's still form. Then he nodded and slowly made his way out the door and across the schoolyard. Alice gathered a cloth and a basin of water, then proceeded upstairs. There she found Neil just finishing his examination of Christy. To make her more comfortable, he had unbuttoned the top buttons of Christy's blouse, loosened her belt, and removed her shoes. When he heard Alice enter the room, Neil turned to her. "Alice, bring some...oh, good, you have water and a cloth. Christy is unconscious." Together Neil and Alice sponged Christy's forehead and wrists with cool water. Minutes ticked by with no response. Soon it had been an hour that they had been at the task. "Neil. If this was just a faint, shouldn't Christy have come out of it by now?" Alice's eyes watched Neil's face for any flicker of concern. Neil examined Christy again, listening to her heartbeat, taking her pulse, peering under her eyelids. Finally, casting a stricken look at Alice, Neil answered her. "Christy is in a semi-comatose state. She isn't responding to touch. Her eyes are not responding to light. I do not know why she's exhibiting these symptoms." His gaze returned to Christy's face. "My theory is that Christy experienced such a great shock of mental anguish that her body responded by shutting down, to an extent. In this way she is not conscious of the thoughts that caused her so much turmoil. All that, plus she also seems to be developing a fever." Neil ran his hands through his unruly curls. "Alice! My God! I brought this on! Christy came to my cabin, only to find Margaret and I in an embrace. Margaret came to plead with me to take her back. She broke down and cried over her fear of dying. She threw her arms around me and wept on my shoulder. I stood there, unable to respond to Margaret at all. But Christy witnessed Margaret's embrace. I can only imagine what she thought. Oh, Alice! You know that Christy is my life! I could not let her believe that Margaret and I were together again! I followed Christy on my horse and arrived just as David was proposing marriage! It was all just too much for her. She just crumpled right before my eyes. Christy! Oh, Lass!" Neil covered his face. Alice turned to Neil with a compassionate touch to his hand. "Neil, thee must not blame thyself. What has happened, has happened. Now we must work to bring Christy back to us. We must ‘all' love her back. I must go tell David about Christy. I promised him I would. Neil, thee must have faith. God has Christy in his arms." When Neil was alone with Christy he set aside the wet cloth and wrapped his fingers firmly around her limp hand. "Ah, Lass. If what Alice says is true, then you are truly in a safe place. Maybe that's where you need to be right now. I never meant to hurt you, Christy. If you love David, then go to him. Your happiness is everything to me. Before I'd do anything to cause you more pain, Christy, I'd sooner just leave you. I would rather just walk through the door..." Chapter 2 "...Walk through the door....walk through the door...walk through the door." Christy was in a land of swirling mists. Colors were dulled to brown sepia tones. Then the mists parted and Christy saw four doors before her. She was drawn to the doors. "I should walk through one of the doors?" Dreamlike, she stepped forward to the first door and swung it open. The door led into the parlor of her parents' home in Asheville. As if watching a moving picture, Christy observed her mother, with grayed hair, serving tea to...an older Christy! ***** "Christy, dear, you work too hard. And that school! Really, dear, I understood when you taught in Cutter Gap why you had to work with ‘poor' children. You have been back home here in Asheville for these ten years. Don't you think you could work at a more proper school, perhaps the girls' school that you attended, rather than at that school by the flats. The people there! My word! I just hate to travel through that section of town!" Her mother went on and on while she served Christy tea and some cookies. Christy's attention left her mother's words as thoughts invaded her mind. *Some things just never change. I thought she understood my vocation to teach the underprivileged when I lived in the Cove, but she really didn't. Now that I've been home all these years, she seems to harp more and more on the respectability, or lack thereof, of my school. I love my children there, just as much as I loved Ruby Mae, Mountie, Sam Houston, Rob...* Christy's eyes filled with tears. It was like this whenever she allowed herself to get emotional over her former students. Most of the time she could remember them without tears, but today had been more stressful than usual at her school, and she wasn't prepared to check her emotions before memories of the Cove began to flood her mind. "Mother, we've been over this time and time again. I am not just a teacher. I have a calling to teach the young who cannot help their own dire situations," Christy spoke with conviction. Julia looked chagrined until she noticed her daughter's teary eyes. Unaware of Christy's thoughts and thinking she would change the subject, Mrs. Huddleston asked, "Christy, have you heard from Alice Henderson recently? How are things at the mission in Cutter Gap?" Christy dabbed a lacy handkerchief to each eye, took a deep breath and steeled herself for the conversation, turned to her mother with a smile and replied, "I had a letter just last week. Things are always quite busy in the Cove. Ruby Mae informed me in her last letter that she is expecting her third child. She and Will are hoping for a girl this time." Christy chuckled, "According to Ruby Mae, a girl would be a relief from those two wild sons she has, but if the daughter has any of her mother in her, I think Ruby Mae is in for quite a surprise! " Julia smiled at Christy in agreement at the thought another little "Ruby Mae". Christy continued, "Three of my former students have finished college now. That is my greatest joy, that Rob, Zach and Zady finally made their dreams come true of going on to college and acquiring fine jobs." She paused to sip the fragrant tea. "The preacher, the one who replaced David, recently married his girlfriend from home. She is fitting in nicely at Cutter Gap, according to Miss Alice, although I understand there are many heartbroken mothers in his hometown who had hoped the preacher would marry their own daughter." Christy blushed when she realized what she had just said! Her own mother had entertained hopes of Christy's acceptance of David Grantland's proposal of marriage, and was terribly disappointed when Christy had turned him down for the final time. "Christy, dear, do you know that your face mirrors your thoughts? I will admit that at one time I did believe that you should marry Reverend Grantland, but I realize that had been my dream, not yours. It has all turned out for the best anyway. David is back in Boston, married to his childhood sweetheart, and you are back home with us! Now, what news is there of the doctor?" Christy's heart skipped a beat, and she recovered with the words, "Oh, Dan Scott was finally accepted by the people of Cutter Gap. You remember that he decided to stay on in the Cove after... His medical practice goes well. Although he never received a medical degree, he learned everything from...well, he did learn everything he needed to know. You remember I told you that he married his fiancé from Kentucky. They have two daughters now, Esther and Ruth. He and his family feel at home in Cutter Gap, after all this time. Dan..." "Christy," her mother interrupted, "You know I meant Doctor MacNeill, not Dan Scott. Is there any news of him? Hasn't he been living in Baltimore for many years now? Actually, Christy, my question is this: do you have any regrets about Dr. Neil MacNeill?" Christy stood and made her way to the window, tears pooling in her deep blue eyes as she gazed into the Huddleston garden. *Regrets?* she thought. *Do I have regrets?* Chapter 3 Christy backed away from the first door, closing it quietly. *That was very strange,* she thought, *To see myself as an older woman, to see my mother as aged, to think of Neil...living in Baltimore...!* Christy proceeded to the second door, and hesitated before opening it. *Where will this door lead?* she wondered, as the door swung open to her touch... ******** Christy was seated in a formal parlor, having her morning coffee. A lyrical voice was heard from upstairs, "Mother, did you ever find my navy blue hair bow? Oh, here it is. Never mind, Mummy. Oh, I'm so excited..." Christy smiled to herself as she pictured her daughter, Megan, flying around her bedroom. "The preparations for the first day of high school are so serious to her," Christy mused. Christy heard someone enter the room and looked up to see that it was her husband. How handsome he looked with his wavy, gray-streaked dark brown hair, and his moustache made him look so distinguished. "Are we doing the right thing, do you think, my dear?" David asked as he sat down in the chair across from Christy's. "It's still not too late to enroll her in the private girls' school that my sisters attended." He frowned with worry. Christy reached across to touch her husband's hand. "Don't worry, David. Megan will be fine at the co-ed school. She is so excited to be attending there. Please don't let her know of your worries." She squeezed his hand until he looked into his wife's face. "She will do fine!" "I worry too much, I always have," he began, but the thought was left unfinished as a girl with waist length, glossy, sable-brown hair tied with a blue ribbon blew through the room, rushing in with a flurry and then out the same way. "She's so like you, David." Christy smiled after her daughter. "Like ME! What do you mean?" "Oh, your dark hair, and she's tall like you. I'm the shorty of the family now that she's grown so tall! The only thing she has of me is her blue eyes." "Christy, Megan is just like YOU! She has your spirit, your zest for life! She's engaging, she's joyful, she's..." His voice broke off when they heard sweet singing from upstairs. "Well, my love, one thing Megan does not have of yours is your singing voice, though I do love it so!" "You, and only you, love my singing!" Christy laughed. David, suddenly pensive, quietly questioned, "Christy, I've always wondered. Do you have any regrets about your life? Do you ever wish you had done things differently, made a different choice?" Christy knew that David was referring to her decision to marry him. Sweet David. He had been a good husband to her. But had she any regrets? Christy began to let herself remember that day in the schoolyard, when she was thoughtfully poised with David and Neil looking on. Then she realized she was taking awhile in answering her husband, so she quickly said, "Oh, David, I do love my life, helping you with your ministry here in Boston. How could I not love it, and you and Megan? I do regret that I could give you only one child. I'm sorry for that, David. I'm so sorry..." "No, Christy. That couldn't be helped. The complications after Megan's birth, those were out of your control. Please, don't ever think I have held that against you. You and Megan are my life, all that I have ever wanted." David moved from his chair to grasp Christy's hands in his. Then the young female whirlwind blew through the room again. "Daddy! Please, are you finally ready? We must go or I'll be late! I mustn't be late my first day! Oh, Mummy, here's a kiss good-bye! Wish me well! Come, Daddy, hurry!" and she was gone in a flourish. David and Christy looked at each other and broke into laughter. "Well, I guess I'VE been holding her up all along! Good-bye, my love. I'm off to take our daughter to her first day of high school. Life, I think, will never be the same for our little family again!" David kissed Christy good-bye, then hurried out the door to catch up with his thoroughly excited daughter. Christy smiled as she thought, "And the high school will never be the same after my Megan arrives there!" Her thoughts continued. "Megan, my pride and joy. I do know what that phrase means now. I didn't before having my own beloved daughter. She's growing up so fast. Why, she is almost the age I was when I went to Cutter Gap! How amazing!" Christy poured herself another cup of coffee, and let her thoughts wander while stirring cream into her cup. She wandered to the window. Christy gazed out the window, still and pensive. Now that she was alone in the room, Christy allowed herself to consider David's question. Her eyes filed with tears. "Regrets?" she whispered. "Do I have regrets?" Chapter 4 *David and I? And a daughter?* Christy's thoughts were slightly disturbing as she closed the door to the Boston home, then turned to face the third door. *I wonder where this door leads?* was her thought as her hand touched the doorknob. ********* The door led into the Cutter Gap mission house! It seemed so familiar and welcoming after the last two doors. Christy looked in... A woman with a long gray braid turned from the table and smiled at her friend as she said, "Christy, will thee ever learn to cook with out burning some part of the meal?" she teased. Christy looked up from her position bending over the open oven door, from which was swirling a bit of black smoke. "Oh, Alice. You haven't given up on me yet, have you? Actually, my cooking isn't so bad, it's my baking that needs improving. It's only been...what...twelve years since you've been trying to teach me how to bake? Thank the Lord, it didn't take that long for me to learn how to be a teacher to the wonderful children here I the Cove!" The two friends laughed together, and just as the laughter was dying down, came another puff of burning smoke. Christy took one look at Alice and they both collapsed in laughter. A knock at the door went unheard, so the visitor opened it and peeked in. "Hello. Christy? Miz Alice? Lordamercy! What is that burnin' smell?" A pregnant Ruby Mae walked into the room with four freckle-faced, red-headed children in tow. "Christy, are you trying to bake again? You'd best just stick to school teachin'." Christy reached out to take all four little ones into a big bear hug. "Oh! How are my favorite god-children today? Do you want a cookie?" "Well, Miz Christy," replied the oldest, Will, Jr., speaking up for all the children, "Did you or Miz Alice bake ‘em?" This set all three women into peals of laughter. "Oh, I almost forgot," Ruby Mae handed a letter to Alice, then another to Christy. "I saw Ben Pentland on the way over and offered to deliver the mission mail. I guess I should've announced my comin' like he does, "Hell-oooo! U-nited States Mail!" The children giggled at this, to see their mother impersonate old Mr. Pentland. She handed a letter to each of the mission women. Alice pressed cookies into each child's pudgy hand before sending them outside to play. "Ruby Mae, sit down and rest thyself awhile. Let me get thee a cup of tea, dear." Meanwhile, Christy had opened her letter. It was from David. She know the other women were curious, so she read aloud, "He says all is well at his church ministry in Boston. His three children are growing, and the two oldest girls are singing in the children's choir at his church. They must have been blessed with beautiful voices like their mother. He has heard from Ida and Clarence that their orange grove has been so successful they have been able to purchase even more land in Anaheim, and are offering some to David and his wife. What a decision for David. To stay in Boston or move to be near his last surviving relative. He had written after the deaths of his parents, that his children miss their grandparents so! It wouldn't surprise me if they do pick up and move to be close to Ida and Clarence." She scanned the rest of the note. "There really isn't any more news. Just who's had sniffles, and such." Christy looked up from the pages to her two good friends and smiled. "I'm proud of David. He's seemed to have made a good life for himself. I hope all the best for David and his family." "Christy, I've always wondered ‘bout it," Ruby Mae began slowly, "Do ya ever wish you'd a married Preacher?" Christy returned Ruby Mae's gaze steadily. "No, Ruby Mae. As much as I loved David, I finally realized that my love for him was not the binding love needed for a good marriage. Eventually, he, too, came to that realization." Ruby Mae turned to Alice. "Now your letter, Miz Alice. I seen ya put it in your apron pocket. No need fer ya to save it for later. I seen it was from Baltimore. Must be from Doc MacNeill. Why don't ya open it and share his news with us, like Christy did Preacher's?" Alice looked to Christy. The older woman was always so careful when she received news from Neil. She read the letters in the privacy of her room so as not to cause Christy any discomfort. Christy returned Alice's questioning look with a slight nod. "Go ahead, Alice. Let's hear what Doctor MacNeill has to say." Alice carefully peeled the envelope flap open, then slowly began to remove the page. "Lordamercy, Miz Alice, can't ya get that thing open any faster? If'n it was my letter, I'd have had it all torn open by now!" Ruby Mae had grown up, gotten married, and become a mother, four - soon to be five - times now, but she had never lost her impulsiveness. Alice smiled at Ruby Mae and opened the thin sheet to read Neil's news. Her face lit up. "He says there's been some kind of breakthrough in his research, after all these years. He had almost given up hope on finding a true cure for trachoma, but there has been some progress that has renewed his vigor to proceed. His patients keep him busy with the rest of his time. His health is well. That's about it." Alice folded the letter and returned it to her pocket. She had her eyes on Christy, trying to gauge the younger woman's reaction to the letter. "That's ALL? He only wrote about his work? Well, how's HE doin', Miz Alice. After all, it's been fixin' on five years now that his wife finally died." Ruby Mae clapped her hands over her mouth. "Oh! Miz Alice, I'm sooo sorry! I shouldn'ta never said that. I plum fergot Miz MacNeill was yur daughter, and all. I was just wonderin', has the doc ever thought of comin' back to the Cove? Or of marryin' again? Or did he ever say if'n he has any girlfriends? Or..." "Ruby Mae." Alice scolded the red-headed woman while trying to sneak a glance at Christy. "That is Doctor MacNeill's personal business. He doesn't share that part of his life with me. I only know that he is quite settled in Baltimore now, and I no longer believe he will ever return to Cutter Gap. The Cove holds many fond memories for him, I'm sure, but he has made a life for himself in Baltimore now. I believe he will stay there." "Yur right, Miz Alice. I was just wonderin' an' all. You know. How everyone thought that Doc and Christy would...well..." Ruby Mae turned to Christy and asked in a quiet voice, "Christy, would you mind my askin' ya, do ya have any regrets about not ever bein' able to marry Doc MacNeill?" Alice placed her hand gently on Christy's shoulder as Christy turned to gaze out the window, tears pooling in her eyes. *Regrets? Do I have regrets?* Chapter 5 Christy backed out of the mission house room and closed the door. Her hand was fumbling at her throat. "Neil...with Margaret...in Baltimore?" She had entered though this third door with such a familiar and inviting feeling, but had been so unsettled while closing it. She looked at the last door. "Oh, do I even dare to open this one after the last?" She reached out tentatively, then deciding, grasped the knob and turned. ********** This door opened into an unfamiliar, yet cozy, room. A fire was crackling in the river stone fireplace. Hooked rugs covered the hard wood floor. Childish crayon drawings were tacked to the wood plank walls. A little girl with reddish-blonde curls and bright blue eyes, almost three years old, was playing at Christy's feet. She looked up at her mother seated in the rocking chair and smiled the sweetest smile, then went back to playing with her doll. The sound of footsteps was heard from the front porch, and then the door swung open. "You boys remember to wipe your feet, please," Christy called to remind the two stocky boys. "Oh, yeah, thorry, Mama," five-year old Alex lisped. The boy grinned at his mother and she saw the little gap where Alex's front tooth had been until last night. Christy smiled. Her husband had had quite a time last night, trying to convince Alex to let him remove the dangling tooth. Finally, after an hour of patient explanation on his father's part, Alex had agreed and it had taken only one short tug for it to come out. The tooth was gone, but it had left Alex with the most adorable lisp. The little boy with brown hair, just the color of Christy's, went back and wiped his feet on the door mat, then ran to his mother to show her the arrowhead he'd found while playing. "It'th the betht one I've theen tho far!" "Why that's wonderful, Alex. And where's your brother?" "He'th coming, Mama." Christy looked up from her chair to see a taller boy enter the room slowly. He checked his boots to make sure there was no mud tracking in on the floor. Seven-year old Neil William closed the door behind him and also came over to hug Christy. "I was careful, Mom. I made sure my boots were clean. Pop says to be sure to help out more, now that you're, well, you know..." He blushed to the roots of his tousled sandy red curls. Christy smiled as she struggled to get her bulky form out of the comfortable rocking chair. She had only one more month to go in this pregnancy, and already felt larger that she had been with her three others. "Thank you, Neil. That was thoughtful of you and I appreciate it." Christy looked to the door, then back to her eldest son. "I thought your father was bringing you home." "He thaid he wath almoth finithed at the clinic, and that he'd be along thoon, with a thurprithe!" Alex replied with an impish grin. "Alex!" Young Neil scolded his brother. "Pop said not to tell Mom about it, so you hush up!" Christy smiled at the boys and told them to wash for dinner. She went into the large kitchen and stirred the stew that was simmering on the stove. She touched the spoon to her tongue. "Hmm. Not bad. Ida would be proud of me, I think," Christy said with a smile of pride. She looked around her kitchen and realized how much she enjoyed working in this room, and living in the house that had been built on mission property. The clinic had been built right next door, which made it much easier to see her husband, even on his busiest days. Little Annie wandered into the kitchen and tugged at her mother's skirt. Christy reached down to hug her little daughter, but found her bulky waist wouldn't allow her to bend all the way down, so she patted Annie's cheek. "Oh, you little sweetie! Your Mama just loves your hugs and kisses!" Annie gave a wet little kiss on the back of Christy's hand, then tightened her chubby arms around her mother legs. "And your Papa loves your hugs and kisses, too!" Dr. Neil MacNeill laughed as he came through the front door. "Neil! Your feet!" The doctor grinned sheepishly and went back to wipe the mud off his feet. "I'll remember one day, Lass. I truly don't mean to make more work for you by tracking in the mud." He crossed the room and reached his arms out for a welcoming hug from his two ‘lasses'. He scooped Annie into his left arm, then circled his right around his wife's waist. Christy rested her head against Neil's chest and sighed. "Are you tired, Lass?" His tender look of concern melted Christy's heart. "No more tired than any other day." Neil's brow furrowed. At his warning look, she continued, "Now don't start, Neil...I did rest just like you told me. Annie and I laid down for a nap and Neil William looked after Alex, so..." Christy's tumbling words kept her husband from being able to reply, so he decided to silence her ramblings in another way...with a deep kiss. All thoughts went out of Christy's head and she leaned in closer to Neil's body as their lips met. Neil pulled back from their kiss to set a squirming Annie down, then rubbed Christy's stomach fondly. "I can't neglect this wee one, now can I?" He smiled and gazed down into his wife's deep blue eyes. His favorite endearment for their unborn children had always been ‘wee one', and it melted Christy's heart each time he said it. Suddenly Christy turned away and moaned, "Oh, this belly! I'm as big as this house!" "Not a house, love, just a little shed." Neil hoped his teasing would make Christy laugh, but immediately saw his mistake. "That wasn't humorous, was it? Twas insensitive of me to have said it, Christy. I apologize." Christy sniffed. "No, it wasn't humorous." Neil gently turned Christy back to face him, and wiped the tear from her cheek with his thumb. He kept his hand on her cheek, stroking it, as he asked, "What's this, my love? Don't you know how beautiful you are to me when you carry our child within you? Your eyes shine more brilliantly, your skin glows, your face is luminous. Ah, Christy, you are the sun and moon to me. You are my bonnie lass!" He gazed deeply into her eyes as and Christy's breath caught in her throat. His intense looks always did that to her. As Neil's face came closer Christy's eyes fluttered shut, anticipating another deep kiss, when there was a knock at the door. Christy's eyes flew open, as she jumped back from Neil and began to smooth her hair. "Ah, Christy, you are something." He teased, "Don't you think that who's ever at the door knows we're married, and that we even kiss on occasion? And not only do we kiss..." he teased as his hand patted her enlarged waistline. "Well, we don't have to advertise it, Neil, " she scolded, only half playfully. "It's Grammy Alice!" The children had opened the door to Alice Henderson, who gave each child a special hug as she entered. She looked up at the couple coming from the kitchen. "Well, Neil, are thee and thy wife ready?" Alice looked as if she had swallowed a canary! "Just about, Alice. It looks as if Christy has finished cooking the children's dinner here, so if you don't mind, we'll be on our way." He turned to Christy and took her hand, leading her through the large room towards the front door. Christy tugged Neil to a stop. "What's going on?" She sputtered. "Neil, if Alice is here to join us for dinner, then let me set another place!" "Mom, I'll just take AWAY a plate, and put it back in the cupboard," smiled Neil William, who knew his father's secret. "And I'll take a fork and thpoon to put away!" Christy was puzzled, and was beginning to lose her patience with all of them. Neil saw Christy's face beginning to turn red with frustration. He told his sons, "I guess you'd better tell your Mama what we've planned, before she bites someone's head off!" "Surprise, Mom!" "Thurprithe, Mama!" The boys and Alice laughed. Annie added her own sweet giggles. Although she didn't understand, she knew it must be fun if her brothers were laughing. "Hug uth all good-bye, then go with Pop," Alex squeezed his mother, as did the two other children. "Go, and have a good time! Thy children and I will have our own adventures, won't we? Christy, thee need not worry. Just go with thy husband." Alice smiled at Christy, then shoed the couple out the door. Neil led a bewildered Christy down the steps to his horse, then carefully lifted her up to sit sideways on the saddle. Neil mounted the horse behind Christy and encircled her with his strong arms. One arm held the reins, the other arm steadied her as it tightened firmly around her back. Neil turned the horse and they rode out of the mission yard. "Let me know if you're uncomfortable, or if we ride too fast. I want you in front of me where I can hold you and keep you safe, Lass," Neil breathed the last few words softly into her ear. Christy caught her breath, then pleaded, "Neil, please. Where are we going? The children will be fine with Alice, I know, but what about the clinic?" "No need for you to worry yourself, love. Dan said he's able to handle things alone for a few days. You and I are going on an adventure, so just relax and trust me." Neil smiled as he said those last two words, knowing that Christy did trust him, but she always had a pack of questions anyway. Neil tightened his arm around Christy as they rode without speaking through the forest. She leaned against his firm chest and finally did relax and enjoy the ride. She smiled as her husband nuzzled her neck then hummed the tune of "Down In the Valley" into her ear. Soon the surroundings became familiar and Christy realized their destination. They were riding to their first home together, Neil's little cabin by the river. Eventually they came to the cabin. Neil dismounted and strong arms reached up and lifted down his very pregnant wife, as if she were as light as a feather. He cradled her in his arms, cuddling her close to his chest, and heard Christy sniff as tears filled her eyes. Misunderstanding her tears, Neil spoke quietly, "Ah, Lass. It's only for a little while. You'll be back with the children day after tomorrow. And if you miss them that much we'll head back right now." Christy secured her arms around Neil's neck and pressed her face into the hollow of his neck. She breathed the *Neil* scent that she loved. Then she raised her head to look into his face. Christy's blue eyes locked with Neil's as she spoke from her heart. "It's not that at all. I'm just so touched that you would think of doing this for me...for us. You are my life and my love! I sometimes wonder what kind of life I would have had if I had not come to Cutter Gap, if I hadn't fallen in love with a stubborn Scot of a doctor, if I hadn't finally let you explain about the day I saw you here with Margaret. Oh, Neil. I still feel so very badly about Margaret. No one should have to die a death so wracked with pain. I wish that somehow things could have worked out for Alice and Margaret, and still for us, as well. I don't know how it could have, but I still wish..." "Hush, Christy. What happened, happened. Twas not your fault or mine that Margaret died before reconciling with her mother. There is no reason for you to feel guilt. Don't continue to flog yourself over it. But alas, I, too, wish that somehow things could have worked out better for Margaret. I suppose that is why I am so determined to keep Alice as a part of our little family." Neil stood quietly holding Christy firmly in his arms, both lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Neil looked down into Christy's eyes and asked in a low voice, deep with emotion, "Christy, do you ever wish...I mean, about David...have you ever thought back to that day, that you'd rather have accepted David's proposal? Do you have any...?" He couldn't finish the painful question he'd always wanted to ask his wife. "Regrets?" Christy finished for him. "Neil, are you asking if I have any regrets?" Her reply was to reach her fingers into his tangle of curls. She pulled his head closer until his lips met hers. Their kiss began as a soft, sweet answer to his question, an answer that deepened to a promise. His lips smiled, still pressed against hers. That was definitely an answer he could understand! Still in their embrace, Neil carried Christy up the steps into the cabin, and kicked the door closed behind them. Chapter 6 Christy's body felt like lead. She was unable to move her arms or legs, or even open her eyes. Dreams of Neil and three young children swirled in her mind. *I seemed so peaceful in that home with those dear children. And with Neil. It felt so...right...so real." Then, from a far distance, she thought she heard someone call out to her. The fog in her mind began to dissipate. "Christy! Christy, can you hear me?" The voice - finally she recognized it. Neil? Neil was calling her? And then another, softer, voice. "Does thee think the fever has broken?" "Aye, finally, thank God. I was truly worried, she was unconscious for such a long time. Now that she's beginning to respond, I believe she will fully recover." "I shall go downstairs and tell David and the others. They have been waiting a long time to hear this good news!" Christy heard the footsteps of someone leaving the room, then sensed a presence come nearer to her. She felt warm breath on her face and heard a soft, deep voice. "Come on, Christy. Come back to me now. I know it's hard, Lass, but you must work to wake up." Christy struggled through the hazy swirls of confusion. Her eyelids fluttered open. Shaded windows muted the light in the room, but she could make out the rugged face that was poised so near her own. "Neil?" His name was a whisper. "Ah, Love. Finally," he breathed, then leaned forward and covered her lips with his own. Christy's eyes flew wide open. Neil was kissing her! Deeply! She pulled away from him, flushed. "Christy! I'm sorry to be so passionate, but you had me so worried. You've been unconscious for quite some time. I'm just so relieved. I didn't mean to startle you, Lass." Christy was speechless, but her thoughts were reeling in her head. *What is he saying? His face has an expression of such concern, such...love!* "I've been unconscious?" "Aye, Christy. But don't fret. You'll be fine now." His hand brushed her hair back from her forehead ever so gently. "The fever's broken and I'm confident you will recover fully. The fever was quite high, however. You were delirious, and I grew quite concerned. Well, actually, ‘terror' is a good word to describe my emotions." He smiled, but his eyes continued their intense gaze. "Neil, I had this dream. It was so very strange. There were doors. Four doors. And people I knew, and some I didn't know." "You called out in your delirium, Christy, a few times. Aye, you did say something about doors, and called out some names. You said, 'David', and my own name as well." "I don't understand." "It was the fever. You were delirious. The mind plays tricks, Christy, when it is fevered. Don't be overly concerned. You'll be fine now, although it's been quite awhile that you were unconscious." "How long?" "It's been two days now. Don't look so alarmed. I assure you, you'll recover fully." "Two days? Oh, Neil! The children! What about all the children?" Christy tried to rise from the bed. "They're fine. Alice has been with them when she was not helping me care for you, as has Fairlight. The children are with David now. You know how they love him. I'm sure he has soothed their worries, so don't fret about them, Love." His hands on her shoulders, he eased her back against the pillow. One hand smoothed the hair back from her forehead, while the other held her hand, his thumb making little swirling motions on the back of her hand. Christy knew he meant to comfort her, but the gentle caress of his thumb sent shivers through her body. He was being so...familiar. His touch was so soothing, so loving. His eyes held hers captive, and eventually Christy began to relax. There was a small knock at the door. "I told Alice that the children could come in for just a minute, Lass, to see that you're awake." "ALL of them?" "Of course all of them! They've all been worried about you, Christy. They want to be sure that you are going to be all right." Christy wondered about the wisdom of letting all the school children in at once, but Neil was the doctor. She trusted him. He smiled deep into her eyes. "The children will be relieved...now that they know their mother is better." Chapter 7 Neil began to stand, intending to move away from Christy's bedside and go to the door. He stopped when he heard the plea in Christy's voice. "Their...mother?" She asked weakly. Christy was so confused. She looked frantically around the room. Her alarm growing, Christy whimpered, "This isn't my room at the mission. This is your bedroom in your cabin! Neil! I'm in your bed!" "Aye, of course you are, Lass. We're not at the mission. We're at our old cabin." There was a knock at the door. He smiled at her, then went to the door. "Now...the children." Christy was so bewildered. The door opened a bit and Alice Henderson poked her head into the room. "Are thee ready, Neil?" "Yes, Alice. Please send them in." The door opened wider and there was a scuffling of feet. "Quiet now, children. Mama's still very tired." Three small children made their way timidly into the room. "You can come closer. See? Mama's fine now. Come, if you're very gentle you can give Mama a hug." Neil picked up the youngest child, a tiny girl with bouncing red curls, and sat her on the bed next to Christy. "Annie? Annie! Neil! Alex! Oh, my babies!" Christy wrapped one arm around the little girl and reached her other hand out towards the two older boys, who ran to her embrace. Alice followed the children into the room, a blanketed bundle in her arms. Neil turned to Alice to take the bundle and laid it in the bed next to Christy. "An here's the newest wee lass." "A baby?" Christy looked into Neil's face with a panicked plea in her eyes. "Neil. I don't understand! It's all so unclear. I thought...I thought I was at the mission. I thought David had just proposed." Neil chuckled. "He'd better not have, or your husband would be very cross with him! Not to mention our four children!" Observing her more closely, Neil's voice softened. "You really are confused? Ah, Christy. I'll explain, but first...Neil and Alex? You see now, your Mama's fine, but she's still tired. Could you take Annie back downstairs? Mama needs to rest. Aye, kiss her good-bye. You can visit with her again later. Thank you, boys. You've been very good and helpful." Each of the boys hugged and kissed their mother. "I mithed you, Mama," Alex whispered into Christy's ear. Alice lifted Annie from the bed as she spoke to the children. "Did thee know that Mrs. Spencer brought over some of her very special oatmeal cookies? Would thee like two or three? And she brought some apple cider as well. We shall have a little party downstairs, now that thy mother is all better." Smiling at the couple, Alice ushered the three children out of the bedroom. Christy then gave her attention to the baby in her arms, whose little reddish blonde tufted head began to nuzzle at her nightgown. "This is our daughter? Neil, I don't remember." Christy was almost in tears. Neil, recognizing Christy's growing alarm, suddenly became serious, all physician. "What is the last thing you do remember, Christy." "I remember leaving our home and riding to this cabin. But, Neil? That wasn't real. That was my dream, the fourth door! I remember...I know that I was in the schoolyard, with David. The school children were standing there, watching. Then you rode up. And I couldn't decide. I knew my heart's desire wasn't David, but you were with Marg... oh, Neil!" "Hush now, Lass. I will tell you all that has happened. I'm sure that in time you will remember. Shh, the wee babe is still now. Be calm. You don't want to frighten her. Let her sleep while I explain." Neil lay down on the bed next to Christy, positioning his arm under her neck so he could draw her close and cradle her head on his shoulder. "You do remember coming to this cabin?" "Yes, you carried me through the cabin door. But I thought that was part of the dream! I was in the new house with Annie, and then Neil William and Alex came in with muddy shoes...and you came in too." "Aye, with muddy boots! Do you remember who came later?" "Alice? Alice came! She did. But that was the dream, Neil. That was my dream! Standing in the schoolyard...wasn't that real?" "No, Lass. The schoolyard was the dream. Actually, it was real, but many years ago, a marriage and three - now four - children ago. No, Love. Alice and our children, our going to the old cabin, that was real." Christy looked down at the sleeping baby girl, then back at Neil's face. "Our daughter?" "Aye. She's a scrappy one, she is, coming a whole month early. She's a wee one for certain, but she's healthy. And stubborn enough to go by her own timetable. A true MacNeill!" Neil leaned over to kiss the pale red fuzz on the baby's tiny head. He moved closer to softly kiss Christy's lips. Then he grew serious. "Although she was quite early, it wasn't the babe who had me worried, Lass. But allow me to explain from the beginning. You and I went to my old cabin, our first home. I thought it would be a nice get-away, a time for us to have a day or two alone before the babe came. We knew the baby's birth would be in another month or so, but she had another plan. We were only alone in the cabin that first night. Early the next morning, before dawn, your water broke while you slept. Things progressed so quickly from there. I had no time to go for Alice or Fairlight. I delivered the baby within an hour of your first pain. This wee lass," Neil took the baby's hand, which wrapped around his index finger, "Would not wait." He softly kissed the fragile fingers. As Neil gazed into Christy's eyes, his own filled with tears and his voice grew low and husky. "Then I couldn't stop your bleeding. There was no way I could go for help, with you in your condition. And there was the baby to care for, she was so tiny. I couldn't doctor you both at once. I did not know what to do. Thank God Almighty that Fairlight happened by. She brought an armful of wildflowers to place in the cabin. She was mixed up and thought we were going to the cabin later that day, not the night before. Fairlight was Heaven sent! She cleaned up the baby, then we worked together to stop your bleeding. I thought I would lose you that day, Christy." Neil buried his face into her hair. His back shuddered with his sobs. Christy brought her arm around to stroke his hair, understanding his emotion. It was when Neil sobbed against her that Christy realized, without a doubt, that truly they were husband and wife. This was no dream. God had made of their two hearts, one. Suddenly, all turmoil left her and Christy was filled with peace. "Shh, Neil. I'm here, Love." Sensing the change in Christy's mood, Neil gave her the deeply loving kiss that he had been waiting to give her for days. After long moments their lips parted. Neil laid his head back down on the pillow, looking into Christy's eyes, so that he could continue his explanation. He took a deep, ragged breath, and went on. "Fairlight and I were finally able to stop the bleeding, but you were unconscious from loss of blood. Then the fever began. You gave me quite a scare. I've never been so terrified in my life as I was that day. But I begged God...and I begged you to hang onto life. With His help, you did." The baby began to stir and whimper, again beginning to nuzzle at her mother. Neil got up and helped Christy sit up and situate the baby so that she could nurse the tiny infant. His arm around her shoulders, Christy leaned back against his chest. "Neil, if she's already two days old, how did you feed her?" "You fed her, with Fairlight and Alice's help. It was complicated at first, but then the women figured out the best way to do it, positioning you on your side and the babe next to you." "Oh, Fairlight and Alice. They are always here when I need them to be." "Aye, and Opal came for awhile yesterday. Then there were our three youngsters to watch. They were not much trouble, though, as they were too worried about their mother to run wild. David was wonderful. He played with the boys and cuddled Annie when she whimpered for you. We are blessed to have such good friends." Neil and Christy silently watched their newborn. Finally, the baby was done nursing. Neil took his daughter. He placed her against his shoulder and gently patted her back. He whispered little loving names into her tiny ear, "Ah, pigeon. Papa needs a little burp now, my wee, sweet lass." The baby let out a loud burp. "Ah, such a loud belch for such a wee babe!" He chuckled and smiled at Christy. "She sounds like her big brothers after a hearty meal!" Christy smiled as she watched Neil with the baby. She always loved seeing her husband with one of their children as a newborn. She would be content to spend her entire day watching him snuggle a tiny baby against his broad chest. Or he would cradle the baby in his arms and stroll around the room, singing Highland songs, or whispering little words of love to his child. Now that the three children were older, he was still attentive and loving towards young Neil and Alex, but Neil was the sweetest with Annie, since she was his little daughter. It would be the same with this baby girl. Neil gently laid the baby back in Christy's arms, then cuddled his wife in his arms once again. Christy looked at her baby daughter and whispered sadly, "I wish I could remember her birth." Neil looked into his wife's eyes. "You will. Once you're rested and fully recovered, I have no doubt that you will recall everything. Remember, Christy, you had a high fever. Your body has been through quite an ordeal, as has your mind. Do you trust me?" "Of course." She again gave her attention to the tiny one in her arms. "What did you name her?" "I haven't given her a name. I hoped and prayed that we would be able to name her together. I'm sure she's quite tired of hearing ‘my wee lass'. We did consider the name ‘Fairlight', didn't we?" "Yes, we did. And since Fairlight Spencer came along just at the right time to help..." "Aye, and this lassie came to us in the fair light of dawn. It's perfect!" "Fairlight MacNeill. Oh, she is sweet, isn't she, Neil? And so beautiful!" Neil had his eyes and his mind on his wife. "Aye, that she is. The loveliest I've ever seen. Truly, I am a blessed man," Neil whispered. He was silent and pensive for a few minutes, then asked quietly, "Christy, I do know you love me, but after all this time...have you ever regretted our marriage, or our life here in the Cove? Sometimes I think of the life you might have had if you had married David, or someone else from Asheville..." "Neil, I have never had even a moment of regret. Only millions of moments of rejoicing." Neil wrapped his arms tightly around his wife and baby daughter. His lips met hers in a impassioned kiss, adding many more moments of joy to Christy's life. Alice was just opening the door to ask the two if they wanted lunch. She placed her index finger against her lips and smiled at the scene before her. Very quietly, Alice backed out of the room and closed the door. "Joy is the spring that flows from the Fountain of Life, the river that swirls around cold, stone hearts and christens with the warm waters of the Father's love." The End!